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Neighbor won't let son come over to play with mine

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Because hubby smokes (outside only) my neighbor saw for the first time and now she won't let my sons class mate play at our house. She did before. They live right beside us so its really weird running into them all the time. You can totally tell she is being standoffish all of a sudden. 

by on Feb. 26, 2013 at 1:30 PM
Replies (41-50):
lucyblue202
by Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 2:38 PM

I personally don't think it's a big deal if he is smoking outside. If he was smoking inside that would be a different story all together. However, in saying that, every parent is entitled to their own opinion and if she doesn't want her child around that, it's her choice. There isn't much you can do so just forget it.

cjsmom1
by Silver Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 2:39 PM
You assume I don't know anything, how cute. I am aware of the dangers. It's perfectly legal to buy cigarettes. Stopping your child from going to someone's home isn't going to change anything. If people are so concerned then do something to make cigarettes illegal.


Quoting sabrtooth1:

 




Quoting cjsmom1:

No I don't smoke and never have. Personally I think cigarettes should stop being made. However they're such a big revenue for states it'll never happen. He is smoking outside not around the kids and I think it's wrong to not allow these kids to play because of that.


Google " DANGERS OF THIRD-HAND SMOKE", and you might learn something.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
tihone77
by Bronze Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 2:42 PM


Quoting cjsmom1:

I find it ridiculous. If he does it outside the house and it's not around the kids then there's no reason for her to not let the kids over. I understand smoking isn't healthy but a lot of things aren't.



stepconfused182
by Kelley on Feb. 26, 2013 at 2:42 PM
1 mom liked this

How will not allowing your child around others who smoke not change anything? I'm being completely sincere here, not sarcastic or rude. You say if people are so concerned then do something to make cigarettes illegal. Wouldn't the easier more achievable option be to keep your children away from exposure to smoke?

Quoting cjsmom1:

You assume I don't know anything, how cute. I am aware of the dangers. It's perfectly legal to buy cigarettes. Stopping your child from going to someone's home isn't going to change anything. If people are so concerned then do something to make cigarettes illegal.


Quoting sabrtooth1:

 


 


Quoting cjsmom1:

No I don't smoke and never have. Personally I think cigarettes should stop being made. However they're such a big revenue for states it'll never happen. He is smoking outside not around the kids and I think it's wrong to not allow these kids to play because of that.


Google " DANGERS OF THIRD-HAND SMOKE", and you might learn something.


 

-PB
by Gold Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 2:42 PM

 There's something I'd vote for!  :-)  I think some states will move in that direction eventually but until that time...my child will go to non-smoker's homes only.  :-/

Quoting cjsmom1:

You assume I don't know anything, how cute. I am aware of the dangers. It's perfectly legal to buy cigarettes. Stopping your child from going to someone's home isn't going to change anything. If people are so concerned then do something to make cigarettes illegal.


Quoting sabrtooth1:

 


 


Quoting cjsmom1:

No I don't smoke and never have. Personally I think cigarettes should stop being made. However they're such a big revenue for states it'll never happen. He is smoking outside not around the kids and I think it's wrong to not allow these kids to play because of that.


Google " DANGERS OF THIRD-HAND SMOKE", and you might learn something.


 

Mommy2justone
by Mommy2justtwo on Feb. 26, 2013 at 2:44 PM

In some states it is illegal to smoke in your car with children under a certain age. So there is some action being taken to protect children. 
But you are correct, it is perfectly legal to buy cigarettes, and perfectly legal to smoke in your home around your children or outside of your home bringing in third hand smoke. But around my child. And it is my right, as a parent, to decide if I want my child around that.
I don't think it is "wrong" to keep the children from playing at her home at all.

There are a couple things I do think are wrong with all of this, but I shall keep my judgements to myself.  And just express my rights as a parent to decide if I want my child exposed to that.

Quoting cjsmom1:

You assume I don't know anything, how cute. I am aware of the dangers. It's perfectly legal to buy cigarettes. Stopping your child from going to someone's home isn't going to change anything. If people are so concerned then do something to make cigarettes illegal.


Quoting sabrtooth1:





Quoting cjsmom1:

No I don't smoke and never have. Personally I think cigarettes should stop being made. However they're such a big revenue for states it'll never happen. He is smoking outside not around the kids and I think it's wrong to not allow these kids to play because of that.


Google " DANGERS OF THIRD-HAND SMOKE", and you might learn something.



Camsmom101007
by Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 2:45 PM

He isn't cuddling with the boys....my goodness! People have the right to their opinion. We ALL know the facts. 

Quoting emilysmom8:

 

Quoting cjsmom1:

I find it ridiculous. If he does it outside the house and it's not around the kids then there's no reason for her to not let the kids over. I understand smoking isn't healthy but a lot of things aren't.

 Smoke stays on your clothes and in your hair. Even if someone smokes away from kids does not mean they dont breath in the toxins.


cjsmom1
by Silver Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 2:55 PM
I'm not trying to be an a$$hole sorry if it's coming off that way. I think this women not allowing her child there is only punishing her child. He's been over there countless times before. Kids will be exposed to second hand smoke at some point, even if not very often. I just don't understand how people plan to protect the kids from everything.


Quoting stepconfused182:

How will not allowing your child around others who smoke not change anything? I'm being completely sincere here, not sarcastic or rude. You say if people are so concerned then do something to make cigarettes illegal. Wouldn't the easier more achievable option be to keep your children away from exposure to smoke?


Quoting cjsmom1:

You assume I don't know anything, how cute. I am aware of the dangers. It's perfectly legal to buy cigarettes. Stopping your child from going to someone's home isn't going to change anything. If people are so concerned then do something to make cigarettes illegal.



Quoting sabrtooth1:


 



 



Quoting cjsmom1:

No I don't smoke and never have. Personally I think cigarettes should stop being made. However they're such a big revenue for states it'll never happen. He is smoking outside not around the kids and I think it's wrong to not allow these kids to play because of that.



Google " DANGERS OF THIRD-HAND SMOKE", and you might learn something.



 


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
stepconfused182
by Kelley on Feb. 26, 2013 at 2:59 PM

 I didn't think you were being an a$$hole at all. I don't get offended by things people say on here and am perfectly capable of a friendly debate :). I do see what you are saying and your opinion is what's important for you and your kids. But second hand smoke and third hand smoke are very different as are the dangers and transmission. Just thought I would point that out!

Quoting cjsmom1:

I'm not trying to be an a$$hole sorry if it's coming off that way. I think this women not allowing her child there is only punishing her child. He's been over there countless times before. Kids will be exposed to second hand smoke at some point, even if not very often. I just don't understand how people plan to protect the kids from everything.


Quoting stepconfused182:

How will not allowing your child around others who smoke not change anything? I'm being completely sincere here, not sarcastic or rude. You say if people are so concerned then do something to make cigarettes illegal. Wouldn't the easier more achievable option be to keep your children away from exposure to smoke?


Quoting cjsmom1:

You assume I don't know anything, how cute. I am aware of the dangers. It's perfectly legal to buy cigarettes. Stopping your child from going to someone's home isn't going to change anything. If people are so concerned then do something to make cigarettes illegal.



Quoting sabrtooth1:


 



 



Quoting cjsmom1:

No I don't smoke and never have. Personally I think cigarettes should stop being made. However they're such a big revenue for states it'll never happen. He is smoking outside not around the kids and I think it's wrong to not allow these kids to play because of that.



Google " DANGERS OF THIRD-HAND SMOKE", and you might learn something.



 


 

cjsmom1
by Silver Member on Feb. 26, 2013 at 3:00 PM
I think to put all these restrictions on someone for buying something legal is nuts. I don't ever see smoking becoming illegal because it brings in too much revenue (through taxes). Sadly many people who smoke get addicted at a young age.


Quoting Mommy2justone:

In some states it is illegal to smoke in your car with children under a certain age. So there is some action being taken to protect children. 
But you are correct, it is perfectly legal to buy cigarettes, and perfectly legal to smoke in your home around your children or outside of your home bringing in third hand smoke. But around my child. And it is my right, as a parent, to decide if I want my child around that.
I don't think it is "wrong" to keep the children from playing at her home at all.

There are a couple things I do think are wrong with all of this, but I shall keep my judgements to myself.  And just express my rights as a parent to decide if I want my child exposed to that.

Quoting cjsmom1:

You assume I don't know anything, how cute. I am aware of the dangers. It's perfectly legal to buy cigarettes. Stopping your child from going to someone's home isn't going to change anything. If people are so concerned then do something to make cigarettes illegal.





Quoting sabrtooth1:







Quoting cjsmom1:

No I don't smoke and never have. Personally I think cigarettes should stop being made. However they're such a big revenue for states it'll never happen. He is smoking outside not around the kids and I think it's wrong to not allow these kids to play because of that.



Google " DANGERS OF THIRD-HAND SMOKE", and you might learn something.





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