I was wondering at what point we should cut this off.
First a little backround story: My fiance has primary custody of his 3-year-old daughter (4 next month). She spends 9 days a month with her mother and at least one weekend a month with her maternal grandmother. They all share a room and/or bed with her at night. To my knowledge, she has never slept in a room by herself in her life.
When my fiance took custody, we put her in her own room. This went well for a while until she wasn't with us for a week. (My fiance works a second shift job and I caught the flu so she stayed with her aunt until I was well enough to take care of her.) When my step-daughter came back, she refused to stay in her own room. We ended up putting her bed in our room and slowly weened her back into her own room. First, we'd have her fall asleep in our bed until it was our bedtime then moved her into her own bed. Then we had her fall asleep in her own bed and stayed with her until she fell asleep. Then we put her in her own bed and let her fall asleep on her own.
Now her bed is back in her own room. She gives us problems with falling and staying asleep and is now looking for any reason for us to get out of our room and see her (i.e. telling us she needs to use the bathroom when she doesn't).
I was just wondering at point it's not okay for her to be in a bedroom with us anymore. I've heard other people saying that it can by psychology damaging or she'll never learn to be "independent" and stuff like that if she stays in our room. Is this true?