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Changing a placement plan and how it affects the children

Posted by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 10:25 PM
  • 6 Replies

My children are 12 and 8 years old. I have been divorced from their father for 6 years and have had primary placement the entire time. Their father is now asking for a 50/50 placement saying that he wants more time with them. He has had them every-other weekend this whole time. I am hesitant to jump into such a big change. I would rather do something a little smaller to see how it goes. Maybe adding Wednesday and Thursday to his every-other weekend?? Wondering if anyone has done any of this before and how it affected the children. Thanks

by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 10:25 PM
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Replies (1-6):
SexyTeacher
by Gold Member on Mar. 3, 2013 at 10:30 PM
1 mom liked this

I never had this problem-we have always had 50/50. Adding more time a little at the time sounds like a good idea. You can tell if the kids like it or not after a few weeks.

frndlyfn
by Platinum Member on Mar. 3, 2013 at 10:33 PM

At this age they will better  understand what is going on.  I am presuming you are in the same school district so adding or detracting days of his residence wouldnt interfere with school.  Maybe do thurs night through monday or something where he needs to pick them up thursdays and drop off mondays.

MaggieMay0036
by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 10:47 PM

Yeah, we are in the same area. School wouldn't be affected at all. I just don't want to 'rock the boat' too much if that makes sense. Things have been good all these years so I don't want to change it too much.

funhappymom
by on Mar. 4, 2013 at 8:48 AM
1 mom liked this

Have you talked to your ex about gradually going into this? Maybe sit down with him, talk to him about it and see what he says. Then I would suggest sitting down with the kids and your ex and let them know about it and see what their thoughts are. I think they're both at the age with their input is very important, especially the 12 year old. It could be that they want to spend more time with dad, too. Good luck with this. It has to be very difficult for you (((HUGS)))


Reina13
by Bronze Member on Mar. 4, 2013 at 11:37 AM

I agree with this.

Good luck



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Quoting funhappymom:

Have you talked to your ex about gradually going into this? Maybe sit down with him, talk to him about it and see what he says. Then I would suggest sitting down with the kids and your ex and let them know about it and see what their thoughts are. I think they're both at the age with their input is very important, especially the 12 year old. It could be that they want to spend more time with dad, too. Good luck with this. It has to be very difficult for you (((HUGS)))




MJP76
by on Mar. 4, 2013 at 11:40 AM

He has just as much right as you do, and anything other that 50/50 is kind of selfish IMO. Although, I will say this. In order for 50/50 to take place he'd have to live in the same school district as not to uproot your children.

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