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Advice for Moms Advice for Moms

Moms transitioning from career to SAHM

Posted by on Mar. 30, 2013 at 9:16 PM
  • 19 Replies

I really want to be home with my kids (2 and 4) full time. The problem is that we have debt we're working on paying off and we've become accustomed to my income-- I make good money and it more than covers our childcare expenses...its about 40% of our household income. Have any of you made the transition? What did you do to prepare? Have you found a way to keep your foot in the door somewhere (my current employer will not be interested in that arrangement)? Or if you've continued working FT what have you done to be more available for your family? At the end of my days I have nothing left. Thanks in advance for your advice!

by on Mar. 30, 2013 at 9:16 PM
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Replies (1-10):
DeLaLi
by Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 9:40 PM
Nine months ago I quit to stay with my daighter, who is now only 18 months. It was much easier for me because I made less than DH, I had minimal debt that I took care of right away, I did plan and save for about nine months prior to quitting and lastly I only paid for two bills that DH had no issue taking over. We were always pretty good with finances. I just had to physically and mentally adjust to staying home with DD.

If I was full fledge in a career making a lot more money I would have thought twice about quitting, even though I feel staying with your child is more important if you can financially handle it. My job really wasn't my career path, although it was ok and satisfying.
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atlmom2
by Ruby Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 10:01 PM
I didn't quit till dh got a raise that was equal to my salary after taxes and after daycare. Hard to stay home at first. Been 20 years this week. Glad I did it.
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bmcandmmh
by on Mar. 30, 2013 at 10:02 PM
Don't do it! You'll be sorry! It may be fun for awhile then you start feeling bad like you're not contributing and being with the kids 24/7 gets on your nerves!
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Kellileanne
by Bronze Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 10:04 PM

My husband makes enough to cover the bills plus some so I was able to stay home.  I will go back to work later this summer/early fall.

SexyTeacher
by Gold Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 10:10 PM

When I did this (with ex) we saved every penny of my income for 6 months. Everything came out of his check. Once we saw we could do it on his income I quit work. We also had money in the bank from my paychecks. Maybe your family can try this.

BTW, this arrangement lasted for 8 months. I was going crazy! I went back to work and we were all happier!

selamberto
by on Mar. 30, 2013 at 10:41 PM

Thanks everyone! I do worry about the possibility that being SAHM may not be all its cracked up to be, but I can't continue the way things are now. My kids need their mommy to be engaged and spend time with them....not brain dead and ready to pass out. I do think I appreciate my time with them more b/c I work though. Maybe I just need to figure out a change that would make my job less demanding. Easier said than done :)

LABELmeCUTE
by Bronze Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 10:49 PM
When my husband passed away last year I thought about it, I was pregnant plus I had my 2DD's plus my SD to take care of, I had planned on starting my own business,& opening up a boutique like I had always planned,but after being on maternity leave for a few months I knew it wouldn't work for us, we're all soo busy,and I love to work,soo there it is.... However I still plan on opening up my own boutique
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sabrtooth1
by on Mar. 31, 2013 at 1:25 AM

I have worked my entire life, since I was 13 and babysitting.  I could not conceive of sitting on my rear and having someone else support me.  Marriage is a partnership.  You are NOT more entitled to stay home than your husband is, just because you have a vagina.

SewingMamaLele
by Bronze Member on Mar. 31, 2013 at 1:33 AM
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In what universe is staying home to parent involve sitting on your rear end all day?

Quoting sabrtooth1:

I have worked my entire life, since I was 13 and babysitting.  I could not conceive of sitting on my rear and having someone else support me.  Marriage is a partnership.  You are NOT more entitled to stay home than your husband is, just because you have a vagina.

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SewingMamaLele
by Bronze Member on Mar. 31, 2013 at 1:41 AM
1 mom liked this
Op: add up all of your work expenses... Daycare, lunches, gas, work clothes. Check if you will drop a tax bracket. Compare to your take home income and ask if you can get by... Or if you can potentially work part time or from home to make up the difference.

Staying home isn't easy. It's mentally, and emotionally draining, and often exhausting. It's an adjustment, you have to learn to deal with the challenges and.remember why you're doing it... And be sure to take time for yourself.
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