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Help getting my daughter to sleep through the night

Posted by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 9:35 PM
  • 11 Replies

I am a first-time single mom. My daughter is 13 months. We finish eating dinner by 6 or 7. So around 7pm to 8pm every night I give my daughter a bath, read her a book, breastfeed her and she usually falls asleep in my arms and I put her in her crib, which is near my bed in my room. I usually go to bed an hour or so later. (Just so I can get as much sleep as possible!) And than she is up 2 to 3 hours later fussing. So I usually get her out of her crib feed her and than just let her sleep with me because frankly it is easier than trying to move her back to her crib. But I am started to go a little crazy from lack of sleep, waking up every couple hours to feed her and then we are up by 6am or 7am. Should I stop the co-sleeping? What is the best way to get her to sleep through the night? Should I move her crib? I can move it to another room it is just down the hall so I didn't want to have to get up all night & go down the hall to comfort her. That may sound terrible but I am so tired and have been for over a year now. I am sure that is typical esp with the other single moms out there! Tell me how do you all do it?! Thanks! 

by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 9:35 PM
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Replies (1-10):
atlmom2
by Ruby Member on Sep. 2, 2013 at 9:38 PM
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Do you rush in? She may not have any chance to self soothe. They learn that. My oldest slept 6 hours straight first night home. 5 months for my youngest to sleep from 10 to 6. I thought that was bad. She should not have to eat during the night at over a year.
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Tckosdk.2012
by Bronze Member on Sep. 2, 2013 at 11:13 PM
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I have a one yr old & I do the exact same thing. She starts out in her crib but usually ends up in bed with me so I can night nurse & we can both sleep. My dd is also waking more but I think it's due to teething & recently meeting big milestones. Sometimes with the crawling & walking they need to night nurse to make up for the callories they burn during the day. I personally like co-sleeping because it's easier with the night nursing & since no one else can feed her but me I have to do what I have to do. I'm sure you understand. Check with the breastfeeding group here, they have lots of info on night weaning if your interested. Good luck hun & I understand, I'm tired too :)

Retrokitty
by Bronze Member on Sep. 3, 2013 at 12:42 PM
1 mom liked this
I learned to breastfeed in my sleep lol. I would just latch him on and fall back asleep. Eventually I started latching him in my sleep.
LindaClement
by on Sep. 3, 2013 at 7:19 PM

It's a fruitless quest. Humans do not 'sleep through the night' unless they're drugged.

Humans wake at the end of every sleep cycle and check their bodies and surroundings for anything that needs attending to. If there is nothing, they slip back into sleep with no memory of it (unless they're insomniacs, who sleep just as much as normal people but who have no memory of sleeping, so they're convinced they didn't -even while watching video footage of themselves clearly sleeping).

If there is something they need to deal with, people wake up and do so. Little children, who can't meet their own needs by themselves, wake their parents up for help.

She needs something: food, water, a change of covers because she's too hot or too cold...

Sometimes, when they go to bed early, it is actually that they're not presently tired. 4 or 5 hours of sleep is often 'enough' for a while, and until the advent of the electric light, it was normal for people to have 2 sleeps a night: 1st & 2nd. Often with between 90 minutes and a couple of hours between the first and second bout of sleeping.

People used to read, or write, pray, have sex, eat, tend the fire or livestock, chat quietly or do chores or crafts between sleeps.

Moving her into a crib will not change the way she sleeps at all.

cjsix
by Member on Sep. 4, 2013 at 1:35 AM
1 mom liked this
Quoting Retrokitty:

I learned to breastfeed in my sleep lol. I would just latch him on and fall back asleep. Eventually I started latching him in my sleep.
I did this too. We always had a familybed(cosleep)with our children and it was how I was able to stay from be too awfully sleep deprived. I too use to barely wake,when they started to stir but,before they woke up,pulled them close,started nursing and back into full sleep we both went. I agree with the mom who said that she may be waking a bit more right now as she is doing more and it's not only a way to make up the calories but,also reconnect with momma.You are doing a great job!
echoedsentiment
by Member on Sep. 4, 2013 at 5:02 AM
1 mom liked this

Maybe she isn't getting enough food to be able to settle her tummy for the entire night. I would talk to the pedi about this and maybe get some suggestions for this situation.

Mom2Just1
by Mom2boys on Sep. 4, 2013 at 11:57 AM

All kids sleep through the night when they're ready.

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SewingMamaLele
by Bronze Member on Sep. 4, 2013 at 12:13 PM
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It's very normal for her to still wake during the night. You can't change her needs, but you can change your perception.

If you're sleeping from 10-6 with a few interruptions, that's still 8 hours of sleep. Don't keep waiting on her to sleep longer, count wake ups and check the clock over night. She wakes, pull out the boob and go back to sleep... Shouldn't take longer than a minute or two for you to both be back to sleep.

I'm not a single mom, but dh never helped with nighttime, and i got good sleep from the start, after i learned to let go of the myth about sleeping through the night. They don't sleep through, they, need things at night and that's ok.
Imaeve2000
by on Sep. 4, 2013 at 2:42 PM


Awe I need to learn to do this! :) 

Quoting Retrokitty:

I learned to breastfeed in my sleep lol. I would just latch him on and fall back asleep. Eventually I started latching him in my sleep.



Imaeve2000
by on Sep. 4, 2013 at 2:48 PM


Right I understand. Sometimes it is quick for us to get back to sleep but sometimes it takes longer. I am maybe getting 6 to 7 hours a night on average. But those nights when it is 5 hours and she is waking every 1 -2 hours or so are so rough & I drag at work all day & never do get caught up on rest. But I guess I shouldn't worry about it it will happen eventually. And I feel better that it is normal and happens with others. I can hang in there longer! Thanks. 

Quoting SewingMamaLele:

It's very normal for her to still wake during the night. You can't change her needs, but you can change your perception.

If you're sleeping from 10-6 with a few interruptions, that's still 8 hours of sleep. Don't keep waiting on her to sleep longer, count wake ups and check the clock over night. She wakes, pull out the boob and go back to sleep... Shouldn't take longer than a minute or two for you to both be back to sleep.

I'm not a single mom, but dh never helped with nighttime, and i got good sleep from the start, after i learned to let go of the myth about sleeping through the night. They don't sleep through, they, need things at night and that's ok.



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