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Tomorrow I will be seeing my OBGYN Am nervous as I will be seeing if he will work with me.

Posted by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:18 PM
  • 14 Replies

For those who do not know, I am pregnant with twin girls. I am due Oct. 9th. Doctor has told me some things that do not work or fit with my birth plan. I wrote up everything and I want, and will address it all tomorrow. I may lose him tomorrow and have to find someone new...

First off he is a great doctor and came highly reccommended from an ER doctor. He also has a great bedside manner, and will take all the time in the world to answer your questions, etc.

Here are my fears, and what I placed in my birthing plan. Tell me what you think. I don't think anything I asked for is "too much". Do you? Underneath I will put my fear, and why I am concerned.

1. I would like my sister and husband to attend the birth. They are my birthing support people. My sister should be allowed to stay as long as there is no medical reason why she cannot be there, which should only be because of an extreme emergency, and not on the assumption that there "may be" an emergency. Both my husband, (his name) and sister, (her name), should be allowed to remain with me unless that emergency should arise.

(REASON - My doctor said no sister just husband  during the actual birthing because he wanted me to deliver in an Operating room just in case I needed a C-section. He said she could be there only while laboring, but once I was close to giving birth he wanted me in the OR just in case. I say bullshit! Just in case?! So we are going to make a problem before there is a problem?! NO!)

2. I want my twins to come on their own time. I do not want to be induced if I go beyond 38 weeks either.

(REASON - Doctor has said I WONT allow you to go beyond 38 weeks. You will NOT go to 40 weeks or beyond. WHY?! He gave no reason when I asked him. BULLSHIT! My body will know when it is time, and my twins will know when it is time. Chances are I won't even make it to 38 weeks, but if I do, don't force me to go early! And my body will open up as neccessary so don't tell me my twins are "too big".)

3. If for some reason induction is neccessary, we need to have a talk about why. I would like to put in my input. Also, if it is deemed neccessary, I would like, if at all possible, NATURAL means of inducement instead of breaking my water, or using pitocin. Medical induction must be used as a last resort or only if there is an emergency.

(REASON - My obgyn seems to think pitocin is god's greatest gift.)

4. I do not want to rush to the hospital at the first signs of labor. I want to be calm, at home, and with my beautiful boys for as long as possible. If I show up at the hospital and I am not 4 centimeters or more dialated, I want the option of going home to rest and wait.

(REASON - My doctor wants me there at the first sign.)

5. I do NOT want a routine IV or heplock unless there is a medical neccessity for it. I want to instead give my body the calories it needs, by being allowed to eat, crackers, cookies, sliced fruit, etc that I will provide. Also, in order to ensure I do not dehydrate, I want to be able to drink water with ice, suck on ice pops, and drink gatorade during the birthing process.

(REASON - My doctor wants me on IV so I don't dehydrate, but I can take care of that naturally.)

6. I do not want blood tests or other lab tests simply because it is routine procedure.

(REASON - I hate needles, and don't want to tense up and become upset, as that will hinder labor, and will cause me unnesseccary pain when it comes to fight or flight mode. I want a calm happy birth.)

7. I would like a private room with subdued lighting and drawn drapes, for both labor and birth, unless an emergency arises where I must leave said room to go to an OR. We want the labor room to be calm and quiet with the exception of my music that will playing for background noise.

(REASON - I want a calm quiet birth.)

8. We will bring our own music via an MP3 player, and a speaker, and will need a place to plug in the items.

(REASON - Music will help keep us calm and in the right mood to do this.)

9. We do not want anyone to offer us any sort of pain medications, if we want them, WE WILL ask for them. If anyone keeps asking, such as a nurse, we will ask on the 3rd time, she be removed.

(I am terrified of needles, I want a calm happy birth, I want to do this with the self hypnosis my husband and I have taken a class on and have been practicing. We will have no need for pain meds, and if someone keeps asking it will shatter the calm quiet birth we want.)

10. I want the blood pressure cuff removed in between readings.

(I want to be comfy.)

11. We would like to use a birthing tub or shower to relax in while I labor.

(The water helps with the pain.)

12. There should be no time limits on me giving birth. I will be using self hypnosis techniques I have learned in the classes I have been taking. It may take more time, but the time is worth it for us to have a pain free relaxed birth. So unless there is an emergency, we should be allowed to take all the time we need.

(self-explanatory)

13. I would like internal exams to be at a minimum, preferably at my request.

(I don't want them checking every 5 to 10 minutes.)

14. I would like to utilize gravity by being allowed to walk around, to squat, and to use a birthing ball. I do not want to do this on my back with my feet in stirrups.

(Gravity naturally will help me go faster).

15. If at all possible, I do not want to use Oxytocin or any other drug to speed up labor. This should be done at my own pace and the babies' paces.

( I dont want unnesseccary drugs introduced into my body unless there is an emergency and it is determined I need them.)

16. I refuse to purple push my babies into the world. There will be no holding of my breath and no one should even tell me to do so. There will be no desperate hard pushes. I want to breathe my babies into the world, not painfully push them into the world.

(self explanatory)

17. Application of oil or hot compresses are to be used to avoid a painful episiotomy.

(Self explanatory)

18. If a medical emergency does arise we must have a discussion, and vacuum extraction is to be used instead of foreceps.

(Foreseps can be extremely dangerous for babies.)

19. We would like to fully complete the birthing process before suctioning the baby.

(Self explanatory.)

20. Right after birth we would like our children and other family to be allowed in the room so they can see and bond with the babies.

(self explanatory)

21. Allow up to 35 to 40 minutes for natural placenta delivery.

(self explanatory)

22. In case of emergency, (of both babies), father of children, (Name), to remain with baby A in the event of a surgical procedre. Baby B to remain with sister (name). If 1 baby needs a surgical procedure, father will go with whichever baby is having issues.

(Someone I trust to be with babies in case of issues)

23. We want skin to skin contact with babies being placed on mother's abdomen immediatly after birth.

(Bonding time)

24. We want to delay cleaning and rubbing baby allowing vernix to be absorbed into babies' skin.

(Vernix is very good for babies.)

25. Delay use of Erythromycin to or other salve for baby's eyes to allow optimal sight for bonding.

(Bonding)

26. Oral Vitamin K is preferred if available. Otherwise, delay injection until after baby is acclimated.

(Again, bonding time)

27. Both breastfeeding and bottle feeding are okay.

(We don't mind a little of both if needed)

28. I want all my baby's procedures to be done in my room with a full explanation of why they are needed so I can either agree or decide not to do them, if possible. I want my babies if possible in the room with us for the duration of our hospital stay unless there is an emergency that dictates otherwise.

(Bonding)

Well that is it. Lets see how flexible my doctor is tomorrow.

by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:18 PM
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Replies (1-10):
frndlyfn
by Platinum Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:43 PM

Holy crap.  How many children have you had so far?     I do agree that the doctor needs to give reasonable explanations for each policy or procedure they use.   You would be better off doing a home birth than in a birth center or hospital with all those specifications.

Txlisa7969
by Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:55 PM

Have you considered using a nursing mid-wife?  I don't know about all the specifics with twin deliveries but I do know they are much more flexable.   Also, keep in mind some things are hospital policy and may be out of your doctors hands in deciding. 

UpSheRises
by Bronze Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:56 PM

These must be your first babies, huh?

It's great to have a plan but some of those things are related to hospital procedures which the doctor may not be in control of. I think they are great conversation starters but don't get too attached to that plan. On the big day...everything goes out the window for lots of moms.


HappyMorgana
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:57 PM

Nope. Had 3 this way (above), and now twins so.


Quoting UpSheRises:

This must be your first baby, huh?




UpSheRises
by Bronze Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 6:00 PM

Than why are you worried about it being a problem this time?


Quoting HappyMorgana:

Nope. Had 3 this way (above), and now twins so.


Quoting UpSheRises:

This must be your first baby, huh?






HappyMorgana
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 6:01 PM


Never had an OBGYN before, and he has been telling me these things. Before I had midwives. With twins, I picked an OBGYN and now he has told me basically all of the above is happening. So I am bringing this tomorrow, so I can ask him to work with me

Quoting UpSheRises:

Than why are you worried about it being a problem this time?


Quoting HappyMorgana:

Nope. Had 3 this way (above), and now twins so.


Quoting UpSheRises:

This must be your first baby, huh?








MamaToCollin
by Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 6:03 PM

Most of those things shouldn't be a big deal (atleast it isn't at this hospital I work at).  Many of them your nurse can help with (being comfortable, etc.)

However, I do understand why your OB would want you to deliver in an OR.  If you push out baby A and baby B's cord prolapses, that is an emergent situation where the baby needs to get out fast.

Good luck!  Hopefully he won't have any problems with any of it.

cjsix
by Bronze Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 6:25 PM

 You have done your resrch and have valid reasons for each.

The only thing I would change if it were mine is no Vitamin K and no blood work without parent approval at the time. The reason being this...they give a vitamin k shot because until the liver is functioning at 7-10 days old the baby's blood does not clot well. This is a problem because they are poking baby for various bloodwork while they are there. One of the blood tests they do is a PKU  which I agree should be done but,not while at the hospital. The PKU test,like the baby making it's own Vitamin K, is something that will not be accurate until the liver is functioning at 7-10 days old. These are things I learned from a nurse when having my first homebirth and had confirmed when mentioning it during the pregnancies that followed.

I also think that you should check around your area and see if there are any midwives who do homebirtand will deliver twins...some will.

UpSheRises
by Bronze Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 6:45 PM
I see. Well, good luck. Some docotrs really like to have control because they think women are too stupid to make decisions about labor and delivery.


Quoting HappyMorgana:


Never had an OBGYN before, and he has been telling me these things. Before I had midwives. With twins, I picked an OBGYN and now he has told me basically all of the above is happening. So I am bringing this tomorrow, so I can ask him to work with me


Quoting UpSheRises:

Than why are you worried about it being a problem this time?



Quoting HappyMorgana:

Nope. Had 3 this way (above), and now twins so.



Quoting UpSheRises:

This must be your first baby, huh?












Bookoholic
by Silver Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 6:55 PM
Do you mind if I keep this plan you have made, you have basicly hit all the spots that I have decided on for my next. I'm sure there could be a few I will add but as a stepping stone do you mind it I utilize it?
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