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Advice for Moms Advice for Moms

Finding a Babysitter

Posted by on May. 1, 2013 at 12:31 PM
  • 20 Replies

When did you first leave your LO with a "stranger" babysitter - i.e. not a family member or close friend. We don't have family in the area, so it's hard for my husband and I to get out. He's VERY reluctant to get any sort of babysitter other than a friend. DD is 15 months old now, and she's never been left with a "stranger." Granted, I wouldn't go get someone off the street to watch her...but if a mom friend recommends a good babysitter that she uses on a regular basis, I feel pretty comfortable with that. Hubby does not.

by on May. 1, 2013 at 12:31 PM
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Replies (1-10):
littlemoments99
by Member on May. 1, 2013 at 1:01 PM

I am not sure. You could maybe just try to interview one. You don't have to use the babysitter, but just get one interview in. That might settle your husband down. You can actually kind of get to know the person. Or you could try to have a babysitter over for an hour or two while you, your husband, or both are home. The babysitter can play with your baby and you can get to see how the babysitter acts and treats your child.

atlmom2
by Ruby Member on May. 1, 2013 at 1:18 PM
3 months old in daycare. Never lived near family. Mostly used HS girls I got recommended when they got older.
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Bleacheddecay
by on May. 1, 2013 at 4:45 PM

The first time was pretty young and we were on a trip so we used a bonded sitter there.

Later we went off of a list from a local college.

SamMom912
by Silver Member on May. 1, 2013 at 5:52 PM

I asked neighbirs with kids that were a little older / school aged who they used and liked and called their sitters. I also called a local,place that taught babysitting and asked for a list if their graduates. We also have baby swapped with friends who had little ones our kids age... The kids would "play" they were 1.... And the parents would go out... Then we would swap the following Saturday and they would watch our little one. That only worked for a little bit as they typically had family nearby and didnt need us as much as we needed them.. But it worked with a few different friends for a little while. It was usually only from 5:30-8 pm and then you still had to do bedtime routine... 

Babysitters in our area get 10-15 an hour... So, in the beginning it was sticker shock to go out for dinner and then have to pay 40-60 bucks in addition to the 100 on dinner for the sitter. Lol... Ouch! 

Now that our son is almost 7 we often arrange for sleep overs at friends houses when we have big dinner plans... And always reciprocate. :) 

Mom2Vannah
by on May. 1, 2013 at 6:49 PM

3 months old when I went back to work. We had a high school girl come by our home for the 3 hours I was gone until my husband got off work. We did this for about a year. 

kali_mom
by on May. 2, 2013 at 10:05 AM
My DH isn't going for that so I can't really answer this. We have our time together after babies are in bed.
CameronsMommy23
by on May. 2, 2013 at 10:13 AM
Our kids are only babysat by family. My mom or my sisters usually. We were raised with the idea that only family should babysit if at all possible. If I was in an emergency situation where I couldn't bring the kids I could probably leave them with one of my close friends but that wouldn't be my first choice and it hasn't happened thus far.

In your situation I'd get a referral from a friend on a good sitter or go to Care.com maybe. They have babysitter listings with references. I think 15 mons is a good age to start having a babysitter. I'd start with short outings at first to see how it goes.
marisab
by on May. 2, 2013 at 1:14 PM

never have but started sday care at 7 mos

LilliesValley
by on May. 2, 2013 at 1:16 PM
We left dd with the neighbours. They have two kids of their own and it was an hour or so. Other than that I've always had family available.
LoreleiSieja
by on May. 2, 2013 at 1:31 PM

I can understand hubby's reluctance.  It is a very cruel world we live in, with terrible people who do terrible things.  My BEST advice, would be to find a day care center or home that has video cameras installed so you can SEE your child anytime you want.  Also, with a group home or center, one person is not left alone unattended with the child at any time.  

I took my granddaughter to a licensed day care center, though, and she came home with finger-shaped bruises on her legs, like some one gripped her painfully hard when changing her diaper.  I took my precious middle daughter to a licensed day care center, and a year later, her day care teacher was arrested for child abuse!  I never knew if she had hurt my child, but she had been found guilty of hurting a number of children.  I had a teenaged boy babysitter once, that the neighbors all recommended, and when I came home, my two year old daughter informed me that he had a penis just like her little brother.  Now how would she know that unless he showed it to her?  And I was so careful!  I was almost paranoid about leaving my kids anywhere, and we sure had our bad luck.

Yet, you and your honey deserve to have a life together.  You need to have "date night" to keep your marriage and romance alive.  

Go ahead and ask your friends for the babysitters they recommend.  Then interview the kids.  Find out if they go to church, or belong to any clubs.  Troubled teens seldom participate in band, 4H, or other youth programs.  Avoid a babysitter with tatoos or body piercings - maybe this is being prejudiced, but these are signs of rebellion, and you do not want a troubled teen watching your child.  Do your best to find a healthy, wholesome, responsible person to watch your little one, then try to enjoy yourself when you're out.  When you return home - is your child sleeping soundly?  When she awakes, and you change her diaper, do you notice any unexplained bruises on her legs?  Do your best, and pray for the best.

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