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Why I am the bad person

Posted by on Oct. 27, 2016 at 2:55 PM
  • 32 Replies
Please someone explain how I am a bad mom? My daughters dad and grandparents have emailed me since the accusations that have came out and they have are saying now Im being a horrible mom, due to I wont let me daughter to her dad's for the weekend, I'm sorry that I dont want my daughter around her dad that might be touching her inappropriate, or even watching porn while she sets beside him, or even sleeps in his bed when she has her own bed. Im the one that has to deal with the wondering and praying its not happening, Im looking out for my child. But than again he is the one that hasnt emailed or called except one time and not once did you even ask how she was doing or even ask if I have gotten her looked at, all he has done is cussed me and tell me Im a horrible mom.


Can someone please tell me what Im supposed to do and please tell me if im wrong or what

I HAVE GOTTEN HER CHECKED AND WITH HER AGE AND SHE DOESNT TALK, ITS HARD TO TELL AIF ANYTHING HAS HAPPENED, THE DOCTOR HAS REFERRED HER CASE TO DFCS SO WAITING FOR THEM TO CALL AND SET UP A MEETING WITH THEM, ALONG WITH TALK TO THEM ABOUT VISITATION AND SUCH, THERE WAS A COURT ORDER VISITATION BUT IT ENDED IN SEPTEMBER DUE TO A TPO BEING DROPPED, AS OF NOW THERES NO COURT ORDER VISITATION FOR HER, THE VISITATION IS ALL VERBAL AGREEMENTS, ALONG WITH EMAIL OF DAYS HE HAS ASKED FOR, BUT ITS NORMALLY WHEN ITS CONVENIENT FOR HIM TO GET HER.
by on Oct. 27, 2016 at 2:55 PM
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Replies (1-10):
lilmama8408
by Silver Member on Oct. 27, 2016 at 3:01 PM
Is there a court order? If there is unless they say you can withhold visits your on contempt.

If you suspect she's being abused you need to have her evaluated by professionals
anotherandree
by Inga on Oct. 27, 2016 at 3:05 PM

Unfortunately, this is true.  If you are withholding visits, you could lose custody and then she is with her father completely.  Have her evaluated by professionals.  They are trained to get the truth out in a non-threatening, non-leading way.  If it is true, then they will immediately make a call to the courts (they are mandated reporters), but if it isn't true then that should make you feel better.

Quoting lilmama8408: Is there a court order? If there is unless they say you can withhold visits your on contempt. If you suspect she's being abused you need to have her evaluated by professionals


Lilypie Breastfeeding tickers
Ally1988
by Member on Oct. 27, 2016 at 3:05 PM
She has been checked and they couldnt see much but with her age its hard to tell and right now she doesn't speak that good, they are sending her information over to dfcs and i am waiting to meet with them and see what my option's are with visitation and such, there also is no court order visitation, the visitation right now is all verbal and emails, nothing court ordered

Quoting lilmama8408: Is there a court order? If there is unless they say you can withhold visits your on contempt.

If you suspect she's being abused you need to have her evaluated by professionals
bettletimes
by New Member on Oct. 27, 2016 at 3:11 PM
You don't have a custody and visitation order?

Also I'm glad you are getting her looked at. Save all emails and messages from your ex and his family. You will need it.

Ally1988
by Member on Oct. 27, 2016 at 3:11 PM
She has been examed by doctors and they couldnt tell but with things that have happened in the past they have told me that its up to me if i let her go or not, theres no court order visitation, hasnt been since September due to a TPO being dropped.

Quoting anotherandree:

Unfortunately, this is true.  If you are withholding visits, you could lose custody and then she is with her father completely.  Have her evaluated by professionals.  They are trained to get the truth out in a non-threatening, non-leading way.  If it is true, then they will immediately make a call to the courts (they are mandated reporters), but if it isn't true then that should make you feel better.

Quoting lilmama8408: Is there a court order? If there is unless they say you can withhold visits your on contempt.

If you suspect she's being abused you need to have her evaluated by professionals

Ally1988
by Member on Oct. 27, 2016 at 3:14 PM
Theres no custoday or court order visitation, and she has been looked at im now waiting for dfc to call to talk to them about everything and see where i go from there, i have all emails from him and his family,

Quoting bettletimes: You don't have a custody and visitation order?

Also I'm glad you are getting her looked at. Save all emails and messages from your ex and his family. You will need it.

ablackdolphin
by Gold Member on Oct. 27, 2016 at 5:03 PM
Get a lawyer!!
SweetLuci
by Platinum Member on Oct. 27, 2016 at 9:38 PM

You're not a bad person. You should contact a lawyer to find our what you can legally do and not do. It's good that dcs is involved, but they can't help you with the legalities of this.

Alexsi1
by Bronze Member on Oct. 28, 2016 at 10:40 AM

Unfortunately, there isn't much you can do until DCF concludes their investigation. Do you have a lawyer? I'm assuming you have filed for divorce?

Quoting Ally1988: Theres no custoday or court order visitation, and she has been looked at im now waiting for dfc to call to talk to them about everything and see where i go from there, i have all emails from him and his family,
Quoting bettletimes: You don't have a custody and visitation order? Also I'm glad you are getting her looked at. Save all emails and messages from your ex and his family. You will need it.


Ally1988
by Member on Oct. 28, 2016 at 1:10 PM
I was never married to him.

Quoting Alexsi1:

Unfortunately, there isn't much you can do until DCF concludes their investigation. Do you have a lawyer? I'm assuming you have filed for divorce?

Quoting Ally1988: Theres no custoday or court order visitation, and she has been looked at im now waiting for dfc to call to talk to them about everything and see where i go from there, i have all emails from him and his family,

Quoting bettletimes: You don't have a custody and visitation order?

Also I'm glad you are getting her looked at. Save all emails and messages from your ex and his family. You will need it.

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