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Could use some (legal) advice/help

Posted by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 2:50 AM
  • 20 Replies
I was just reading someone's post and in a comment were talking about a certain law in that state and well its got the gears in my head turning. Well I'm a single mom, my DS will b 2 in July. I've struggled for a long time to find my place in this world and still struggling. U see as to some it may not seem like I'm tryn to grow up, make a life for me and my son, etc etc etc I really and truly am. I've struggled for a long time w/ the issue of pursuing child support and terminating my exs legal rights in terrible fear of my ex taking my DS. His name isn't on the bc, he's never seen the child except pics and once on web cam, he's never sent me a dime, he's not from this state even. I get told how I should file for cs but then someone who worked for a lawyer said it wouldn't be much worth it. I know in this state that if the father doesn't sign the bc by the 1st yr he has no rights anyways. Before I start rambling on I was wondering if anyone could help me figure out if I should look into terminating my exs rights and get cs or should I just leave it alone???

Honestly I could really use the money to help me out in so many ways but I'm between a rock and a hard place w/ my decision. HELP?!?!?!!!


The thing is I don't want ex in my DS life when we were together everything was nothing but lies, a family full of back stabbers and drunks. I don't want my DS around those kinda ppl. I'm from Louisiana he's from Indiana. Where he actually lives now is beyond me cause like I said previously he lies a lot. Technically u could call him a compulsive lier.
by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 2:50 AM
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Replies (1-10):
mnivis01
by Member on Apr. 29, 2013 at 2:51 AM
Did you delete your previous post? Or was it in a different group?
MzShorty787
by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 2:55 AM
I hv it in another group too. Just tryn to get as much so to say brain power on this as possible
mnivis01
by Member on Apr. 29, 2013 at 2:56 AM
Well do you think filing would help any? Would he pay the child support?

Quoting MzShorty787:

I hv it in another group too. Just tryn to get as much so to say brain power on this as possible
MzShorty787
by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 3:00 AM
Honestly I hv no idea b/c simply of the fact he has lied so much to me in the past, plus the fact I hvnt spoken to him in many months, so even if I talked to him tomorrow and he said I hv a job pays this much and I wanna pay u this much. I hv no reason to believe him cause he has told me in the past he was gonna send me money and NEVER did. So I can't honestly answer that.


Quoting mnivis01:

Well do you think filing would help any? Would he pay the child support?



Quoting MzShorty787:

I hv it in another group too. Just tryn to get as much so to say brain power on this as possible

mnivis01
by Member on Apr. 29, 2013 at 3:08 AM
Hmm.. well all I can say is if you want to spend the time/money going to court to do so.. Go for it! Afterall, it is his responsibility too.

I didn't want to go for CS, but the state sort of pushed me into it. My ex had taken our son (an agreement just made between him and I) and then held him hostage for 3 days, so I went to the court house to see if they could do anything.

I know they didn't hold a gun to MY head and say I had too.. But I was so helpless, irrational, just wanted my BABY back that I filled out whatever the put in front of me.

In my state (Idk if its the same everywhere) if you file for child support, it also automatically sets up a custody case. So Idk if that's something you would want to deal with.

Quoting MzShorty787:Honestly I hv no idea b/c simply of the fact he has lied so much to me in the past, plus the fact I hvnt spoken to him in many months, so even if I talked to him tomorrow and he said I hv a job pays this much and I wanna pay u this much. I hv no reason to believe him cause he has told me in the past he was gonna send me money and NEVER did. So I can't honestly answer that.


Quoting mnivis01:Well do you think filing would help any? Would he pay the child support?


Quoting MzShorty787:

I hv it in another group too. Just tryn to get as much so to say brain power on this as possible

MzShorty787
by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 3:11 AM
All I know is if u try to apply for the govt assistance monay u hv to go thru the steps for child support. Cause a while back I attempted to do so


Quoting mnivis01:

Hmm.. well all I can say is if you want to spend the time/money going to court to do so.. Go for it! Afterall, it is his responsibility too.



I didn't want to go for CS, but the state sort of pushed me into it. My ex had taken our son (an agreement just made between him and I) and then held him hostage for 3 days, so I went to the court house to see if they could do anything.



I know they didn't hold a gun to MY head and say I had too.. But I was so helpless, irrational, just wanted my BABY back that I filled out whatever the put in front of me.



In my state (Idk if its the same everywhere) if you file for child support, it also automatically sets up a custody case. So Idk if that's something you would want to deal with.



Quoting MzShorty787:Honestly I hv no idea b/c simply of the fact he has lied so much to me in the past, plus the fact I hvnt spoken to him in many months, so even if I talked to him tomorrow and he said I hv a job pays this much and I wanna pay u this much. I hv no reason to believe him cause he has told me in the past he was gonna send me money and NEVER did. So I can't honestly answer that.





Quoting mnivis01:Well do you think filing would help any? Would he pay the child support?





Quoting MzShorty787:

I hv it in another group too. Just tryn to get as much so to say brain power on this as possible


mnivis01
by Member on Apr. 29, 2013 at 3:14 AM
Yes. I know they will do that. Im not sure on your laws, but here they do custody/child support together.

I would just be prepared for all outcomes. If he asks for custody, and the judge agrees, he will get your LO, 4-6 weeks in the summer since you two are in different states.


Quoting MzShorty787:

All I know is if u try to apply for the govt assistance monay u hv to go thru the steps for child support. Cause a while back I attempted to do so




Quoting mnivis01:

Hmm.. well all I can say is if you want to spend the time/money going to court to do so.. Go for it! Afterall, it is his responsibility too.





I didn't want to go for CS, but the state sort of pushed me into it. My ex had taken our son (an agreement just made between him and I) and then held him hostage for 3 days, so I went to the court house to see if they could do anything.





I know they didn't hold a gun to MY head and say I had too.. But I was so helpless, irrational, just wanted my BABY back that I filled out whatever the put in front of me.





In my state (Idk if its the same everywhere) if you file for child support, it also automatically sets up a custody case. So Idk if that's something you would want to deal with.





Quoting MzShorty787:Honestly I hv no idea b/c simply of the fact he has lied so much to me in the past, plus the fact I hvnt spoken to him in many months, so even if I talked to him tomorrow and he said I hv a job pays this much and I wanna pay u this much. I hv no reason to believe him cause he has told me in the past he was gonna send me money and NEVER did. So I can't honestly answer that.








Quoting mnivis01:Well do you think filing would help any? Would he pay the child support?








Quoting MzShorty787:

I hv it in another group too. Just tryn to get as much so to say brain power on this as possible


MzShorty787
by on Apr. 29, 2013 at 3:19 AM
Well if I hv to I'll just do w/o the cs and struggle if it means keeping that garbage out DS life and raising him right. I mean if nothing else I can just get food stamps and that would at least help some.


Quoting mnivis01:

Yes. I know they will do that. Im not sure on your laws, but here they do custody/child support together.



I would just be prepared for all outcomes. If he asks for custody, and the judge agrees, he will get your LO, 4-6 weeks in the summer since you two are in different states.




Quoting MzShorty787:

All I know is if u try to apply for the govt assistance monay u hv to go thru the steps for child support. Cause a while back I attempted to do so






Quoting mnivis01:

Hmm.. well all I can say is if you want to spend the time/money going to court to do so.. Go for it! Afterall, it is his responsibility too.







I didn't want to go for CS, but the state sort of pushed me into it. My ex had taken our son (an agreement just made between him and I) and then held him hostage for 3 days, so I went to the court house to see if they could do anything.







I know they didn't hold a gun to MY head and say I had too.. But I was so helpless, irrational, just wanted my BABY back that I filled out whatever the put in front of me.







In my state (Idk if its the same everywhere) if you file for child support, it also automatically sets up a custody case. So Idk if that's something you would want to deal with.







Quoting MzShorty787:Honestly I hv no idea b/c simply of the fact he has lied so much to me in the past, plus the fact I hvnt spoken to him in many months, so even if I talked to him tomorrow and he said I hv a job pays this much and I wanna pay u this much. I hv no reason to believe him cause he has told me in the past he was gonna send me money and NEVER did. So I can't honestly answer that.











Quoting mnivis01:Well do you think filing would help any? Would he pay the child support?











Quoting MzShorty787:

I hv it in another group too. Just tryn to get as much so to say brain power on this as possible



mnivis01
by Member on Apr. 29, 2013 at 3:22 AM
I don't know your situation and it is YOUR life. I can't tell you what to do.

But, if you have proof that he is a 'loser,' he wouldn't get visits anyway. Or at least only get supervised.

My ex was ordered supervised and has yet to set one up! But he hasn't paid child support either.


Quoting MzShorty787:

Well if I hv to I'll just do w/o the cs and struggle if it means keeping that garbage out DS life and raising him right. I mean if nothing else I can just get food stamps and that would at least help some.




Quoting mnivis01:

Yes. I know they will do that. Im not sure on your laws, but here they do custody/child support together.





I would just be prepared for all outcomes. If he asks for custody, and the judge agrees, he will get your LO, 4-6 weeks in the summer since you two are in different states.






Quoting MzShorty787:

All I know is if u try to apply for the govt assistance monay u hv to go thru the steps for child support. Cause a while back I attempted to do so








Quoting mnivis01:

Hmm.. well all I can say is if you want to spend the time/money going to court to do so.. Go for it! Afterall, it is his responsibility too.









I didn't want to go for CS, but the state sort of pushed me into it. My ex had taken our son (an agreement just made between him and I) and then held him hostage for 3 days, so I went to the court house to see if they could do anything.









I know they didn't hold a gun to MY head and say I had too.. But I was so helpless, irrational, just wanted my BABY back that I filled out whatever the put in front of me.









In my state (Idk if its the same everywhere) if you file for child support, it also automatically sets up a custody case. So Idk if that's something you would want to deal with.









Quoting MzShorty787:Honestly I hv no idea b/c simply of the fact he has lied so much to me in the past, plus the fact I hvnt spoken to him in many months, so even if I talked to him tomorrow and he said I hv a job pays this much and I wanna pay u this much. I hv no reason to believe him cause he has told me in the past he was gonna send me money and NEVER did. So I can't honestly answer that.














Quoting mnivis01:Well do you think filing would help any? Would he pay the child support?














Quoting MzShorty787:

I hv it in another group too. Just tryn to get as much so to say brain power on this as possible



mnivis01
by Member on Apr. 29, 2013 at 3:23 AM
Also, you should have a back up plan anyways. Just because you get a child support order, doesn't mean he will pay it. You could just be sitting there with nothing from him.. like you are now..
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