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mommies PLEASE.ADVICE on 4yr old catching us in the act

Posted by on Sep. 28, 2013 at 2:44 AM
  • 20 Replies
So DD just caught us doing it. This is not the first time she's heard us. I know bc IV heard her run back to her room. So tmi but
My ass was up in the air full moon cooter an all! DH n I got into the heat of the moment an I was loud enough obviously to wake her. Although it wad dark I doubt she saw anything but I asked her if she heard me an she said yes. I told her I was having a bad dream an that DH Was hugging me an comforting me.. but she's too smart I know she doesn't know what sex is but she's already getting curious about her self.which is normal. I think.- it started atound age 2 bc ex babydaddy had her sleeping in his bed w him n gf an they messed around an he had playboy pics of girls touching themselves as a bordet around his room-- when i found this out visitation stopped an she has not seen hom since hes a druggy drunk-- anyway but still I don't want her getting too curious ya know?. DH n I feel real bad too the point we are deciding on not having sex w her at home bc we get so caught up in it an forget she's home.. we already think she's kissing boys/ boys kissing her bc she told me the other day 'lets kiss'an closed her eyes an tilted her head side to side. an I talked w her about that n stuff but idk what else to do... she's 4 !!! I'm talking w daycare an school Monday to keep her from being alone w boys just in case. But I'm so lost! I heard/ caught my parents when I was bout 6 n on. An I turned out fine. But I'm concerned all this will lead to early sexual permiscuity ( sp?) Any advice ladies?! Please no bashing. Sry so long. BTW DH works 5 12s an 2 8s 4pm to 4 am so seeing each other n sex is limited as it is.
by on Sep. 28, 2013 at 2:44 AM
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Replies (1-10):
abismommy25
by Member on Sep. 28, 2013 at 3:09 AM
Bump
kaykay61713
by Member on Sep. 28, 2013 at 3:21 AM

from personal experience with my younger sister, they are going to learn things in school. I feel its better to explain things to them yourself before they are exposed to it by a child. just sit down and talk to her when you feel its the right time. but explain it in a sense she will understand. my sister started learning about this when she was starting to stay the night at her friends house. her friend had a brother. i feel children are learning this stuff WAY WAY too soon. but its better to hear it from a parent then another child because children want to get their friends to experiment with them. its better to tell them that its not right until they are older. just talk with her. let her know what you and DH do is something that children cant do. i remember my parents telling me the same thing. i wasnt interested in boys till i was about 17 anyways but they were always very open with us. never sheltered us. and i think i turned out fine. sister is 13 now and has no interest in boys.. more interested in horses lol... but handle it the way you feel is right.. just make sure she is ready first..

atlmom2
by Platinum Member on Sep. 28, 2013 at 9:16 AM
Lock the door and better yet, wait till she is asleep. Be more mindful and careful. It isn't hard. I have no idea how to explain it. Ours never caught us.
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almburr
by Member on Sep. 28, 2013 at 9:23 AM
All five of ours have at one time have walked in on us. We didn't make a big deal out of it.

One time I was in cowgirl position. Ds8 (4 at the time) walked in and looked at me then walked out, he is a sleep walker.

Another time ds13 heard us. We had thought they were all asleep, nope. He yells you guys know that I'm still awake right?"

Dd19 once said "mommy and daddy were dirty sleeping" said that at church. Not sure where she heard that term.

They don't seem to be scared for life.
emmy526
by Silver Member on Sep. 28, 2013 at 9:38 AM

Why aren't you locking your door when you do that?    And i would explain to her that what you and your dh do is an act of love that adults do when they love each other--it's not something for children to imitate or be engaged in.  

december911
by Member on Sep. 28, 2013 at 9:42 AM

ok. this happens alot. so put a lock on your bedroom door just for times like this. seriously. I have 3 kids now, 5, 3, and a newborn. when we needed alone time, we would wait until our older two were sleeping, (newborn wasn't here yet) or put on a movie in their room, gave them popcorn, and did it as fast as we could. granted, there wasn't a lot of foreplay or romance, but with kids, the hardest times in a marriage are when they are so young. don't beat yourself up about it, just take precautions to make sure it doesn't happen again. when my 5 year old asks what we were doing in there, I tell her that mommy needs time with daddy alone, just like they like to have dates with either mommy or daddy. she said, oh. ok. can i have a date at hibachi with daddy tomorrow? LOL  that simple for us.

abismommy25
by Member on Sep. 28, 2013 at 11:15 AM
She had already been asleep atleast three hours or so. An our door does not have a lock. We normally put the 8lb weight in front of the door but just didn't. We had planned on a quickie bc it was so late. An we r getting married today an didn't wanna be tired for the bog day..which it turned into a Marathon run.lol


Quoting emmy526:

Why aren't you locking your door when you do that?    And i would explain to her that what you and your dh do is an act of love that adults do when they love each other--it's not something for children to imitate or be engaged in.  


emarin77
by Bronze Member on Sep. 28, 2013 at 1:23 PM

Mom, I still remember hearing my mother having an orgasm at 3-4 years, she was loud.  I wouldn't worry, it didn't effect me it just made me realize there is something special adults do together and when I get older I'll do them too. 

I only have sex in the middle of the night with my husband when our son is sleeping.  I suggest you do the same and not worry of what your daughter heard or saw.  If she asks you then talk about it at the level she would understand.

Retrokitty
by Bronze Member on Sep. 28, 2013 at 1:48 PM

At 4 there is no issue with her knowing the basics of it. Kids who know age appropriate information are less likeley to have sex at an early age.  

I would buy a lock for your door if you are too concerned.

a_and_j_momma
by Silver Member on Sep. 28, 2013 at 3:45 PM
2 moms liked this
Get a lock for your door
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