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Q&A Giveaway! Ask the Happiness Expert and You Could WIN!!

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What's the #1 thing that stands between you and true happiness? Whether you're just unhappy right now or you have struggled for a long time, our expert is here to help you to be happier in your life!


Margaret Curley Sanborn, author of the book The Practical Guide to Happiness, will be here March 6th to offer her advice and answer your questions in this thread!

As a bonus, three moms who reply to this post to ask Margaret a question will win a copy of the book!

                                        ^Click the book to take a virtual book tour!

Please ask your questions for Margaret in the replies below. Margaret will post her answers here as well.

Welcome, Margaret, and thanks for joining us!

The Official Rules:

  • The Practical Guide Giveaway starts 3/4/13 at 12pm (ET) and ends 3/20/2013 at 11pm (ET) (the "Giveaway Period").
  • Enter by replying to this post with an appropriate comment during the Giveaway Period.
  • Multiple entries are permitted and encouraged, as it increases your chances of winning.
  • Three winners will be selected in a random drawing of all eligible entries to receive a copy of The Practical Guide to Happiness: If You Don't Like How You're Feeling, Think Again.
  • The random drawing shall occur on or about 3/28/13.
  • No Purchase Necessary.
  • Open to US, DC, and PR residents 16 years and older.
  • Void where prohibited. Click here for the rest of the Official Rules.
by on Mar. 4, 2013 at 12:25 PM
Replies (211-220):
by on Mar. 7, 2013 at 7:33 AM

 i am  happy with my life but I think the thing that would make truely happy would for my son to not be chronically ill.

by on Mar. 7, 2013 at 10:59 AM
I was raised by my father alone. My mother left when I was a baby. My mother is an addict, my father however is just a hippie. He smokes weed.
After I became a teen my dad was not able to provide me what I needed, so I became a state ward. I went into care the summer before I turned 14, and aged out at 19. I was in 13 different placements in that time. I was raped my senior year of high school not long after my 18th birthday in November. I have been in abusive relationships, the last of which lasted two years with my children's biological father.

I realize that I have had a... colorful past. It is not that I am unhappy with who I am inside. I a very good person with a good heart. I am strong because I have been weak. I hold pride on myself for having overcome all I have. I am only 21 now, and have been through so much in soblittle time, but do not regret it because it gave me the life I have today.

When I speek of self esteem issues, it is not my inner slef that is the problem. I have no confidence in how I look. I always have. I hit puberty early- getting acne at age eight and my period at ten. I also have the misfortune of being an extremely hairy woman by nature, which has always upset me. Also I am fat. Plain and simple. And itbis not within my controll. I have thyroid problems that I am working through. Also, I am afraid I feel I am quite ugly, regardless of assurance from others. I am sure I would not feel so ugly were I not big as a whale at the moment.

Quoting ThinkAgainMom:

You could read this book on happiness, and there are some stories that may help you. It would also helop you become more aware of your thinking and helo you change some of it. 

But if your low self-esteem is a lifelong issue, you would be well served to find out it's source.  If you came out of your childhood not believing in yourself, there are some problems with how you were raised and the beliefs you were given about yourself and the world.  I had a terrible childhood and I spent my 20's undoing the impact of what had been done to me. 

I recommend a good therapist.  If you don't have money, did you come from a family with addiction - to alcohol, gambling, drugs, food?  If you did, you can find free meetings for "Adult Children of Alocholics" in your area.  It is a 12 step group and it would accept you, even if the addiction in your household wasn't alcohol.

Quoting ericndaimonsmom:

My biggest problem has always been lack of confidence and self worth. I never seem to be good enough for me. It is particularly difficult right now. I have recently gained a lot of weight due to a thyroid issue(weight gain is a big ole slap in the face when you already have low self esteem).
So, how do I build self worth? I have tried possitive self talk, but it has never really worked. How do I become more confident? How do I become happy with myself?
Any advice would be so appreciated.
Thank you, and God bless!


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Mar. 7, 2013 at 1:16 PM

Sounds like you have tremendous courage and strength!  Good for you.

I truly hope you win this GIveaway, or can afford an ecopy.  There are stories in the book you will likely relate to:

"If I were thinner, or more fit, I would be happy"

"If I were better looking, I would be happy"

There are two stories for each subject with subtle differences in the way the characters view the world and themselves.  One character is happier than the other.  I am demonstrating how even subtle changes in perception and thinking can have a big impact on your happiness.

The second half of the book goes through practical actions and daily steps you can take to teach yourself how to perceive the world differently and to think more positively.

If you would like to read this and don't win and need help affording a copy, message me privately. I will make sure you get one!



by on Mar. 7, 2013 at 5:42 PM
i have a difficult time forgiving myself for mistakes I have made in the past - especially the mistakes that still affect me every day. How can I overcome my regrets and move on with my life?
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by on Mar. 7, 2013 at 9:07 PM
1 mom liked this

Think of the younger woman who made those mistakes like your daughter. If she was your daughter, no matter what she did, wouldn't you still give her your unconditional love?

Whatever mistakes you made, they were made with the best information, knowledge and skills you had at that time. Have you grown a bit since then? Learned a few things? Wouldn't make the same mistakes today? Good! You've grown!

Now write a letter to that girl, or younger woman, and tell her that you forgive her. Treat her with the compassion and love you would give your own child. Hopefully you can see her, yourself, with more loving eyes. Keep the letter for a little while. If the ugly voice of regret rears up, take the letter out and read it again. You deserve to forgive yourself. Continuing to punish yourself for things you cannot change helps NO ONE.  Forgive and concentrate on making the best decisions you can today.  It's all you can do.

Quoting Mabuka:

i have a difficult time forgiving myself for mistakes I have made in the past - especially the mistakes that still affect me every day. How can I overcome my regrets and move on with my life?


by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 10:41 AM
I would like to learn how to be happy with myself. Im not happy about my looks my body my weight, my confidence is really low. It comes between my husband and I. I never feel pretty or sexy.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 4:35 PM

I thank I wold be happyer  if I was not depressed or had ,OCD,or Hypoglycemia + some : (

how can you be happeyer when your mind never stops 

by Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 9:11 PM

my husband is what stands between along with ppl and there many opinions along with the facts of i would have no where to live, etc and i have 3 children along with prego with the 4th

by New Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 10:19 PM

I think the fact that I am not able to find a job is what is standing in my way of happiness

by on Mar. 9, 2013 at 11:05 AM

How to make more $$$ so I can make it on my own without having an angry husband around? 

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