36 weeks pregnant and he said it's not working...:(
I am currently 36 weeks pregnant with my son. I am 16 and the father is 19. We have been together for three years. I live with my parents, and he lives an hour and a half away. He has a full time job so I don't see him much anymore.
I used to go to his house for weeks at a time, but when I got pregnant my parents stopped that completely. I am only allowed over there for at the most two days at a time, maybe once a month. They are 100% supportive of this pregnancy.
Lately Alex (the father) and I have been having issues. He wants me to move in with him so that he can be by his son and see him when he wants. I've tried to explain to him that that isn't possible until I turn 18 next year. This little fight has been going on my whole pregnancy. He said if I can't move in with him then I should be at least able to stay over a little more. I agree and I get where he is coming from, but I can not do anything about it.
We have been trying to figure out what we want to do in our relationship.
Well about three days ago was our anniversary. He was off of work for once and came to see me so I got all ready. He took me to the park and sat in the car and said " I don't think it's working anymore. " My heart dropped. We have talked about this so many times but we never came right out and said it. When I asked why he said " I never see you, and it doesn't feel like were in a relationship if I can't see you. I want to be able to see my son"
I understand completely and then he said that he wants to stay together and try to make this work at least until the baby comes. He said he wants to see if things change when the baby comes.. Meaning he wants to see if my parents will let me go to his house more.
I have no idea what they are going to do or not do. It breaks my heart that he is basing our relationship off of something that I can't control. I have told him this multiple times. It's just so frustrating.
I told him if we were going to break up then I would rather do it now, then when the baby comes. Whats the point in staying together for another 5 weeks? He said no he wants to see if things change because he wants things to work.
Then on the way home he said if we did break up he would more then likely try to get half custody. I am kind of okay with that, but I know my parents would not let that fly no matter what. They would fight it and it would turn into a custody battle and whatever "friends" we were befor would be lost. I want to at least be on good terms if we break up.
But in no way would I go down without a fight. This is my son. I carried him for 9 months and I am breastfeeding. I am not just going to hand him over. He works almost all the time anyway so I don't see how that would work in his favor.
I've been trying to get unattached to him, and just focus on Zander and I. Because in the end he is basing our relationship off of something out of my control..
I don't understand why they put a limit on the time I spend with him now either. But we are super close, and my parents think I can do better without him. They gave him the choice to move in with us, but he has afull time job out by his house. No, they will not let me move out. There is no emancipation in my state either. I have to do what they say until I am 18.. :/ I do not agree with the half custody thing because for one he works all the time, so Zander would be in child care or something anyway. And two when he said that he also said "So I don't have to pay child support" which is really messed up. I am on public assistnace and they automatically register child support if you are not married, but on assistant.