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I have seen families that make less money than we do and can afford higher rents and have leftover money to get nails done, massages, vacations, hair cuts, etc. We are scraping by check to check. My clothes have holes in them, I cut my own hair, I dont get nails done, I have nothing, we cant afford to go anywhere. Yet, I am told by people we make too much money for any kind of help. I cant even afford preschool for my kids. I talked to DH about it and he said I have to live that way to find out. I want to know so I can take all this "Extra" money we supposedly have and use it to send my daughter to preschool. I dont understand!!
by on Apr. 20, 2013 at 6:03 PM
Replies (51-60):
jojo_star
by on Apr. 24, 2013 at 5:58 PM

We are upper middle class, money is no worry for us, I don't know how other families do it. 

spotsmom
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 1:46 AM

The only explanation must be your debt to income ratio. Their's is lower. 

momofsunshine77
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 8:12 AM
we dont have "debt", but our outs are more than our ins. I already know that. My question is how.
Quoting spotsmom:

The only explanation must be your debt to income ratio. Their's is lower. 


heidi749
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 9:05 AM

I agree with you.

 OP , I have a garden and OH MY SHits you would not believe the amount of rock that came out of there and the amount of work involved in actually getting it done, there was actually a fire pit in part of that area before we put the garden in .  There was some pretty big ass boulders in there as well, we moved the fire pit too, so it has them all around it now. So you are making excuses as to why you can not do a garden, trust me I was not a green thumb by any means before I started the garden,but you read about it and self teach yourself , it does take allot of work to keep it up, but it is so worth it.

 I am not on PA never have been, have great insurance threw SO's work, SO and I do not live paycheck to pay check. We aslo do not have a brand new car that we make payments on, we have a mortgage , and  no credit card payments to make, I have the cheapist cell plan, he has the second cheapiest plan, but his work pays for his, we get unlimited long distance plan on the home phone, my family is far. We also save money by doing the garden, I also buy in bulk stuff like bathroom supplies, laundry stuff & cleaning supplies, I also buy meats and breads in bulk, since they can be frozen. 

 It comes down to how hard you are willing to work in life,to be able to have all you actually want in life IMHO.

Quoting MamaSnaps:

Easy was your response to building a garden-you had every excuse why  you can't do it-which boils down to it's not easy to do where you are at. 

I didn't say save thousands on car insurance. I said $100 per 6th  month period on your car insurance by not being forced to carry full coverage because of having a car payment. The thousands comes in from the actual car payment. 

There is some variation of prices across the country for many many things. Where one thing may be more expensive for you because it has to be shipped in another will be cheaper. It really does equal out quite a bit across the board. I looked in my freezer and on the hamburger package from this month I paid $4.59 per pound (in bulk) for hamburger so we are really very close in price. I know if I spent almost $1300 a month on groceries we'd be eating steak and not hamburger! 

Would you be willing to share exactly what is on your last grocery receipt? That may explain whatever it is we are all missing here. 


 

Quoting momofsunshine77:

I dont have easy, so I dont know where that is coming from. I make my life any harder than it i sI will never sleep - literally. I am not making excuses. I do make meals from scratch and meal plan. Things cost more here I am assuming. I remember one time talking to my MIL and we were discussing ground beef. She said it was like 2.50 a pound by her I looked at our label and it was 5.49 a pound. Go figure. She lives in a totally different state. Like I said before I have gone to budget couselors and this is it. As far as the car goes I dont understand your math. My isurance is 530 for 6 MONTHS for both cars which is about 85 a month for BOTH cars. So dropping coverage on one wil not save me thousands of dollars cuz I am not even spending that much a year on BOTH.
Quoting MamaSnaps:

I am not being rude here. I really really promise!!! You have excuses for everything. If you WANTED it you would do it. The money is there so you spend it instead of doing what may not be easy. Easy is REALLY expensive. A little research and self education and you CAN do it. 

I want to mention something else you said and give you my theory on it: Your vehicle-you have a payment on it. Car payments are a huge huge huge money pit. You have a car payment of $330 and insurance is $530 every 6 months. You are having to maintain full coverage on that car which has probably raised your insurance premium about $100 a month. So, that vehicle is costing you $5160 per year.

If you purchase a new car at $4000 per year AND THROW IT AWAY at the end of the year, you're ahead.

You don't have to cover that extra $100 in full coverage. What are the chances you are going to throw away the car at the end of the year? Slim. I require one year out of each vehicle and I haven't spent near $4000 since I had my last car payment on a new car. I purchased my SUV 3 years ago for $2000. We maintain it and figure $100 a month in vehicle maintenance. Total cost of $4400 INCLUDING  oil, tires and about $600 in a maintenance fund. Over 3 years your car has cost you $15840. WITHOUT oil, tires and any repairs. That's a difference of $11440. That's $3800 per year or just over $300 per month.  I am still driving that SUV and I had someone offer me $2000 for it because I am thinking I want something different. I can change my cars as the whim strikes me.

That's only one vehicle and it's savings would have allowed you to purchase 3 vehicles and throw them away in a year out of what you spent. I have a LOT of stashed money in my vehicle account because those vehicles always last more than a year. Did I mention that is my JUNK second vehicle? My first vehicle is much newer... much. I had saved enough money to buy that new with cash by not having a car payment. 

And Yes, I have accounts for everything. It's easier that way and money gets "hidden" and saved that way. It started with operating the businesses and having a payroll, tax and overhead accounts and I extended it into my home life. Which leads me to my next suggestion...  

One other thing I found is that if you have the money you spend it (which is why I said you have excuses.) If you make it go away before you ever receive it you adjust. I have stopped the $ from actually coming home. I don't have any choice but to use only what is in the operating account. When I first started doing it I had to put it into something that I couldn't touch come hell or high water-as if you didn't have it. If you can just pull it from savings-you will.   I allow $50000 per year into our operating budget for the family. That includes the monthly everything budget, our vacation and roughly $5000-7000 for my son's wrestling.

You mentioned student loans-for heaven's sake pay them off. If that's what your income level is with 2 kids you got a tax refund. What did you do with it? Probably purchased some things you needed? If you had paid off your student loans how much money would that be each month? And how much LESS in intrest would it be? You could purchase those things you needed every month instead of waiting until tax time.

I do not have a credit card with a balance on it. I do use a credit card every time I purchase ANYTHING or pay a bill or ANYTHING I can put on a credit card except gas in order to rack up mileage. Our vacation tickets this year cost me $50 in fees for all 5 of us. I pay the bill with the card, come home and pay the card off. No intrest, no payments but, lots of miles!! This year it isn't paying a hotel because we aren't going anywhere other than to visit my son but, usually we do and depending on the year it sometimes manages to cover that hotel room too. 

Quoting momofsunshine77:

 I wish I had a garden.  I have a brown thumb and I live at 10000 feet.  Nothing grows here unless you are REALLY good at it and it takes A LOT.  I dont even have a lot of dirt, mostly rocks, we dont have grass or regular trees - just pine. 


Quoting Zazayam:

Do you have room for a garden? It doesn't take a lot of room to grow enough to supplement... You'll probably have to buy at least a little produce no matter what, but it does help. I spend about 600ish a month on all of us and we eat very healthy with only a few packaged foods. It might be worth driving the extra 10 miles to a different grocery store too, that just seems crazy to me.

Quoting momofsunshine77:

I clip coupons, but there aren't any for fresh produce and meats. I make a lot of things from scartch, so I end up buying ingredients instead of packaged food. produce is EXPENSIVE, so is meats. I definitely dont eat the way I would like to because it costs too much. I price meats everytime I go and dont buy it if it is expensive that week. Produce and meats are one thing I will not buy on "sale" I have bought rotten meat before by doing that and dont trust it anymore. I have 2 kids 4 and 2 and I do get a lot of snacks like applesauce and fruits, etc for them. Because I have to drive so far I have to have things that are healthy, but easy to eat in the car. I cannot tell you how it gets to be that high but it does everytime and I do everything possible to cut the costs down on it and it doesn't happen. It adds ups quickly.
Quoting MamaSnaps:

For a family of how many? I am spending about $700 a month total on EVERYTHING for a family of 5. I am NOT an extrem couponer. I rarely remember to clip coupons at all! We eat well. 

Quoting momofsunshine77:

DH made 75,000 last year with OT and brought home 45,000. I guess we live in a high cost area. We pay 1200 in rent, about 600 in all our utilities. we have propane - very expensive will never get it again. I spend about 600 every 2 weeks on food, not including any necessities like toilet paper, paper towels, toiletries, diapers, etc. We have 2 cars and one payment of about 330 a month. insurance is about 530 every 6 months. I have to drive about 45 minutes to anything like grocery, etc. So we spend at least 300 in gas per month for both cars. Oil change every 2 months. If I send my 4yo to preschool we would have to add on another 700 per month for public preschool, 800 for private. And again I would have to drive 45 minutes to get there one way. None of this includes if anyone needs clothing or shoes or anything in the house if we need to replace it, like worn out towels, bedding, broken dishes, etc.
Quoting illogicalkat:

Do you live in a high-cost area? $51k seems like it should be able to carry you. After taxes (let's call it 20%), that should be $40,800 per year, or $3400 per month take-home.

$3400 - 1200 for rent leaves you with $2200 for bills and expenses.

Groceries for a family of 3 might average $600/month, leaving you with $1600.

Then you utilities shouldn't cost more than about $200, which leaves $1400.

So now that necessities are covered, what is left that you are paying? Car note, insurance premiums, smartphones, cable/satellite/internet, student loans? Aside from the student loans, those are things that you can adjust.

Quoting momofsunshine77:

We dont save cuz there isnt anything to save. I am going to be VERY LUCKY to buy food this week. We are trying to move, and I was looking at a condo for 1200 a month, what we pay now for rent, and when we got to the office the lady said there was a limit of 51,000 a year. We make more than that so we "make too much money". I can tell you for sure that if we only made 51,000 a year there is NO WAY we could afford 1200 a month in rent. So, how do they do it?
Quoting DaWife806:

Do you all save more than other people? We live"pay check to pay check" but we move money to bills and savings on payday. If there is money left over in the account the day before payday we feel like we didn't appropriately save the previous check.

The other explanations could be PA, parents supporting their adult children, ect.













RheaF
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 9:08 AM

 Perhaps they have no debt? They budget better than you? Right now, we do still have a little debt, and are by no means well off. We are lower middle class. Once our montthly bills are paid however, we do have a little left over to do fun extras with. It is all about budgeting, and not spending a lot on little extras that we really don't need(those little purchases add up fast, leaving you with nothing to show for them).

Maries_Mom23
by Member on Apr. 25, 2013 at 9:16 AM
1 mom liked this

I'd say credit cards....my aunt is like that.  ALWAYS going out to eat with friends (nicer restaurants at least once a week), has made it a point to say she gets a pedicure every month, trips all the time, you name it.  

Found out from a cousin (and I believe it) that it all goes on credit cards.

Sad, really.  I'm trying to pay off credit card debt that DH and I were stupid enough to let rack up.  All of the "extras" don't happen for us either, but paying off that debt will be well worth it in the end!  

WillsMOM72
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 9:52 AM
My hubby makes around $25k a year and our rent is $800 a month and we have a lot of extras. We don't use credit cards for things. He gives me $150 a week for groceries and anything extra I might need. We do go out to eat during the week and I'm a SAHM. My hubby does work a lot of overtime.
I tried to read all the replies and something just doesn't look right? You hubby needs to stop putting so much in savings if your struggling. If he refuses is there any way you can get a job? My son goes to a private school and we only pay $400 a month. I buy snacks for my son and I don't normally make stuff from scratch. I try to shop from the sale stuff. We are a family of 3 with a huge dog and a kitten. Sorry I'm not much help. I live in AL maybe it's just higher where you live.
momofsunshine77
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 11:37 AM
WE have no debt. And I have been to a budget cousnselor and have a budget set. Our outs for basics are more than our ins, and I do not know why. We have no extra for fun stuff. We have no extra for anything.
Quoting RheaF:

 Perhaps they have no debt? They budget better than you? Right now, we do still have a little debt, and are by no means well off. We are lower middle class. Once our montthly bills are paid however, we do have a little left over to do fun extras with. It is all about budgeting, and not spending a lot on little extras that we really don't need(those little purchases add up fast, leaving you with nothing to show for them).


momofsunshine77
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 11:45 AM
I am trying to find a job. I am a vet, and could definitely make up for the amount we need, but there is nothing where we are - we are inthe middle of nowhere - LOL. Finding another job that pays enough to pay for daycare AND bring something home is another thing. Nothing pays enough to make it worth it. It would ALL go to daycare. LOL
Quoting WillsMOM72:

My hubby makes around $25k a year and our rent is $800 a month and we have a lot of extras. We don't use credit cards for things. He gives me $150 a week for groceries and anything extra I might need. We do go out to eat during the week and I'm a SAHM. My hubby does work a lot of overtime.
I tried to read all the replies and something just doesn't look right? You hubby needs to stop putting so much in savings if your struggling. If he refuses is there any way you can get a job? My son goes to a private school and we only pay $400 a month. I buy snacks for my son and I don't normally make stuff from scratch. I try to shop from the sale stuff. We are a family of 3 with a huge dog and a kitten. Sorry I'm not much help. I live in AL maybe it's just higher where you live.

RheaF
by on Apr. 25, 2013 at 4:16 PM
Their ins are obviously more than their outs,lol. There must be something you can cut out if you want to have "extra".


Quoting momofsunshine77:

WE have no debt. And I have been to a budget cousnselor and have a budget set. Our outs for basics are more than our ins, and I do not know why. We have no extra for fun stuff. We have no extra for anything.



Quoting RheaF:

 Perhaps they have no debt? They budget better than you? Right now, we do still have a little debt, and are by no means well off. We are lower middle class. Once our montthly bills are paid however, we do have a little left over to do fun extras with. It is all about budgeting, and not spending a lot on little extras that we really don't need(those little purchases add up fast, leaving you with nothing to show for them).



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