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i love my son but he is driving me crazy!

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Ok so my almost 5 year old's personality seems to have recently changed. Typically he is a good child, polite, nice but has his moments like any child does. Recently hes turned very nasty, hits, thinks he can do whatever he wants, myself and df could tell him no he will do it anyway. He will jump or be rough with the dogs, lay on the jump on them, he turns into a total prick. I hate saying it but he's been turning into a prick asshole brat. I get testing boundaries but its like hes reverted backwards.he is potty trained but for some reason decided revently he wasnt going to pee in the toilet but all over the seat and inside of the lid. So unless you look youre ass is getting soaked. Not something he would typically do. He also for some reason unless it just happens he refuses to poop in the toilet. He will hold it all day and no exaggeration we go through our usual bed time routine read a bed time story and within 2 minutes of me sitting down in our living room. He will come out of his room and say he needs to be cleaned up bc he pooped in his pull up. Making him wear regular underwear doesnt work either, he will hold it. I don't get it, he has done it before why wont he just do it. Df and i are at our wits end. Im so sick of getting beyond angry bc of how he's acting
by on Jun. 23, 2014 at 6:51 PM
Replies (11-20):
BratPunk
by Member on Jun. 24, 2014 at 11:15 AM
Kindergarten has been the big thing, telling him he needs to listen etc so he can go to school. He has a friend who is 6 months older than him, who we use as an example for things like pooping on the potty etc. Could it possibly be related to going to school, but he does express excitement towards it. df and i have always talked about our wedding on and off. I know some of the stuff he is definitely doing itintentionally, like pooping in his pull up

Quoting terpmama: Sorry, I meant his own emotional upheaval (friend moved away, someone died, being bullied somewhere...) or something else that had made him feel "out of control of his life"... Have there been any changes recently (even minor ones can add up) wedding talk perhaps?
Quoting BratPunk:

"bad touching" definately not happening.  his father wont even give him a bath/shower - never has since he was born.  no new adults/people.  in terms of emotional - we have argued recently but there has never been any issues prior so doesnt make sense its starting now.

Quoting terpmama: Has he been around any new adults? Potty accidents (cropping up out of te blue) could signal "bad touching". The anger and feeling uncontrollable (this acting out so that there are external controls) may point to bullying or some other emotional upheaval.... I'd definitely see a doc and child therapist.

happynewyorker
by Member on Jun. 24, 2014 at 11:23 AM

some times children's behavior changes because they are dealing with things that they can't deal with.

did anyone come over that you noticed the behavior?  Did something scare him about the toilet or going to the bathroom?  That sometimes happens and children won't go because someone said or scared him.  Did he see a scary movie?

sometimes knowing that at age 5 and growing up, can be scary. If he doesn't attend school does he know that he's going in August or September? 

Have you mentioned or said oh your almost 5.  help with the groceries, things that positive to him.  Making him feel good? 

do you do time out? punishment, no tv, no playing with the dogs, things that he likes so much. 

Do you think he wants to be a baby again??  if he does play the game also.  Oh, you can't play with the dog, your too young.  Oh, you have to use a diaper only big boys use the potty, toilet.  Things like that.

A lot of times when I have problems with my daughter, I would mentioned it to her doctor. She gives me good advices all the time.  My daughter would pretend she was a baby.  So, I made sure if she was going to act like that.  I was going to keep at it until she acted her age again.  She stoped it at one.

You having a baby or had a baby by any chance? 

 

boys2men2soon
by Member on Jun. 24, 2014 at 11:36 AM

I agree with the others....   Something is wrong.   It may be his uncertainty about starting school.    I would talk to his Pedi.

When he poops in his pull up at night.... make him clean it up.    When he pee's on the seat.... make him clean it up.  

VinVanMom
by Member on Jun. 24, 2014 at 11:47 AM

I would look into family counseling. Try really cheerleading when he does good stuff. Does he have friends his age? Does he see them peeing and pooping in the potty? Being good? Do oh ou have a reward system? Maybe it's something emotional. I don't know him but maybe he has a mental issue developing. Is he ok with your fiancĂ©? Does he see bio dad? When he talks what does he say frustrates him? Has he been to preschool? If not he might not be at a five yo level with social stuff. 

BratPunk
by Member on Jun. 24, 2014 at 1:19 PM
We do cheerlead and he knows it bc he knows we get happy weve done a reward system but hes too smart for it.my fiance is his dad. No pre k again too smart not going to spend $3k+ a month for pt pre k. No he doesn't see his friend going to the bathroom. He's practically alway there when myself or his dad go. He can articulate well just takes a while sometimes.

Quoting VinVanMom:

I would look into family counseling. Try really cheerleading when he does good stuff. Does he have friends his age? Does he see them peeing and pooping in the potty? Being good? Do oh ou have a reward system? Maybe it's something emotional. I don't know him but maybe he has a mental issue developing. Is he ok with your fiancĂ©? Does he see bio dad? When he talks what does he say frustrates him? Has he been to preschool? If not he might not be at a five yo level with social stuff. 

BratPunk
by Member on Jun. 24, 2014 at 4:15 PM
Hes not in prek now but does know he is going in September and is excited. Almost everyday says he wants to go to school and see his yeachers and learn. If you ask his to help with anything he typically will. Almost everytime we tell him to go on the potty to make pee pees and poopies he'll immediately say no just pee pees. No issues with the toilet otherwise. Until recently peeing on the toilet. Discipline wise take away ipad, time out, and no no siblings on the way yet

Quoting happynewyorker:

some times children's behavior changes because they are dealing with things that they can't deal with.



did anyone come over that you noticed the behavior?  Did something scare him about the toilet or going to the bathroom?  That sometimes happens and children won't go because someone said or scared him.  Did he see a scary movie?



sometimes knowing that at age 5 and growing up, can be scary. If he doesn't attend school does he know that he's going in August or September? 



Have you mentioned or said oh your almost 5.  help with the groceries, things that positive to him.  Making him feel good? 



do you do time out? punishment, no tv, no playing with the dogs, things that he likes so much. 



Do you think he wants to be a baby again??  if he does play the game also.  Oh, you can't play with the dog, your too young.  Oh, you have to use a diaper only big boys use the potty, toilet.  Things like that.



A lot of times when I have problems with my daughter, I would mentioned it to her doctor. She gives me good advices all the time.  My daughter would pretend she was a baby.  So, I made sure if she was going to act like that.  I was going to keep at it until she acted her age again.  She stoped it at one.



You having a baby or had a baby by any chance? 



 

gtubemommy2012
by New Member on Jun. 25, 2014 at 3:30 AM
1 mom liked this

I know a lot of the other moms are saying someone might be hurting him....but that might not be. Don't freak out about that unless he shows other signs of real abuse.

What it sounds like to me is....constipation.

It would explain him waiting till he is lying down to poop, also his saying he "can't" poop...it might literally be too hard and hurting his bottom!!! So he just holds it...cuz it hurts.

This would make anyone a raging a$$hole (hehehe) trust me, when a little kid is constipated but doesn't know how to say it they are irritable, lash out at others, and pooping less often, or on a weird schedule.

Try getting him to drink a liter of Pedialite (per day) on top of his usual water/milk/juice and cut back on added salt...maybe give this a week before jumping to abuse conclusions without any confirmation from him.

poisonedtaco
by on Jun. 25, 2014 at 10:05 AM

 Has he gone through something new? Is he starting kindergarten this coming up year? My daughter went through a terrible year right before she started kindergarten. She's always had some behavior issues but it was just completely awful before she started school. Once she started school though, things got so much better. I think it was the routine. Have you change a routine? Do you have a routine for him? Good luck!

MomofGrown1
by on Jun. 25, 2014 at 10:11 AM

 I think there is something else going on, maybe some changes in your household recently that he doesn't know how to verbalize. I would talk to his doctor. A drastic change in an otherwise "normal, good" child does not happen for no reason. Good Luck.

emarin77
by Bronze Member on Jun. 25, 2014 at 12:26 PM

Have him evaluated mom from a child psychologist.  How is he doing in school?

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