See what CafeMoms are saying about saving time this holiday season..
Hello... this is my first post here... I'm divorced, two kids, ages 7 and 5. My ex-spouse, the children's biological mother, has primary custody. I am the kids' other mom. She has always been obsessed with bedtime and sleep, since the kids were very young. She is insisting that the kids need to be in bed at 6 PM. 6 PM!!! Even with the recent time change. Insists that they both need naps on the weekend. She makes them wear sleep masks to bed, and my 7-year old reports that sometimes, at bedtime, she's come into the room, turned the light on, and done work on her laptop, I guess to force my daughter to get used to wearing the sleep mask. She's put "sleep posters" they made in their rooms to, I don't know what, remind them that they need sleep, I guess.
We do not use sleep masks here, nor do we have sleep posters, and their bedtime when they are with me starts at 7... by the time we're done with bedtime routine, it's around 8. I feel like having them up there at 7 is even on the early side. They get up around 6, which I wish was later, but I don't see much evidence that they're overtired when they are with me. I asked her what time the kids are asleep if they go to bed at 6, and she says 6:10. To say I am skeptical about that is an insult to skepticism.
We have the kids both in play therapy due to some adjustments to our alternative family situation, and both play therapists are aware of this bedtime, but I haven't heard much from them on it other than "I have never heard of a child with such an early bedtime." The kids have no medical problems. I don't think this is because she wants time for herself... I think she honestly believes this is the best thing for the kids.
Bedtime has been a constant battle between the two of us... my refusal to put my kids to bed at a time when every other family in the United States is sitting down to dinner is a huge source of argument, and that tension between us makes its way down to the kids, no matter how hard we try to avoid it.
Sorry for a close to tl;dr first post, but I'm at my wits' end with this. My ex will do what she is going to do, and there's not much I can do about it, unless it rises to the level of abuse, and I don't think that this does. Although the laptop thing is concerning. Any thoughts?