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You're never going to a sleep over Edit

Posted by on Feb. 15, 2013 at 6:18 PM
  • 38 Replies

 

Poll

Question: what do you think

Options:

My kids can go to sleep overs if I know the parents

only after they're in high school

no never

they can go when they're in middle school

I don't know either.


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Total Votes: 75

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So when I was a kid my parents were extremely reluctant to let us stay at friends house because they were afraid something would happen to us. Eventually they caved in and we were aloud to sleep at my friend down the street's house. I'm not sure what happened in detail (I just don't know how to ask) but I saw her brother (15) kissing my sister (10.) I was a kid, I knew it was wrong but I didn't know what to say. Later my parents saw her diary (that she had thrown away after arguing with my dad) in the trash and when my mom picked it up she saw the word "kissing" and slammed it shut. She told my dad what she saw and he about tore through it looking for that entry (my mom told me it was scary later.) I don't know what they read but it was a HUGE deal, we were never allowed to so much as speak to them again. 

My mom had always been afraid of the other kid's dads because she was frightened by her friend's father when she was in elementry school. Her friend had to push a heavey dresser against her door to keep him out at night and when he came home drunk he spent half the night pounding on the door and yelling at her to let him in. Her mom didn't even try to stop him and no one knows what would have happened if he did get in. 

So with all this, and another post I just read I'm thinking sleep overs just aren't worth the risk

I think I wrote it a little confusing sorry. We were staying with our friend who was 12 and a girl. She had a 15 year old brother who kissed my 10 year old sister. I guess I'd be more worried the more men/boys in the house. 

by on Feb. 15, 2013 at 6:18 PM
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Replies (1-10):
almostthere55
by on Feb. 15, 2013 at 6:57 PM

To me I think if you know the parents or family well and trust your child they can have sleep overs.  We have them at our house more than my dd goes elsewhere.  She has 3 close friends and those are the only places she spends the night at.  I've never had an issue arise as you are talking about, but could understand your hesitation.

aurora.dove
by Bronze Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 7:07 PM
1 mom liked this

I am paranoid about leaving my kid with with his grandparents overnight, and I trust them more than anyone else in the world lol. He's not even two yet so maybe I'll feel differently later in life. He will not be allowed to stay with anyone who's parents I don't know though. I know as a young kid and teenager I was allowed to stay with friends even though my parents didn't know theirs. Nothing really bad ever happened but it could have. I had friends who's parents bought us alcohol, let us wander the streets at all hours of the night, etc. I would be TERRIFIED for my child to do some of the things my friends parents allowed us to do.

MsRkg
by Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 7:13 PM
I try not to hold my personal experiences against my son and use them as a reason to limit his interactions from people who can be vastly different from the people who hurt me. Instead I use though experiences to help me to make the right judgement in a situation, and realize that each situation is different from another. So I would never carte blance say that my child cannot do anything , I would get to know the people in question first.
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atlmom2
by Platinum Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 7:23 PM
1 mom liked this
Mine are grown and started sleepovers around age 4. We moved around a lot. I would never deprive kids of that. In HS every weekend was a sleepover somewhere. Nothing ever happened. Parents are way too paranoid today. Very sad for kids. Too helicopter.
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MrsApple
by Bronze Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 7:28 PM

My daughter is 6 and up until she started kindergarten,she'd only done sleepovers with her grandparents but we have started letting her do sleepovers with a couple of her friends but we had to know the parents first.We've become really good friends with the family and trust them 100% or she would NOT be allowed over to their homes.It will continue to be like that until she's too old to want to do sleepovers :) 

Bmat
by Barb on Feb. 15, 2013 at 7:56 PM

The parents having the sleepover must keep a close eye on the children. And a 15 year  old boy at a sleepover with 10 year old girls? He should have had his own sleepover at a friend's house that night.

Bmat
by Barb on Feb. 15, 2013 at 7:57 PM

I voted that yes they can go to sleepovers. This is part of childhood- the girls do each others' hair and eat snacks and talk and laugh. It is something fondly remembered.- but there must be common sense. The parents there, teenage boys, not there.

frndlyfn
by Platinum Member on Feb. 15, 2013 at 7:58 PM

She hasnt been to one yet due to scheduling issues but if we know the parents and everyone in household well enough we would let her stay over.  My mom has never done over nights with her until recently and it is only one night at the hotel where she stays.  I cant remember the age i started going to sleepovers.  I think it was 2nd or 3rd grade for friends.  I was also allowed to have any gender friends in my room to hang out or we would go to their house.  I was playing outside alot then always walking to someones house during daylight hours.

alexis_06
by AnnaLisa on Feb. 16, 2013 at 3:30 AM

 my daughter went to her first sleepover when she was 7 (grade 2) it was for her best friends birthday..after that one sleepover, shes had many with that girl....however i feel much more comfortable when they sleep here :) 

alexis_06
by AnnaLisa on Feb. 16, 2013 at 3:32 AM

 as for me, i also had my first sleepover when i was in grade 2..i attended a private school, and my best friends dad was a teacher there, so i guess my parents felt like it was safe..i remember having soo much fun!!  my next sleepover wasnt until grade 6 tho..because after grade 2, i was the only girl in my class (cuz that friend ended up moving away)..LOL. so yaa they wouldnt let me have sleepovers with the boys...go figure..  :)

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