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Baby number three-shower or no shower? Small Edit!

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Okay, Im fed up trying to plan this and I need help. Im having my third baby, my first girl. My boys will be five and two when this baby arrives this summer. I need literally nothing but a bath tub, diapers, and girls' clothes because I have everything else. With my first, we did the requisite full shower. My second we did a 'sprinkle' because I think every baby deserves to be celebrated and the only thing I registered for were little toys-for some reason my first born didnt have many of those-and some wash cloths, maybe clothes, I dont even remember now but not a single big thing because I kept everything from the first and it was all neutral. Now to number three, same goes-all neutral, kept it all, blah blah. My mother was orignally planning a diaper shower where everyone is invited and just asked to bring a package of diapers. I was okay with this, my sisterinlaw did this with her third in as many years. Now we know it's a girl and shes thinking bigger than just a diaper shower.
I need opinions on this-specifically is it 'acceptable' to have a bigger shower because this is the first girl, shold I make a registry if I do have one, or is it tacky to have a bigger shower at all-because Im tired of searching for 'themes'-not one Ive seen appeals to me-and if I agree and leave it up to her, I'll end up with this stupid girly shower full of lace and ribbons and pink-all of which are so NOT me. HELP!

To clarify-Im not planning my own shower, bad phrasing above on my part! (if there is one) I was trying to decide on a theme-or lack thereof. Once Ive done that part, my mother and my friend are taking over. I agree it's tacky to host your own shower. Thank you everyone for your advice and opinions!

by on Mar. 19, 2013 at 10:15 PM
Replies (21-30):
by Bronze Member on Mar. 20, 2013 at 2:54 PM
1 mom liked this

I had a big shower for my 3rd, who was my first girl.   Everyone was excited about her coming and wanted to celebrate!    I got a lot of clouthes... and a bathtub!

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by Bronze Member on Mar. 20, 2013 at 3:48 PM

It really is how you feel about it. It is different every where and with everyone one. Where I am it is ok to have another shower for the optisite sex. If not then you don't have one.

by on Mar. 20, 2013 at 6:25 PM

My friends threw a suprise shower for my first son who is now 12. Then my other good friend threw on for my second son who is now 1 1/2, and my friend who threw my first one tried to do another surprise one for my soon to come girl. I didn't want it and it seems a bit excessive, but whatever, I'll go along with it. Except they couldn't keep their mouth shut so I now know all the details and most of the guest list as well. I guess I didn't have a choice. Had I had a choice I would have like a diaper shower just to get together and celebrate the baby.

by on Mar. 20, 2013 at 8:10 PM

Shower! Go all the way! Have fun, enjoy and embrace the feminine side of babies! The clothing is so much MORE  FUN AND ADORABLE. The fashion accessories

by Ruby Member on Mar. 20, 2013 at 8:29 PM
They can be celebrated without gifts.

Quoting Pukalani79:

 Why not have a shower? Every child deserves to be celebrated :)

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by Mom2boys on Mar. 20, 2013 at 11:14 PM

I had 2 boys 6.5 years apart.  My in laws threw a suprise small baby shower.  People bought clothes and diapers. We bought everything pretty much needed for the baby. I did not expect a shower nor did I really want one.

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by Bronze Member on Mar. 20, 2013 at 11:16 PM
I like this idea:).

Quoting AM-BRAT:

I think baby celebrations are fine. But if really all you need us a tub, (which we all know we don't lol) then buy one and have a baby party but no expectations. :)

I would make mention like, you have baby stuff but cute outfits welcome as it's girl.
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by on Mar. 21, 2013 at 7:47 AM
If you are uncomfortable "asking" for gifts, just have a party to celebrate your little girl.
A sprinkle will work too...if you want to get etiquette specific, I was always under the impression it is acceptable to have another shower if there are 5 years between babies or if the baby is of the opposite with a little girl it's perfectly ok.
I think it is perfectly ok to have a party. You could always just not say anything about gifts. If guests ask, your family can say you're not registered because you really don't need anything, but you wouldn't turn down some little girl clothes.
I'm pregnant with our #2. This one's due date is one month before my DS turns 5. We didn't fin out the gender ahead of them with FS and we're planning the same this time. We have a decent amout of gender neutral stuff, but after 5 years we have a LOT that is either just worn out or out-of-date (safety mainly), or just broken. I feel weird about another shower but we could actually use one with all the stuff we have to replace.
by Barb on Mar. 21, 2013 at 8:30 AM
1 mom liked this

Thank you for the edit. My feelings are, and they may or may not be proper ettiquette, that showers are a social time- a time for women (and sometimes men also) to get together and laugh and talk about pregnancy and children and enjoy one another's company. Showers for children after the first are easiest done like a diaper shower where people may not know what is needed but diapers always are, but if a general shower and the people are able to enjoy shopping for little baby things, then the shower is a pleasure for all- and never should be considered a place to stock up on baby furniture and so forth.

by Member on Mar. 21, 2013 at 8:34 AM
3 moms liked this

I've never ran into an issue with baby showers, and I've been to a ton of baby showers for all manner of birth order (first baby, sixth baby, etc).  Usually the dads are having a diaper shower with their boys at the same time as mom having a baby shower with her girls.  No one has ever complained.  I know there's an etiquette to all of this, but I don't think anybody really abides by it anymore.

Every baby is a blessing and deserves to be celebrated.  If someone thinks it's tacky and doesn't want to bring a gift, well, gifts are not mandatory.

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