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Advice for Moms Advice for Moms

DD wont stay in bed

Posted by on Jan. 23, 2014 at 12:02 PM
  • 27 Replies
1 mom liked this
DD is almost 2 and 1/2 and she won't stay in her bed when it's time for naps or bedtime. We thought we would see how she would behave with the side of her crib down as we thought she was getting too old for it. But she wouldn't stay in it and would either come to us or lay in her sisters bed. So, we put the side back up and now she has learned to climb out of it.

Older DD didn't have this problem and we switched her crib to a daybed right when she turned 2 and she never got out of it until we came to get her.

We are being woken up constantly through the night by her and older DD who is complaining about her [she is 4] and woken up at 5-6 in the morning because she's ready to get up. We are losing sleep and our patience. We have tried time outs, spankings and taking away her toys or glow pillow. We do not know what to do now. We need suggestions please.
by on Jan. 23, 2014 at 12:02 PM
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Lindalou907
by Silver Member on Jan. 23, 2014 at 12:13 PM

Is she afraid of something? If so I would let her sleep on the floor in your room, but I wouldn't make it too comfortable, the goal is to get her back in her room. If she's just being obstinate I would smack her butt and put her back to bed EVERY time, she will learn. When she makes it through the night give her a small reward and let her hear you brag about her.

JoanahLee
by Member on Jan. 23, 2014 at 12:57 PM
4 moms liked this

Almost all of my young foster kids have been like this, and as fosters, most of them DO have a good reason to not be sleeping well or not want to stay in their bed.  Sometimes it just means we sleep less, but often even after they feel safe and settled they still get out of bed many times at night or early in the morning. 

We put a small rug (about the length of the bed and a couple feet wide) next to their bed, and put a basket of books and a basket of quiet toys on the rug.  The rule then becomes "Stay in your bed or on your rug".  If they cant sleep they can get up and play quietly on their rug.  We had to get up a lot the first few nights to help them remember to stay on the rug, but once they learned that there was a big reward in the morning for staying put and not waking anyone up we usually don't have any more problems. 

I use dibbs ice cream bites for rewards becasuse, really, whats more awesome than ice cream before breakfast! 

I would be afraid to spank my kid for getting out of bed because I don't want them to be afraid to wake me up if there is an actual problem in the night. 

strictmomhere
by Platinum Member on Jan. 23, 2014 at 1:04 PM
I agree with this:)

Quoting Lindalou907:

Is she afraid of something? If so I would let her sleep on the floor in your room, but I wouldn't make it too comfortable, the goal is to get her back in her room. If she's just being obstinate I would smack her butt and put her back to bed EVERY time, she will learn. When she makes it through the night give her a small reward and let her hear you brag about her.

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KDsMommy28
by on Jan. 23, 2014 at 2:46 PM
She isn't acting like she is scared of something. The girls share a room and she does love being in bed with her sister or its just the bed. When we go in her room because she has gotten up, she's playing with toys. We can reprimand her over and over but she acts like it does nothing to affect her.

Quoting strictmomhere: I agree with this:)



Quoting Lindalou907:

Is she afraid of something? If so I would let her sleep on the floor in your room, but I wouldn't make it too comfortable, the goal is to get her back in her room. If she's just being obstinate I would smack her butt and put her back to bed EVERY time, she will learn. When she makes it through the night give her a small reward and let her hear you brag about her.

countrygirlkat
by Kathleen on Jan. 23, 2014 at 10:43 PM

I think this is very good advice.  Often it is just that new sense of freedom that has them up and down.  If they learn that they can have the freedom to make a choice of the rug or the bed then they will be more likely to choose that over wandering.  Good luck. 

Quoting JoanahLee:

Almost all of my young foster kids have been like this, and as fosters, most of them DO have a good reason to not be sleeping well or not want to stay in their bed.  Sometimes it just means we sleep less, but often even after they feel safe and settled they still get out of bed many times at night or early in the morning. 

We put a small rug (about the length of the bed and a couple feet wide) next to their bed, and put a basket of books and a basket of quiet toys on the rug.  The rule then becomes "Stay in your bed or on your rug".  If they cant sleep they can get up and play quietly on their rug.  We had to get up a lot the first few nights to help them remember to stay on the rug, but once they learned that there was a big reward in the morning for staying put and not waking anyone up we usually don't have any more problems. 

I use dibbs ice cream bites for rewards becasuse, really, whats more awesome than ice cream before breakfast! 

I would be afraid to spank my kid for getting out of bed because I don't want them to be afraid to wake me up if there is an actual problem in the night. 


BmoreRavens
by Bronze Member on Jan. 24, 2014 at 12:22 AM
1 mom liked this

Would you be able to relax and fall asleep right after someone hit you?!! STOP, the spanking. 

I like poster Joanahlee's ideas (such a sweet mama), with the exception of using food for a reward in the morning.

I just don't like using anything that you eat as a reward or punishment, but I do think that a non-food reward is a nice idea.

It could be the child putting a star on a chart, daily, and a small prize at the end of the week for the child staying in her room every night.


MountieMama
by Member on Jan. 24, 2014 at 8:29 AM
Can you lock her in her room? And take everything besides the bed out ? This is how we first transitioned our son. He got up a time or two and cried at the door but after our only response was nothing or just putting him back to bed he stops.

Or if you can... Buy a fun bed. Once my son figured out his corvette bed had working head lights.. Well I usually have to go get him in the morning because he's been playing for 20-30 minutes on his bed.
Pnukey
by Bronze Member on Jan. 24, 2014 at 9:34 AM

If she is quietly playing in her room, I don't see the problem. DS had this issue. We taught him to stay in his room until the sun came up and that it is OK to play quietly. You can sleep in a few years when they are older.

fullxbusymom
by Member on Jan. 24, 2014 at 11:18 AM
3 moms liked this

You do your bedtime routine lay her down,

1st time she gets up you say it is bedtime and place her back in her bed,
2nd time no eye contact say it is bedtime. 
3rd time simply keep placing her back, NO eye contact or Communication and you do this no matter how many times she gets up even if it is 100x's.

Your resolve has to be stronger than hers. 

A few days of this and she will realize you are not playing she gets nothing out of getting out of bed since their is no communication and they just learn bedtime is bedtime. 

bellydancer1984
by Member on Jan. 24, 2014 at 3:05 PM

my younges is close to that age we have the same problem i find that if she gets a good early nap she is a lot better about bed time..

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