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7 and looking at porn?!

Posted by on Jun. 9, 2013 at 1:32 PM
  • 63 Replies
My 7 year old son was at a friend's house last night and this morning the 2 boys were cought looking at porn on the other boy's iPod. I've got teenage stepsons who share a room with my 7yo and openly talk about this kind of stuff, despite our many attempts to curb it. I don't know what to do it how to properly handle it. Help!
by on Jun. 9, 2013 at 1:32 PM
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Replies (1-10):
thatgirl70
by Carin on Jun. 9, 2013 at 1:40 PM
1 mom liked this

I'd start off with talking to the other parents.

conniejo75
by Bronze Member on Jun. 9, 2013 at 1:44 PM
2 moms liked this
I would talk to other parents. And then talk to your son. At that age it is probably just curiousity or he didn't believe what he heard his brothers talking about. I would also have your husband talk to the older boys about what is inappropriate
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atlmom2
by Ruby Member on Jun. 9, 2013 at 2:36 PM
5 moms liked this
They shouldn't have any access to computers, ipods at this age. The teenagers need to know porn is not acceptable either and talking about it to a 7 year old is not either. It is degrading to women.
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jojo_star
by on Jun. 9, 2013 at 2:54 PM
2 moms liked this

I'd have a family meeting with all parents involved and the stepsons, about what is appropriate in front of small children. I'd also talk to the other's boys family. The best solution would be for the 7 year old to have his own room though, because the older boys are going to talk. And, I'd talk to the stepsons and 7 year old about what porn is, and when and where it is appropriate to view. 

SamMom912
by Silver Member on Jun. 9, 2013 at 4:10 PM
2 moms liked this
Id ask tons and tons of questions of your son. Is he curious? What were they looking at? Did they search or come upon it? Does he have questions about what he saw?
Id explain that whatever it was he saw is for grown ups, not 7 year olds... (Like bad language... ) is inappropriate for him to look at at 7. If he does have questions about what he saw; talk open and honest and at his level ( simplifying) as much as you can.
Id tell him that while he is 7... Until he is older he shouldnt b looking at that stuff.. And id also tell him if you cant trust that he wont; then you may have to curb his play dates at other houses. He is responsible for what he looks at; he walks away, closes his eyes, leaves the playdate...whatever his choice is ----but you'd prefer he not look!
Ask him if you can trust him not to. Also remind him that the human body is beautiful and interesting to look at. People have painted and sculpted it for centuries. Tell him he isnt alone in his curiousity- but as his parent; your the one responsible for teaching and explaining all that... Not the internet; not his friends. Remind him that a lot of info he may hear growing up, simply may not b true; and that if at any point if time he wants clarification- your his mom, and you'll tell him the truth. If he is too embarrassed to ask- tell him he can write a note, or you guys can talk in a dark room... Better he has info... Hugs.. 7... Ugh... Kids today! Lol
sabrtooth1
by on Jun. 9, 2013 at 6:12 PM

Why is a 7 yo on a sleepover?  Why does a 7yo have an IPod?  Why are 2 7yo's by themselves, NOT being supervised?  Why do teens have accesss to electronics in their bedroom--or ANY unsupervised area?  Why don't electronics have parental controls on them?  Why are TEENS sharing a room with a 7yo?

You need to get control of your family.

eSamsMama
by on Jun. 9, 2013 at 10:53 PM
Let me see if I can address everything.

I don't know if the iPod belongs to the host boy, his sister, his parents, etc. Ownership was not discussed.

While I would love for my kids to have their own rooms, its not an option. We are already 3 to a bedroom.

The older boys have been told many times to keep conversion appropriate around him. It seems to go in one ear and out the other.

Its not realistic to keep a 15 and 17 yr old away from computers. They have a computer in their room which the 7yo doesn't have the password to. The older boys also have smart phones.

I talked to 7yo. We discussed the situation and assessed punishment with DH.

7 yo has been on a few overnights, this was the first issue. I don't see the issue with sleepovers at this age. I would imagine at some point the kids had to go to bed and were left alone.
sabrtooth1
by on Jun. 9, 2013 at 11:24 PM
My kids did not go on sleepovers in 2nd grade. My kids did not even go on playdates unless I knew the parents, and that they supervised their children the same way we supervised ours.
And yes, you can keep 16 & 17 yo's away from computers. Since they cannot use the computer responsibly, take it out of their room. Password protect it, and set it up in a public area of the house. Get rid of the smartphones for the same reasons. They don't NEED smartphones. You are the parents. Act like it.
SamMom912
by Silver Member on Jun. 10, 2013 at 7:10 AM
7 moms liked this


Wow... I dont understand this at all... You must not have much faith or trust in your kids and others.

my 6 year old (done with first grade) has slept over.. Has friends sleep over, owns an ipad. 

Remember, every one parents in their own way... To this woman Being a Parent doesnt mean exerting ultimate control over a person their thoughts and actions.. To me Being a Parent and discipline is about  love and teaching, about givng respect to my children and asking (not demanding) it back, giving enough rope to get themselves in a bit of trouble to learn from their mistake and grow. How this woman "parents" is up to her... And implying she isnt acting like a parent is offensive. 

We all parent different. Im pretty sure Looking at naked people isnt a crime...go to any art museum. 


Quoting sabrtooth1:

My kids did not go on sleepovers in 2nd grade. My kids did not even go on playdates unless I knew the parents, and that they supervised their children the same way we supervised ours.
And yes, you can keep 16 & 17 yo's away from computers. Since they cannot use the computer responsibly, take it out of their room. Password protect it, and set it up in a public area of the house. Get rid of the smartphones for the same reasons. They don't NEED smartphones. You are the parents. Act like it.



Matriarch87
by on Jun. 10, 2013 at 10:49 AM
just cover your bases momma, tighten up up on them and give a thorough talk to the boy about sex and.porns place.
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