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insecurities

Posted by on Dec. 17, 2013 at 10:56 PM
  • 21 Replies
So I really messed up at my husband's company party by acting like a crazy insecure jealous woman. A while ago he mentioned shadowing the top seller at work. He forgot to mention she's flawless and beautiful.. I'm very insecure in my own skin ( unattractive I know) but thanks to my ex it is this way. So naturally when I found out who she was I imagined the worst things possible and couldn't keep my thoughts to myself so I started questioning why he didn't tell me. Now after causing a scene and embarrassing him, he wants out. I know my behavior was unacceptable and I truly am remorseful. But to leave me over this? Does anyone think leaving is a drastic action?
by on Dec. 17, 2013 at 10:56 PM
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Replies (1-10):
TheLadyAmalthea
by Member on Dec. 17, 2013 at 10:59 PM

It seems a bit dramatic that he would leave you over your behavior from a single event. Have you been acting like this with him for a long time? If you have, what happened recently may have just pushed him over the edge. 

offrdngal
by Terri on Dec. 17, 2013 at 11:08 PM
What kind of questions were you asking? Were you asking in an accusatory tone? Did you ask the same question over and over?
Without being there to hear the questions and see your behavior, it's hard to say whether or not he is being over-dramatic.
Relationships MUST have trust! If one does not trust the other, or one feels that the other does not trust him/her, there will never be a healthy relationship.
Would you want to be with him, if he'd behaved (toward you) as you did toward?

Mrs.Missi
by Member on Dec. 17, 2013 at 11:10 PM
This can't be a one time thing if he wants out. You've had to have repeated episodes for him to tell you to kick rocks.
Roo1234
by Bronze Member on Dec. 17, 2013 at 11:10 PM
3 moms liked this

How much professional embarrassment did you cause him?  He may feel that your actions reflected very poorly on his image and doesn't see how he will recover if you're still in the picture.  Unfair? Yes.  Extreme? Yes...but actions have consequences and he may feel that your actions are symptomatic of bigger issues.

a_and_j_momma
by Gold Member on Dec. 17, 2013 at 11:31 PM
My guess is that this isn't the first incident. Have you tried counseling?
AM-BRAT
by Amber on Dec. 17, 2013 at 11:46 PM
Understandable.

Talking with him will help.

Do you think you can handle their relationship in the future?
Elenafianza
by on Dec. 18, 2013 at 12:15 AM
Yes i am in counseling but just begun, i have a ton of stuff i need to overcome

Quoting a_and_j_momma: My guess is that this isn't the first incident. Have you tried counseling?
Elenafianza
by on Dec. 18, 2013 at 12:40 AM
Yes i was being accusatory, it's unfortunate and I'm not making exscuses but after everything I've been through trust isn't easy for me to hand out. I know i was wrong, he didn't do anything nor has he to lose my trust:(

Quoting offrdngal: What kind of questions were you asking? Were you asking in an accusatory tone? Did you ask the same question over and over?

Without being there to hear the questions and see your behavior, it's hard to say whether or not he is being over-dramatic.

Relationships MUST have trust! If one does not trust the other, or one feels that the other does not trust him/her, there will never be a healthy relationship.

Would you want to be with him, if he'd behaved (toward you) as you did toward?
nuts4scouts
by Bronze Member on Dec. 18, 2013 at 2:13 AM
1 mom liked this

The "everything " you have been thru was NOT with your current husband.

If trust is so hard for you that you can not trust your husband, no matter what, and let him, and everyone within ear-shot know that - why did you marry him?

This can not possibly be the first time you have done this, so I can understand that this might have been the absolute last straw for him.

While you imagine that you can't trust him - he knows for sure, because you have demonstrated it, that he can't trust you.

If you TRULY want this marriage to work talk to your husband and go to counseling TOGETHER.

Apgsteenmommy
by on Dec. 18, 2013 at 3:08 AM
Way over dramatic! Woah..!!! There must be something else !!! This can't be the only reason
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