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Moving back in with parents, yet being more independent

Posted by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 2:29 PM
  • 12 Replies
I am moving back in with parents once my lease it up. Rent keeps going up each year, I am not ready to buy a house yet, and I would rather save my "rent" money. I am moving back in with them on the condition that I help out around the house and pay a couple bills. Totally reasonable!!! Nothing is set in stone yet, but my mom and I have been tossing around the idea of me paying the cable bill, cooking for everyone, and helping out with the cleaning. My only problem is my parents (it's really just my mother) are extremely overbearing when it comes to me raising my DD. Is it possible to instill my values and believes in my daughter while living under my parent's roof?
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 2:29 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Bleacheddecay
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 2:51 PM

I wouldn't do it. Your mom will be just like you know she is. Living there and trying to null her values while inserting your own in your child is going to be difficult if not impossible.

jojo_star
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 3:22 PM

No, I doubt it. 

Lydlou02
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 3:27 PM
Ig they have a separate apt for you it would work, but if you're sharing a kitchen, dinning and living room then you'll have to be able to function as a single family group. Arguments over child rearing could be very difficult.
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Two_Hearts
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 3:30 PM

I wouldn't do it at all...personally i would just move into something that is a little smaller and cost less...and then save up the money for the house that way.

It may take you a little longer...but at least you will have your sanity and the relationship with your mom will stay in tact.

JTE11
by Bronze Member on Apr. 27, 2013 at 3:35 PM

I don't know if that will be possible, it will depend on how understanding your parents are about your authority as parent. If they don't respect that you have the final say in her upbringing then you are probably in for some trouble. it sounds like it's pretty likely that your mom will be overstepping in her role as grandmother since you and your DD will be right there, I foresee some battles ahead. She probably won't change and you'll be miserable. I think if you can find somewhere else to live it will be much better for you.

rockinmomto2
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 3:35 PM

Nope. Unfortunately it's going to cause a lot of problems unless you seriously iron out ANY details about child rearing before moving in.

atlmom2
by Ruby Member on Apr. 27, 2013 at 3:49 PM
What does she really do you hate??
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armyvet06
by Ashley on Apr. 27, 2013 at 3:55 PM
I live with my parents. Its hard at times to instill my own values in her with them around at times. Right now its just my dad in the house with us and he is usually pretty good with letting me raise her. But I know when my mom gets home, its going to be harder because she will trying to go behind my back with certain things including the way I discipline.
jackiewal10
by Gold Member on Apr. 27, 2013 at 4:05 PM

I agree with everyone else.  If your mother is really that overbaring and can't respect that YOU are your DD's mother, then that isn't going to change.  In fact, it will only get worse living under the same roof and it will be VERY confusing for your DD.  If you have any other option....finding a different apartment or a house to rent that is cheaper, I would go that route before moving back in with your parents.  It's HARD for adults to live together, even if it's parents and their adult children.

MyStarLight
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 4:29 PM
Your mom will start telling how to raise her and treat your child
trust me i know
I pay $600 a month sometimes more and yet i cant even ground my daughter
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