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Am I a total douche? :(

Posted by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 6:03 PM
  • 25 Replies
My husband and I just moved in to a new, much bigger, much nicer house with our 4 kiddo's and my best friend. My husband and I put down the deposit and pay the rent as well as bills. My best friends car crapped out so for now he is using our vehicle to get back and forth to work. He doesn't pay bills or anything (right now), but he does help us out with the youngin's if we need to do something.
Everything is fine and dandy except that when we brought him with to show him the house the day we signed the lease he 'called dibs' on an unfinished room upstairs. I had originally planned on my husband and I using that room once it was finished, but hadn't specifically said that, other than 'since that room is unfinished this [the other upstairs room] is is where we're putting our bed.' My friend has a fouton that he currently sleeps on in part of the living room. I know this may not seem like a big deal, but the other room is close to being finished and I really wanted it for my own......Am I going to be a total douche if I tell him that once it is done my husband and I want to move our stuff in there and he can have our old room? :(
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by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 6:03 PM
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Replies (1-10):
OliviaW.
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 6:07 PM
1 mom liked this
No. If you're paying the bills it's you rules.
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frndlyfn
by Platinum Member on Mar. 23, 2013 at 6:25 PM

Your rules, your house.  He should go wherever you tell him is free space.   I would be making him pay rent at least to help with finances.  It seems he really is not contributing positive things to your family.

Dcn2010
by Member on Mar. 23, 2013 at 6:28 PM

It may cause some drama but you pay the bills, you get dibs no matter what. 

brittany208
by Bronze Member on Mar. 23, 2013 at 8:23 PM
2 moms liked this

I would have told him upfront when he "called dibs"...not waited til now. If you're paying everything, then he's a guest in YOUR house.

MamaSnaps
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 8:30 PM

Talk it out. Otherwise it's going to be ugly. If you can't resolve? I don't know what to tell you. I'd say as long as you're paying the bills you get the choice. 

jrmo4
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 8:51 PM
Yeah, I probably should have, and I'm really not trying to be a dick about the situation. I mean, it's not an end of the world problem, which makes it hard to want to bring it up and sound petty. We're all pretty mellow people and it certainly wouldn't cause an argument/fight, but I really hate hurting people's feelings. @_@


Quoting brittany208:

I would have told him upfront when he "called dibs"...not waited til now. If you're paying everything, then he's a guest in YOUR house.


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jrmo4
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 8:55 PM
I was getting geared up to figure out what to say when he checked out what the remodler had completed today and he says "I was hoping he wasn't going to paint the walls so I could paint them blue." I'm just like....auch! dude! you can't just paint a rental houses walls willy nilly.... and it's back to the drawing board where I can either find my balls or just let it go. >__
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slransde
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 8:56 PM
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"dibs" means nothing in the adult world
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Momma2013
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 9:01 PM
Why is he living with you? Like is it a permanent situation or just you guys helping each other out for a while? If its suppose to be his house too then i say talk it out. If its YOUR house explain that you want that room and hes only temporary. Why move your stuff after he moves if you can move it now?
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Amybelle
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 9:03 PM

yup





=-/

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