Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Met new man im falling for dont know what to do

Posted by   + Show Post
I'm a single mom of a 7mnth old.. Me and my x (baby daddy) have been split for 6 months now... Ive resently started seeing this new guy who im starting to fall for.. We agreed to take it slow to get to know each other he just resently got out of a long relationship as well ands now wanting to get his heart broke again... Anyways.. We've been seeing each other for bout a month now and hes great my family loves him.. He had no problem with my son and hes so sweet and amazing... It scares me I'm falling for him I don't know what to do cause I don't wana get hurt eather.... He tells me he likes me can see us being together but just wants to take it slow.. I was fine with it at first now I want more I really like him an d I guess I'm scared hell slip away... Someone please tell me what I should do.. sorry its so long
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Apr. 17, 2013 at 12:13 AM
Replies (21-30):
AM-BRAT
by Amber on Apr. 17, 2013 at 4:23 PM
I guess whatever works for you. I know anything can happen.

I'd be wary of a dude that was hot on a chick with some other dude's spawn dresh out the vag though. I'll ask my dh if he would like that...
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
AM-BRAT
by Amber on Apr. 17, 2013 at 5:00 PM
I just texted him and awaiting an answer. Where did you meet this guy?


Quoting AM-BRAT:

I guess whatever works for you. I know anything can happen.



I'd be wary of a dude that was hot on a chick with some other dude's spawn dresh out the vag though. I'll ask my dh if he would like that...

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
nuts4scouts
by Bronze Member on Apr. 17, 2013 at 5:01 PM
1 mom liked this


Quoting newmama93:

Someone please tell me what I should do.


You say this, but you don't really mean it.

Like many on here, all you really want to hear is - only what you want to hear. That is that you are right. That what you are doing is fine and dandy. You want a pat on the head, and to be told that everything is, and will be, perfectly wonderful..

You sure as heck do NOT want to hear anyone who might disagree with you.

You "like" it when folks who disagree with what you are doing are called "judgmental".

Well, sorry, but YOU asked -

You state that BOTH you AND him  want to "take it slow".  What - exactly - is your definition of "slow"? What is his definition of "slow"? 

You have been "seeing each other" for about 1 month. That is just 3-4 weeks of taking it "slow". Yet -  in those 3-4 weeks - he has bonded with your 7 month old baby, met your family, texts/calls you every day, has had sex with you on numerous occasions, and states he does not want to see any other girl but you.

It seems to me that your, and his, definition of "slow" is really 600 miles per hour fast!

You want to know what you should do?

Back off !!! 

Stop having sex with this guy first off.

Dial this whole thing way back down. This was nowhere near slow from day one. You barely know this guy. Yet you immediately bring him into your family, into your child's life, and into your bed.

Go on dates in public places. TALK to him about his life, his family, his likes, and dislikes.

Stop taking your baby with you everywhere you go. It is WAY to soon to force your son to bond with this guy. You have family nearby (this guy has already met them). Ask your family to babysit when you go out with him.

Meet his family, and his friends.

Get to REALLY know him before you even CONSIDER bringing him further into your child's life, or becoming intimate with him again. 

AM-BRAT
by Amber on Apr. 17, 2013 at 5:23 PM
Like like like!

Btw I asked dh and he refused to answer lol but it's pretty much weird for a dude to be obsessed with you and your baby after a month. Jmo though. You could end up proving us all wrong!


Quoting nuts4scouts:


Quoting newmama93:

Someone please tell me what I should do.


You say this, but you don't really mean it.

Like many on here, all you really want to hear is - only what you want to hear. That is that you are right. That what you are doing is fine and dandy. You want a pat on the head, and to be told that everything is, and will be, perfectly wonderful..

You sure as heck do NOT want to hear anyone who might disagree with you.

You "like" it when folks who disagree with what you are doing are called "judgmental".

Well, sorry, but YOU asked -

You state that BOTH you AND him  want to "take it slow".  What - exactly - is your definition of "slow"? What is his definition of "slow"? 

You have been "seeing each other" for about 1 month. That is just 3-4 weeks of taking it "slow". Yet -  in those 3-4 weeks - he has bonded with your 7 month old baby, met your family, texts/calls you every day, has had sex with you on numerous occasions, and states he does not want to see any other girl but you.

It seems to me that your, and his, definition of "slow" is really 600 miles per hour fast!

You want to know what you should do?

Back off !!! 

Stop having sex with this guy first off.

Dial this whole thing way back down. This was nowhere near slow from day one. You barely know this guy. Yet you immediately bring him into your family, into your child's life, and into your bed.

Go on dates in public places. TALK to him about his life, his family, his likes, and dislikes.

Stop taking your baby with you everywhere you go. It is WAY to soon to force your son to bond with this guy. You have family nearby (this guy has already met them). Ask your family to babysit when you go out with him.

Meet his family, and his friends.

Get to REALLY know him before you even CONSIDER bringing him further into your child's life, or becoming intimate with him again. 


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
sdbcoach
by Member on Apr. 17, 2013 at 6:26 PM
1 mom liked this

If he's right for you, you can't "lose" him. Take your time. To get to know someone past the "perfect" beginning takes patience & time. Enjoy the journey. Why did your x leave? When the baby was 1 month old. Did you love him? Do a Dr. Phil - examine what was wrong with the last relationship and your responsibility in it so you don't repeat the same mistakes. Good luck.

Karen_S
by Member on Apr. 17, 2013 at 7:15 PM
1 mom liked this

"He tells me he likes me can see us being together but just wants to take it slow.. I was fine with it at first now I want more I really like him an d I guess I'm scared hell slip away"

He's telling you what he wants from you.  Listen.  That's basic communication.  If you push him, you are much more likely to drive him away than if you give him the time he has asked for.  

newmama93
by on Apr. 17, 2013 at 8:56 PM
I had to leave him he had a bad temper b4 we had him.and I told him.is he lost it when he was born I was gana leave him.well he lost it busted my windsheild and broke other things on the car while me and my son were in.car.. I couldn't risk him harming my son or scaring him.... Thats y we split and thank you for the edvice


Quoting sdbcoach:

If he's right for you, you can't "lose" him. Take your time. To get to know someone past the "perfect" beginning takes patience & time. Enjoy the journey. Why did your x leave? When the baby was 1 month old. Did you love him? Do a Dr. Phil - examine what was wrong with the last relationship and your responsibility in it so you don't repeat the same mistakes. Good luck.


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
zboys
by Member on Apr. 17, 2013 at 10:48 PM

Having sex with this man is not taking it slowly. 

Lillysmommy0113
by on Apr. 17, 2013 at 11:35 PM

this!

Quoting nuts4scouts:


Quoting newmama93:

Someone please tell me what I should do.


You say this, but you don't really mean it.

Like many on here, all you really want to hear is - only what you want to hear. That is that you are right. That what you are doing is fine and dandy. You want a pat on the head, and to be told that everything is, and will be, perfectly wonderful..

You sure as heck do NOT want to hear anyone who might disagree with you.

You "like" it when folks who disagree with what you are doing are called "judgmental".

Well, sorry, but YOU asked -

You state that BOTH you AND him  want to "take it slow".  What - exactly - is your definition of "slow"? What is his definition of "slow"? 

You have been "seeing each other" for about 1 month. That is just 3-4 weeks of taking it "slow". Yet -  in those 3-4 weeks - he has bonded with your 7 month old baby, met your family, texts/calls you every day, has had sex with you on numerous occasions, and states he does not want to see any other girl but you.

It seems to me that your, and his, definition of "slow" is really 600 miles per hour fast!

You want to know what you should do?

Back off !!! 

Stop having sex with this guy first off.

Dial this whole thing way back down. This was nowhere near slow from day one. You barely know this guy. Yet you immediately bring him into your family, into your child's life, and into your bed.

Go on dates in public places. TALK to him about his life, his family, his likes, and dislikes.

Stop taking your baby with you everywhere you go. It is WAY to soon to force your son to bond with this guy. You have family nearby (this guy has already met them). Ask your family to babysit when you go out with him.

Meet his family, and his friends.

Get to REALLY know him before you even CONSIDER bringing him further into your child's life, or becoming intimate with him again. 


grannywilson
by Member on Apr. 18, 2013 at 12:23 AM

If everything is so wonderful how would telling him you love him scare him away?  It is impossible to know all about each other in three or four weeks.  Does he have a temper?  Will he be faithful?   How many relationships has he had?

Why the breakups?  I think everyone is all for love and seeing a single woman happy.  You have already had one failure.  You can "take it  slow" and not have sex.  If he won't stay around because of that then he is not as wonderful as you think. What does "Taking it slow mean to him?"

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)



Featured