Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

advice for leaving my boyfriend

Posted by on Apr. 20, 2016 at 11:55 AM
  • 36 Replies
1 mom liked this
I really need some good advice. I've decided that it's time that I leave my boyfriend of 10 years. We have 2 kids together, almost 7 and 2, but I just can't do this anymore. Every day I do something wrong, like a little kid gets into trouble with their father. But no matter whether I actually did do something wrong or not it's always my fault. And because it's my fault Im stupid, dumb, bitch, dirty, ignorant ect... I have to do everything! Even though I work full time, laundry, dinners, and housework and nothing is shared. His responsibility outside work never gets done. He is too tired or has plans. I'm just very done. Financially I probably cant afford to move out till next February, but I have to hold the peace till then. But does anyone have any advice for me? Things that helped get you out?
by on Apr. 20, 2016 at 11:55 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
SweetLuci
by Platinum Member on Apr. 20, 2016 at 2:04 PM
1 mom liked this

Save all the money you can, keep it in a secure account that he doesn't know about. Have a plan if you have to leave suddenly.

lovingmommy4316
by on Apr. 20, 2016 at 2:16 PM
1 mom liked this
This !
Also get a credit card in your name only and don't let him know. Use it for emergencies, like a hotel or gas , in the case of needing to get out quick like she said. And talk to help agencies. They may have resources for you to leave sooner. It sounds like verbal & mental abuse to me. Which to me are the same as physical abuse.


Quoting SweetLuci:

Save all the money you can, keep it in a secure account that he doesn't know about. Have a plan if you have to leave suddenly.

Dmaguilar
by Member on Apr. 20, 2016 at 2:30 PM
Yeah. I was thinking of opening a savings account at a different bank. But really I can only save about 25 a check with out taking away from others bills or him noticing.

Quoting SweetLuci:

Save all the money you can, keep it in a secure account that he doesn't know about. Have a plan if you have to leave suddenly.

virginiamama71
by Gold Member on Apr. 20, 2016 at 2:31 PM
3 moms liked this

 Leave today. If you are this tired after 10 years why wait until next year to leave?

go to a shelter. Most shelters allow 89 days to stay. You can save during that time and they will have resources to help you get started on your own.

Dmaguilar
by Member on Apr. 20, 2016 at 2:33 PM
Hmm. I can't really get a credit card I've tried. But my credit is pretty much destroyed. I can only get a secured credit card.

Quoting lovingmommy4316: This !
Also get a credit card in your name only and don't let him know. Use it for emergencies, like a hotel or gas , in the case of needing to get out quick like she said. And talk to help agencies. They may have resources for you to leave sooner. It sounds like verbal & mental abuse to me. Which to me are the same as physical abuse.


Quoting SweetLuci:

Save all the money you can, keep it in a secure account that he doesn't know about. Have a plan if you have to leave suddenly.

Zizzick
by New Member on Apr. 20, 2016 at 2:36 PM
1 mom liked this
Just leave now. I left an abusive relationship last January with my kids, a handful of clothes, a cancer diagnoses, and $140 in my pocket and never looked back. just over a year later and I've never been happier.

Dmaguilar
by Member on Apr. 20, 2016 at 2:39 PM
I've never thought of going to a shelter. I've always thought those should be saved for those who really need. While he is definitely mean, I do not fear for my life or my childrens life. He wouldn't kick me out of the house either.... But I need to make a clean financial break so I can pay to get out and not leave to wear he can hold things over my head.

Quoting virginiamama71:

 Leave today. If you are this tired after 10 years why wait until next year to leave?


go to a shelter. Most shelters allow 89 days to stay. You can save during that time and they will have resources to help you get started on your own.

la_bella_vita
by on Apr. 20, 2016 at 2:47 PM

Wow, I don't blame you, I would be packing my bags as well. I've neer done this but I would start saving now. It will be bad at first but it will get better. Best wishe

sanj1213
by on Apr. 20, 2016 at 2:50 PM
Well if you've stayed for 10 years I guess another one won't hurt. In this time you should get your own bank acct with only your name and start saving everything you can.
ready4happiness
by Member on Apr. 20, 2016 at 2:57 PM
1 mom liked this
Have you looked into low income housing in your area? There are programs to help people in your abusive situation. Your kids don't need to hear mom being tore down every day by dad. I'm sorry. Just my opinion but kids do mock what they see and hear.
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)