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Friend breast fed 5 year old in front of my 9 year old on a play date.

Posted by on Jul. 17, 2014 at 12:44 AM
  • 294 Replies
2 moms liked this

So I am all for moms breast feeding their babies, heck I would have gone much longer if I could have, so this is not a post against breast feeding. But there should be some boundries even if you are in your own home. This friend I made in a breast feeding support group when our oldest were babies invited my daughter to play, I dropped her off and went to run errands. When my DD came home she told us she was watching TV with her friend when the little sister came into the family room naked, sat down and demanded a drink.  Mom came in and pulled up her shirt-no warning, no asking the girls to excuse themselves, no warning. I know she is in her home, but She invited My daughter, we did not just show up. Is this something I now need to call my friend about? She often finds a "secluded" place at our dance studio when the child demands a drink and tries to cover up, but this was a bit to much for my daughter. How should I handle this? We have explained that it is OK for DH to simply say she in not comfortable with the situation and go into another room or even to call us to come get her. We are not prudes or against BF, just the casual way she does it. Thanks!

Update: Friend asked my daughter over again, and exchanged emails (she was at work and not able to talk), trying to avoid having DD go to their house, including inviting them to my house or me joining them, but I would not have been able to stay the whole time. Finally emailed how my DD felt and she responded, almost apologizing and how she will handle things differently. Would have preferred to speak in person but we have not crossed paths yet. Glad I have picked the right people to be friends with, someone with manners and cares about her guests. Glad this is resolved.

by on Jul. 17, 2014 at 12:44 AM
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by New Member on Jul. 17, 2014 at 12:47 AM
16 moms liked this

she's in her own home.. its your daughter and you that need to decide if you can accept that

by Member on Jul. 17, 2014 at 12:48 AM
4 moms liked this
It's her house. I'd most likely tell my child Rio just excuse themselves if it makes them uncomfortable.

Although I'm not sure about a 5 year old running around naked either.
by Platinum Member on Jul. 17, 2014 at 1:37 AM
1 mom liked this
What did your daughter say?
by Silver Member on Jul. 17, 2014 at 1:40 AM
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I agree with the others.  If you are uncomfortable, I'd just not do any more playdates over there.  Five is too old in my opinion, but it's her body and her choice. 

by on Jul. 17, 2014 at 2:02 AM
19 moms liked this
Her home, her body, her child, her choice. It's your problem if you have an issue with it. You 'handle it' by getting over yourself, and if it bothered you that much, not going back over there.
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by Bronze Member on Jul. 17, 2014 at 2:06 AM
10 moms liked this

Get over it. They're just breasts. One day your daughter will have breasts of her own. The more you make a fuss about this the worse your daughter will feel.

by Ruby Member on Jul. 17, 2014 at 2:16 AM
44 moms liked this
Yuck, my kid would never go there again. There is no reason to breast feed a 5 year old kindergartener.
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by on Jul. 17, 2014 at 7:14 AM
29 moms liked this

I've never breastfed, my kids aren't biological.  I'm most certainly not against it.  But I see something wrong with parents breastfeeding their children at such late ages.  I feel like that's teaching the child to be clingy & dependent on Mommy.  You feed from your tit while they're babies because that's all their tummies can handle and also because they can't actually feed themselves.  At 5, the kid could go make herself a sandwich. Yes, there's also the nutritional value, but is that really that irreplaceable and important?  What about your child's emotional stability?  Don't you want them to be healthy, normal, & mature later?

...and she lets her kid run around naked?  None of that sounds kosher to me.  I like to be naked too.  I sleep naked.  I used to walk around the house naked, cook naked, etc. before I had kids and I enjoyed it.  But when you have other people in your home, it becomes inappropriate, especially people you barely know--whether it's a child or not.  In fact, I think especially if you're a child because there are some serious sickos out there.  What kind of mother would let her daughter run naked through the house in front of somebody she met online and barely knows?  And thinks this behavior is okay to do in front of another child?

Very, very questionable...

by on Jul. 17, 2014 at 7:20 AM
19 moms liked this

if you met in a BF support group, she most likely thinks you share her support of extended BF.  

I would not make a big deal of it at all.  if your daughter asks, just let her know different families have different parenting ideas.  You choose to stop when they were babies, this Mom thinks they still benefit as little kids.

She does not owe you any explanation. She didn't do anything harmful to your daughter.

by Mom2boys on Jul. 17, 2014 at 9:32 AM
10 moms liked this

My 8 year old would say, "Mom, someone else nurses like you!"  It is no big deal in our house though.

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