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feeling confused

Posted by on May. 22, 2013 at 10:56 PM
  • 5 Replies

in 2011 my husband(whom i wasnt with yet) got a girl pregnant, she told him she got an abortion and left him. Well he found out she had the baby (at 31 weeks because she had no prenatel care and wasnt taking care of herself) he went and saw the baby in the hospital she was so sick and hardly breathing on her own. well once she got better the mom took her out of state(never put him on the birth cert, he wasnt supposed to know about the baby!!!! she was mad he found out!) and didnt tell him!!! then when the baby was 10 months she randomly text him saying that she was giving the baby up for adopion and then we couldnt get ahold of her!!! thru some ultimate facebook stalking on my part and can gaurentee that the baby was given up for adoption!!!!! it breaks my heart!!!!! i would have loved that little girl like she was my own( i have 3 kids and pregnant again) we have no way of knowing if the baby is ok, last time my husband saw her she was on breathing tube and not breathing on her own!!!! she would be 20 months right now! i cant seem to get her off of my mind and just want to know if she is ok!!! i would never take her from her adoptive parents because that isnt fair to them( we have the dna papers stating my husband is the dad!!!!!) we just want to know if she is ok and to know that we love her!!!! any advice or know how to find her?? my husband didnt have any choices in this!!!! and is heart broken by it!!!!! he has her name tattooed on his arm and we still talk about her! i just dont know what to do!!!

by on May. 22, 2013 at 10:56 PM
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Replies (1-5):
belindah
by on May. 22, 2013 at 10:59 PM
I would contact a lawyer and take it from there
paulswifey11
by Member on May. 22, 2013 at 11:00 PM
The research can be done. DNA can be done, if he is the father then he has rights to her. The adoption could be denied.
onethentwins
by Member on May. 26, 2013 at 3:00 PM

 


Quoting paulswifey11:

The research can be done. DNA can be done, if he is the father then he has rights to her. The adoption could be denied.


 She's right. I know you don't want to break the adoptive parents hearts, but that little girl is better off with her birth father and her half siblings. Off the top of my head three stories where the father got his child back that was adopted out without his concent:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baby_Richard_case

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baby_Jessica_case

http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/news/55373764-78/achane-adoption-bland-child.html.csp

and a Father who's still fighting: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/04/13/AR2010041302445.html

Kellyjude1
by Member on May. 26, 2013 at 5:43 PM

  I do not see how any adoption could have possibly legally been done.  Your husband most defintely would have needed to be notified.  If you have dna proving your husband is the father of that baby then he has rights. I see from your posting you don't want to disrupt the adoption which now the baby if placed would be bonded with the adoptive parents. This is such a sad situation. The mother of this child if the baby was placed for adoption had to have lied about knowing who the bio father was, because otherwise he would have been notified. Your husband most definitely should have had a choice.  I hope you can at least find out where the baby is and go from there.  

conniejo75
by Bronze Member on May. 26, 2013 at 5:58 PM
He needs to find out adoptive parents info and contact a lawyer. Once DNA is established he can have the adoption reversed. I would also make sure he gets sole custody and you adopt the child so mom can't come back.
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