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Advice for Moms Advice for Moms

Help!!!

Posted by on Feb. 17, 2013 at 6:43 PM
  • 20 Replies
1 mom liked this

Today I nearly broke down in tears cause I have been really stressed out with school, and everything that I have to take care of in my life, like take care of my son, get my i.d. so I can graduate and getting my appointments done....what I need advice from is how do I calm down so I wont take it out on my son? I really would like some advice from anyone. 

by on Feb. 17, 2013 at 6:43 PM
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Replies (1-10):
lucky2Beeme
by Gold Member on Feb. 17, 2013 at 6:48 PM

exercise you can walk him  to burn of some of the stress.

Lindalou907
by Silver Member on Feb. 17, 2013 at 7:18 PM

Is there someone who can watch him for a little while so you can get some respite? Take some deep breaths and realize that everything will get done honey, you can try to make a list and prioritize what is MOST important and work your way down the list. If you are worried that you might hurt him set him down to cry and walk away until you feel a little better, and call someone you trust.

brittany208
by on Feb. 17, 2013 at 7:32 PM

I always make to-do lists.

And you can even mark which ones need to be done today, which need to be done this week, and which ones can wait. Or mark tasks on a calendar for which ones you'll do for today, or on a certain day. Then you can focus on what needs to be done today, while still being aware of--but not stressed about--things that don't need to be done today.

You can also seperate large tasks into smaller tasks. For example--if you need to write a paper, instead of putting "paper" on your to-do list, write "select topic, research topic, rough draft, proofread/edit" Then instead of being overwhelemed by "write paper" you see "select topic" and think--"I can do that!" Plus, I LOVE crossing things off my to-do list :)

Do you have anyone to take care of your son for awhile so you can get some stuff done? When I was in school, I left DS with DH for four hours to go to the library and write papers. I found I got a LOT more done when I set aside a specific time and specific place that I wouldn't be distracted. Trying to work at home got me no where, but sitting in the library--suddenly I was cranking out paper after paper! And I had my list of all the papers I needed to write, so I could be focused and do them, instead of "oh crap, I forgot this paper I need.... dont know where to start.... etc etc etc"

brittany208
by on Feb. 17, 2013 at 7:33 PM

What made me feel better was just being focused, having a plan, and getting it DONE!

kali_mom
by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 9:26 AM
1 mom liked this
I am sure it is weighing on you and the fact you are seeking help shows you are a great mom. I like to use my phone and set timers so that I know I will allow myself only so much time on a particular project or task. When I complete a task it gets scratched off my list and then I either wait 5 mins before moving on to the next task or dive right into the next one. When stressed count to 25 then hug your son. That beautiful child you created loves you and will give you the biggest hug back. Be strong :-)
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Reina13
by Bronze Member on Feb. 18, 2013 at 9:44 AM

I think making lists is a great idea.

You can also take him for a walk or to the park. Enjoyable for him and a good way to relieve some of your stress as well.



Enjoy a Coffee Break Every Tuesday with Us!

Quoting brittany208:

I always make to-do lists.

And you can even mark which ones need to be done today, which need to be done this week, and which ones can wait. Or mark tasks on a calendar for which ones you'll do for today, or on a certain day. Then you can focus on what needs to be done today, while still being aware of--but not stressed about--things that don't need to be done today.

You can also seperate large tasks into smaller tasks. For example--if you need to write a paper, instead of putting "paper" on your to-do list, write "select topic, research topic, rough draft, proofread/edit" Then instead of being overwhelemed by "write paper" you see "select topic" and think--"I can do that!" Plus, I LOVE crossing things off my to-do list :)

Do you have anyone to take care of your son for awhile so you can get some stuff done? When I was in school, I left DS with DH for four hours to go to the library and write papers. I found I got a LOT more done when I set aside a specific time and specific place that I wouldn't be distracted. Trying to work at home got me no where, but sitting in the library--suddenly I was cranking out paper after paper! And I had my list of all the papers I needed to write, so I could be focused and do them, instead of "oh crap, I forgot this paper I need.... dont know where to start.... etc etc etc"


erikadi
by Bronze Member on Feb. 18, 2013 at 10:36 AM

Breathe, sing in the shower, go into your bedroom turn up the music and scream and hit pillows.

Mommy2justone
by Mommy2justtwo on Feb. 18, 2013 at 10:42 AM

Go take a brisk walk with him, or during your lunch break at school. Deep breathing, yoga. Anything to calm your brain. Also, before reacting to anything, count to 10 in your head. You can do it momma! My sister did it, she was 16 when she had my neice, 18 when she had her next and now is 30 and has 5 kids, a house, a full time career, and finished college. Take whatever support you can get and get it done! Don't give up, and don't stress out!! 
(HUGS) 

Bmat
by Barb on Feb. 18, 2013 at 10:51 AM

If you are religious, you will find praying about this to be very helpful.

Practice relaxing breathing-  Inhale slowly, exhale very slowly and let the tension flow out through your breath. Do this several times and think peaceful thoughts- about how much you love your child, your favorite place to visit, something that makes you happy- how graduating will help you and your child. 

Getting fresh air with your son may help blow away some cobwebs.

Learn to direct your anger and frustration. If you find that your child is on the receiving  end, then strongly tell yourself NO! Do NOT take this out on the helpless child. Every time. 

If you have someone who could watch the child and give you a break, even if you trade babysitting with another mom, it would benefit both.  If you still find that you are disturbed about your behavior toward your child, then get some advice from your doctor.

snazzylady1
by on Feb. 18, 2013 at 11:50 AM

I practice yoga and meditation.  Everymorning I mediate. If you can't in the morning try just a few minutes right before you go to bed.  Ondemand has some great little 10 min yoga videos.  Always take time for you even if it is just a few minutes.  It will pay off in the end. 

Tonya Simmons

smartandsnazzykids.com

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