Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Parent fail -_-

Posted by on Dec. 25, 2014 at 12:26 AM
  • 18 Replies
1 mom liked this
DD is 18 months old and goes to her dad's on weekends. She came home a few weeks ago saying "Oh shit!" She usually(since she started a few weeks ago) says it if there's a sudden loud noise but, has started saying it when she drops her bottle. I had her saying "uh-oh" for these kinds of things and now I can't get her to stop cussing. It's just the one phrase.

This week she came home from her dad's and started biting. She's never bit anyone before. She left a bruise tonight. It seems like she's always coming back from her dad's with a new bad habit or illness(she's only gotten colds at his house and he gives her lactose, despite knowing she's intolerant) and it pisses me off.

Any advise on curbing the bad behavior or examples of things that worked for you?
by on Dec. 25, 2014 at 12:26 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Lindalou907
by Silver Member on Dec. 25, 2014 at 3:35 AM

Can you somehow get her Dad to cooperate? The colds she's going to get anyway at some point, but the potty mouth and the dairy is annoying, ask him nicely, say "I need to ask you a couple of favors" then, if you cant get his cooperation I guess you could ask the courts to intervene, or tell him you are going to ask for supervised visitation.

MusherMaggie
by Silver Member on Dec. 25, 2014 at 8:52 AM
1 mom liked this
Remove the bottle when she curses; it's really not a good idea for her to still be drinking from one at this age because it causes tooth and jaw malformations.
amantonacci
by Member on Dec. 25, 2014 at 8:55 AM
1 mom liked this
The swearing is most likely a faze the same with the biting just keep redirecting her and letting her know the bad words are not ok
HAHuskey
by Member on Dec. 25, 2014 at 10:26 AM
She usually only gets them at night. I have to buy a few more sippy cups. I've been slowly switching them out. She only has 3 bottles left.

Quoting MusherMaggie: Remove the bottle when she curses; it's really not a good idea for her to still be drinking from one at this age because it causes tooth and jaw malformations.
MrsRA
by Member on Dec. 26, 2014 at 8:14 PM

Ideally, you could get dad to cooperate with you. It always works better if both parents work together for the good of the child. But sadly, that doesn't always happen. You may have to deal with these things on your own. Let him find out for himself that the dairy isn't agreeing with her. As far as the bad words, when she says it, just say "Mommy doesn't like those bad words" and turn and walk away from her. Just be consistent with that and she'll stop the bad words. 

I don't know, the lactose intolerent thing is bothering me though. Why should your dd have to suffer because her dad doesn't want to follow through. I'd have a serious talk with him about her medical needs. He really needs to have some concern for her feeling well. 

If you can't get him to cooperate with you now, it'll be a long road ahead. But lots of parents do it. So you just do the best you can with the situation your in. 

HAHuskey
by Member on Dec. 26, 2014 at 8:55 PM
1 mom liked this
I've "scolded" him several times about it. I just found out that he's had a girlfriend that he's been lying about. I met her last weekend to explain her Spina Bifida because what we're suppose to watch for is important. When I mentioned dd's allergy, she said "oh ok!!" Like he hadn't told her about it. So it may have been her giving dd milk. Hopefully that stops it. Even if he was the one giving it, she may stop him now that she knows.

Quoting MrsRA:

Ideally, you could get dad to cooperate with you. It always works better if both parents work together for the good of the child. But sadly, that doesn't always happen. You may have to deal with these things on your own. Let him find out for himself that the dairy isn't agreeing with her. As far as the bad words, when she says it, just say "Mommy doesn't like those bad words" and turn and walk away from her. Just be consistent with that and she'll stop the bad words. 

I don't know, the lactose intolerent thing is bothering me though. Why should your dd have to suffer because her dad doesn't want to follow through. I'd have a serious talk with him about her medical needs. He really needs to have some concern for her feeling well. 

If you can't get him to cooperate with you now, it'll be a long road ahead. But lots of parents do it. So you just do the best you can with the situation your in. 

DaringDo
by on Dec. 26, 2014 at 9:13 PM
1 mom liked this
I just went cold turkey with my dd. I threw all her bottles away and she cried for a day then got over it.

Quoting HAHuskey: She usually only gets them at night. I have to buy a few more sippy cups. I've been slowly switching them out. She only has 3 bottles left.

Quoting MusherMaggie: Remove the bottle when she curses; it's really not a good idea for her to still be drinking from one at this age because it causes tooth and jaw malformations.
hargonagain
by Member on Dec. 27, 2014 at 7:51 AM
When my son was 1 he kept biting the topsoff the nipples so I decided that he was done with the bottle. When he bit another one off I told him the bottle broke and had him throw it away. He never drank from a bottle again.
APunchInTheFace
by New Member on Dec. 27, 2014 at 8:13 AM
1 mom liked this
If dad isn't going to cooperate and do some pretty simple common sense things, then I'd pull his visits from him.

I don't play games when it comes to sending my girls with their dad. He either does what I say or he doesn't see the kids (its in my court order, that I have full power to do so) so that's what I do!

Every time she says it, put her on a timeout, every time she bites put her on a time out. Redirect her and explain to her only Animals bite, not people. Just keep explaining it to her and using time outs, she'll get it eventually!!!!
cecily727
by on Dec. 27, 2014 at 9:35 AM
3 moms liked this

I think that you and dad need to have a serious sit down and try to do it without appearing to p.o'd, try to keep as much emotion out of it as possible, like we need to sit and talk some plans for baby.    Try to educated him about stuff, make it seem like that at least, like you guys are having a problem solving session...Just remind him that baby will imitate what he says and though it may be hard, he can make an effort to change the "oh shit" to something else..that was an issue with my son, and I admit that I was a guilty cussing party.   As for the lactose issue.   I think a lot of people really don't get it.  It is out of ignorance.   Continue to impress this upon, have him join you for a pediatrician's visit and ask the ped to really emphaize it.  Also perhaps you can send some lactaid drops and let him know that if he just they are there just in case.   I had an ex who was very defensive, ignorant, etc. and I found that kind of framing things as "what do we need to do for baby" kind of problem solving made him much more willing to cooperate.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)