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i just started a new relationship about 2 months ago things are good and we are very happy together. but i just miscarried his baby. i wasn't far along and we had no clue i was pregnant.

we have talked about having kids and we both agreed we wanted to wait a year or so.

so my question is should i tell him i miscarried?? i waited til he went to work the other day and went to the ER where they told me it was a miscarriage. i am very upset although i didn't want another baby right now...im still very hurt...WWYD???
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by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 2:45 AM
Replies (11-20):
jean_marie1987
by Bronze Member on Mar. 19, 2013 at 9:35 AM

 I agree.

Quoting Zazayam:

Well in that case I would get on a different type, since yours apparently doesn't work.

I am sorry for your loss by the way, even if you didn't know before hand I know it can be hard. I would tell him and hopefully he can be support if you need it.

Quoting LilDzMamma2010:

i am on BC.

Quoting Zazayam:

I would tell him, and get on some form of birth control.


 

belindah
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 10:30 AM
1 mom liked this

 Do ahead and tell him, you do not want to start hiding things from him this early on in the relationship.  This could become a trust issue if not handled probably

terpmama
by Bronze Member on Mar. 19, 2013 at 10:44 AM
3 moms liked this

Why are you having sex with someone you don't trust to comfort you? Why wouldn't you tell him? 

Raeann11
by Member on Mar. 19, 2013 at 10:47 AM

I'm sorry for you loss. Yes I would tell him. He should be there for emotional support and whatever you need to help get through your loss.

kali_mom
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 10:56 AM
Sorry to hear you have suffered a loss. If it were me I would immediately tell him and get on a 2nd and 3rd back up method. You have known this person a brief amount of time and already you question if you should tell him. Sounds like you may need to SLOW down and enjoy the baby(ies) you have and let this relationship grow. No more babies for now is what I would suggest.
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LindaClement
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 11:40 AM

This was kind of what I was thinking: hiding medical symptoms until he left the building is a very strange way to be practicing 'intimacy.'

Quoting terpmama:

Why are you having sex with someone you don't trust to comfort you? Why wouldn't you tell him? 


la_bella_vita
by Gold Member on Mar. 19, 2013 at 12:02 PM

 Yes, I would tell him.

hap23
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 12:14 PM

I'm sorry for your loss. I would tell him. Like a lot of what eveyone else is saying you should be able to depend on each other emotionaly. Though I have never been through it myself, I have know others who have, and I image that he will know that something is wrong. Plus it will help you both to take more caution in the futrue, and be able to plan better for when you do want a child.

CryMAd
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 12:33 PM

I understand what your saying...  My ex-husband was mentally and verbally abusive, so know I question everything I do in my current relationship because I remember how he would have acted...

My current guy is AMAZING!!!  He understands that I had bad past experiances and reminds me that he loves me and there is nothing I can say or do that will change that.

That said, yes you should tell him.  It was his loss too, and he should have the right to morn his baby.  Plus, if you plan on staying with him for long-term you don't want to start off keeping secrets from him...  Eventually it might come out, and years from now he may wonder why you would keep it from him in the first place.

Now you can tell him that you were scared, you were suffering a loss and didn't wanna cause him unnecessary pain.

Good luck, I'm so sorry for your loss!!!

mama2my2boys
by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 12:38 PM
1 mom liked this
so you knew u were pregnant?? i mean u went to the er becuase u were bleeding? and why didnt you say something to him like (something isnt right with my body, im headed to the er when u leave for work)....and yes you need to tell him...and he prob will question why u didnt tell him when u went
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