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Advice for Moms Advice for Moms

I know a lot of women have been in the position where they are pregnant and have a friend who is also expecting and the friend loses the child. This has happened to me once with my first child and I did a pretty decent job of helping my friend grieve but this time it is my sister and within my healthy 30 week so far pregnancy my sister has been overjoyed and crushed twice by miscarriage. I want even more to be able to take her pain away and to fix this problem that of course I have no power to fix. I don't understand why she is having trouble while there are so many dead beats that have no trouble. I sometimes even get mad that I can so easily make a life and others have such hard times. I beat myself up even though I am so greatful that I can have a healthy child while other people have so much trouble. I am also obsessing about my baby and if she is ok. I can't even enjoy this pregnancy anymore because I am so afraid of losing her. I sometimes question how I am one of the lucky ones.  

by on Feb. 20, 2013 at 11:04 PM
Replies (11-14):
Mommy2justone
by Mommy2justtwo on Feb. 22, 2013 at 8:35 AM
God wanted us to be foster parents. It didn't become clear until we started looking into adoption and found out about our agency's foster to adopt program. It took a lot of praying and patience on our part. We are still being patient waiting for our license to come.

Quoting Armywife081011:

Thank you. Its hard to see someone you love go through that pain. It makes me feel a little better knowing that someone in a similar position to hers doesn't feel any resentment. I don't understand why things are the way they are but I keep praying that it will become clearer eventually.



Quoting Mommy2justone:

Just be there for her. 
My sister was able to have 5 healthy children, and I could only have one. I do not resent her for that. I know that God has plans for me and my family.
And I love my nieces and nephews to the end of the earth.
Don't be afraid to talk to her about things, she is your sister after all. 




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ChancesMommy07
by on Feb. 22, 2013 at 8:52 AM
1 mom liked this

I've had 1 full term stillbirth and 6 miscarriages. I have one living child. Just be there for her but don't feel guilt over your own pregnancies. I've had friends that didn't want to tell me they were pregnant for fear of how I would take it. My fertility issues are my own and I wouldn't want anyone else to ever have to experience them and I certainly wouldn't begrudge anyone else their happiness!

marisab
by on Feb. 22, 2013 at 9:56 AM

lets not look at thos ewho can those who shouldnt ..more is she trying to hard..maybe she needs relax take a vacation ;explore other options to have a kid thats usually when it happens... do not talk about your bbays unless she wants to ... i have had as many misses as live births and sometimes it just happens

nicoleg806
by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 11:34 AM
1 mom liked this

 I have had a miscarriage and it was hard to see others pregnant. My friend also had a miscarriage and just told her I have been there and I would be there to talk anytime of day or night. Just to listen or be a shoulder to cry on. I hope she has a healthy baby in her near future.

hugs

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