My husband was adopted when he was 7. He was adopted into his foster family - they had 1 other biological child, but through the years had about 13 foster kids in and out. My husband is thankful for his parents. He came from a real bad (drug/abuse) family and was lucky to be adopted. But, my husband has always felt like his parents never believed in him and felt like he was always treated differently. A few examples, to name a few - He was responsible for most of the chores, his sister's college was paid for (she ended up dropping out), but he didn't get anything (which is why he joined the military), he had to pay for his cars, she's never paid for one, They always comment about his successes, like it wasn't expected, his mom left her job when his sister got pregnant to care for her kids (she's just always been spoiled). But, even when it comes to our kids, when we go visit, they definitely get attention, but when we aren't there, they never get called, my husband rarely would get calls, if he doesn't call them, they would go a month easy without talking. Sometimes they will get a Christmas present, but no birthday calls or anything. This is the first yr my 11 yr old got a birthday card. FAST FORWARD: His parents had told us for years that they would love for his to move out there. We went back and forth for 2 years about it. Finally we decided we would go, all we asked of them was to stay with them until we could establish ourselves, jobs, house/rental, etc. We had money saved so we weren't really depending on them financially. Well, they told us we had to come in the summer months without committing 100% (my husband is usually off) to see what we could find. Well, we knew with moving to another state it was either all in or all out. We didn't want to be in limbo, plus driving back and forth would cost us more money. In addition, my husband had signed up to work that summer in an effort to save more money to move. Long story short, his parents said summer or not at all. There reason was because they already committed to remodeling their kitchen so they couldn't afford to have us there. This through me completely off because we didn't need support financially AND they had been telling us for years how bad they wanted us to move there. I was really confused. My husband ended up not talking to them for a few months, he was hurt by this. We spent so many hours, days, months, coming to this decision so to have them turn us down after practically begging us to move was like a punch in the stomach. Well, he finally e-mailed his Mom and told her how he felt and how hurt he was and was willing to put the past behind. She told him that he was just being a baby and wallowing. Well, they talked it out and things were getting better, then he started getting messages from his sister scolding him for things (random crap). Well, he got pissed because it seems like she was just trying to stir the pot. He ended up getting into it with his Mom again because she was pretty defensive of his sister - when she was just making crap up. He hasn't talked to them in about 3.5 months but it sucks. I do like his family, I always have. They are great to his sister's kids and I wish my kids had grandparents like that. My husband won't budge though, he said he's tried and isn't willing to do it again. He won't even talk about it with me anymore. He just says "my parent's are dead" (both his biological parents are deceased). It hurts me to hear him say that, but I can see why. My heart breaks. He's an amazing man. He wanted nothing more than to raise our kids where he was raised and be able to help his parents, even with simple things like cutting grass. He has a big heart but feels like they completely shut him out. I just don't know what to do about this situation. Any advice would be helpful.