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A question for all you moms who don't spank, yet have disciplined kids

Posted by on Apr. 6, 2013 at 12:12 PM
  • 281 Replies
3 moms liked this
How do you do it?

My 3 yo is driving me insane. I'm a wreck. Everytime I look at her I want to cry. I don't know the first thing about discipline, but I know I don't want to spank and no one supports my decision.
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by on Apr. 6, 2013 at 12:12 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MrsApple
by Bronze Member on Apr. 6, 2013 at 12:17 PM
7 moms liked this

We've always used time outs with our daughter and it works wonderfully.Basically we do it like the 1-2-3 Magic technique.Our daughter is 6 now and I can't remember the last time she was put in time out.We're always complemented on how well behaved she is.

veganistic
by on Apr. 6, 2013 at 12:21 PM
4 moms liked this
Im reading 123 magic now and i think its fantastic. Im trying to get my mostly well behaved but mouthy and for lack of a better word, lazy, 8 year old on track. I ordered it on amazon and i totally recommend!
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veganistic
by on Apr. 6, 2013 at 12:23 PM
1 mom liked this
(Literally - I'm reading it now and came on CM to see if therewas a 123magic group, lol)
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atlmom2
by Ruby Member on Apr. 6, 2013 at 12:27 PM
16 moms liked this
Very consistant discipline. Like Supernanny says. Don't let them get away with anything.
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mommysangelface
by on Apr. 6, 2013 at 12:30 PM
7 moms liked this

i use the penny system. 

3 pennies in a cup. 3 strikes and a penny is taken away. 

my son gets the pennies back at bedtime. 

he can earn more pennies by being extra good, picking up without being told. etc etc

Lindalou907
by Silver Member on Apr. 6, 2013 at 1:01 PM
2 moms liked this

Time outs work if you are VERY consistant. Give her only 1 warning, or count to three, and if she doesn't straighten up put her in a corner or very boring time out spot for 3 minutes. You can still do it if you're out in public. If she cries, ignore it. If she gets up and walks away put her back and make her stay. She WILL learn if you do it EVERY time. And make sure all her caregivers and babysitters do too.

_AshlynNicole
by on Apr. 6, 2013 at 1:03 PM
1 mom liked this
I've tried and she starts hitting, kicking, and flopping around like a fish.

Quoting Lindalou907:

Time outs work if you are VERY consistant. Give her only 1 warning, or count to three, and if she doesn't straighten up put her in a corner or very boring time out spot for 3 minutes. You can still do it if you're out in public. If she cries, ignore it. If she gets up and walks away put her back and make her stay. She WILL learn if you do it EVERY time. And make sure all her caregivers and babysitters do too.

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Bubandrorysmom
by on Apr. 6, 2013 at 1:19 PM
4 moms liked this

i would say if you like him dr phil has a lot of techniques on his web site that are helpful..if you dont like him thats fine to, anyway he say find your childs currency(that means what she likes the most) and work with that for my son who is almost 8 it is video games, he knows if he is bad that will be the first thing to go. also i do use time outs on my son and i agree with the other moms they do work if you stick to it. and i noticed you said she flops around and kicks and stuff..if it gets that bad maybe you should put her in her room and let her have her melt down and then when she is calmed down for a few minuets try talking to her after that sometimes my son does have these days and he just needs some time alone to have his little melt downs and then when the energy is out he seems to feel alot better, i havent heard of 123 magic but now im gonna google it lol seems intresting :)..i hope this helps you and p.s who cares if other people dont like the fact you dont spank your kid, i have heard all that myself just let it slide off your back you are the mom and you know whats best for your child ..good luck :)

Lindalou907
by Silver Member on Apr. 6, 2013 at 1:19 PM
3 moms liked this

I would smack her butt, but if you don't want to spank, I respect that, just hold her down. Kids need limits, she really does want to know what the rules are and what the consequenses are for breaking them. She is "strong willed" which can be very difficult, but you have to be stronger or she will get into all kinds of trouble as a teenager!



Quoting _AshlynNicole:

I've tried and she starts hitting, kicking, and flopping around like a fish.

Quoting Lindalou907:

Time outs work if you are VERY consistant. Give her only 1 warning, or count to three, and if she doesn't straighten up put her in a corner or very boring time out spot for 3 minutes. You can still do it if you're out in public. If she cries, ignore it. If she gets up and walks away put her back and make her stay. She WILL learn if you do it EVERY time. And make sure all her caregivers and babysitters do too.



5PointedHuman
by on Apr. 6, 2013 at 1:24 PM
5 moms liked this

I ask politely once, firmly tell once, and then it's corner time. I don't speak until I have eye contact either. When my son is getting out of hand, I'll ask him if he's proud of himself right now. The answer is always 'no', if he's acting up, and we then discuss how he can be a better leader for his younger sister.

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