Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

A mothers advise?

Posted by on Feb. 24, 2008 at 10:33 PM
  • 12 Replies
Sooo here's the thing. I love my mother, we have a special bond that I don't know of anyone else having with their mother. She did a wonderful job raising me and my sister. She would be the first to tell you that we never once talked back to her or tried to sneak out or felt like we couldn't talk to her. Whenever she told us we couldn't do something or go somewhere we never got the excuse "because I said so." She always gave us a legitamate reason for why she said no. I have an always will respect her. Well heres the thing, while I'm at work she watches my son...for free.... I have tried to pay her but she refuses. She has been wonderful. My SO is away in the army and she helps me anyway she can. Well my son is 3 months old, and she told me the other day that she has started feeding him rice cereal mixed with my breastmilk, making it really soupy, and feeding it too him. And feeding him mashed bananas. I don't agree with this, I think he's too young. And it kinda upset me that she didn't ask me first. I asked her if she thought that maybe he might be a little young and she said that thats what she did with me when I was 3 months. All the advise she has given me so far has been golden. But for some reason this one is bothering me. Does anyone think that this is too young? He has been EBF since he was born. Do you think this could do him harm? I turned out ok, so why am I freaking?
by on Feb. 24, 2008 at 10:33 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
perfectmom20
by on Feb. 24, 2008 at 10:35 PM
theres nothing wrong with your baby eating it i started giving my son the gerber apple sauce when he was 2 months and doc said it was totally fine...but i do agree she have asked you or told you sooner that way if he were to get sick you know what he has eaten =]
sacdp29
by on Feb. 24, 2008 at 10:42 PM
I breastfed my son til he was 6 months old and my daughter til she was 4 months old.  I started my son on cereal about 4-5 months old, my daughter was about 5 months old. 
If you aren't sure, check with your baby's doctor and see what he/she says to do.  If you do not want your mother to do this feeding, tell her. 
I have a new grandbaby and I'm trying really hard not to go against her wishes, but it is hard not to give my 2 cents..lol
Your mom is just trying to help, I'm sure.  But this is your child and you should say how and what to feed him.

Good luck

 First Time Grandma...................I love it! 

    

justine520
by on Feb. 24, 2008 at 10:43 PM
most mothers say that its ok but if u ask the doctors they say to wait until hes 4 or 6 months old.  i started feeding my dd at 4 months she did ok.  but then again she still loves to eat. lol   just do what u feel is right. ur his mom n ur mom needs to respect that.  u would not be disrespecting her in any way.  well i wish u luck
justine a
austinsm0mmy
by on Feb. 24, 2008 at 10:44 PM
I don't think you're upset about what she did, more of how she did it.

First things first, your son is not going to be harmed by starting solid at 3 months, LOTS of people include me start at 3 months. I even spoke to my sons doctor about it and he told me that it would be fine, just DON"T put cereal in a bottle. 

As for your mother you need to seriously talk to her, start by telling her that you appreciate her and value her advice, help and support, but you would appreciate it if let you make the decisions for your son, regarding food, training, development etc.  tell her you are always open to her advice but that as its your son you need to be the one making the final decision, also make it clear how her doing this made you feel.  she probably didn't even realise you would feel like this but she won't know unless you talk to her.

the fact that she helpsn you so much and watchs your child for free does not change the boundries.  this is your child and your decision, thats not to say she can't offer advice and you can't take her advice but thats all it should be.
chocchpcooke
by on Feb. 24, 2008 at 10:59 PM
Thanks a lot guys,  I really appreciate the advise, like I said her advise is usually golden and she's never over stepped her boundaries before. I know she is only trying to help. I just can't figure out a way to talk to her with out hurtin gher feelings. She is very sensitive, and I don't want her to think I'm mad at her. Because I'm not. But when I play it over in my head It comes out wrong and I can see her thinking that she's done something wrong.
britchen1970
by on Feb. 24, 2008 at 11:01 PM
I think you are a wonderful mother and daughter. you respect your mother and that's great but you have a right to disagree as well. You are the mother know and I am shure your mom would feel like you. Try to tell in how much you appreciate what she does. That's the time when you can tell her all the things you just told us...then put your concern into a question like ...do you think he is to young....and then ...what do you think about that...
This will make her feel like she is still giving your a good advise. Then bring your concern across by adding ...maybe we should wait a bit...
I always listen to my instinct and usually that's the right thing ....you also have that motherly instinct now. Make shure your mom understands that, try to stay away from blaming her...good luck and I wish I had my mom to help me out the way your mom does.
chocchpcooke
by on Feb. 24, 2008 at 11:09 PM

Quoting britchen1970:

I think you are a wonderful mother and daughter. you respect your mother and that's great but you have a right to disagree as well. You are the mother know and I am shure your mom would feel like you. Try to tell in how much you appreciate what she does. That's the time when you can tell her all the things you just told us...then put your concern into a question like ...do you think he is to young....and then ...what do you think about that...
This will make her feel like she is still giving your a good advise. Then bring your concern across by adding ...maybe we should wait a bit...
I always listen to my instinct and usually that's the right thing ....you also have that motherly instinct now. Make shure your mom understands that, try to stay away from blaming her...good luck and I wish I had my mom to help me out the way your mom does.
Omgosh thank you so much that was very sweet of you. I will give what you said a try the next time I see her. Again thank you.
hammes_cj
by on Feb. 26, 2008 at 9:27 AM
i agree completely.  i started feeding all 3 of my children cereal and such at 3 months old, but that was my decision.  im sure that w/ you and mother being so close if u sit down and tell her your wishes she will abide.  good mothers are always the ones we look to for advise, however, she needs to respect your wishes.  good luck!!!
cmlaurias
by on Feb. 26, 2008 at 9:32 AM
IMO, 3mo is too young for cereal and especially bananas (both are binding too).  Your breastmilk should give the baby everything he/she needs for now.   I'd be upset if I found out after the fact that my mother made a decision like that without my consent.  Things have changed since our mothers were parents & they've changed for good reason. 
  Have a great day!!  ~Christina
womom_24
by on Feb. 26, 2008 at 9:50 AM
I think you said it perfectly!
Quoting britchen1970:

I think you are a wonderful mother and daughter. you respect your mother and that's great but you have a right to disagree as well. You are the mother know and I am shure your mom would feel like you. Try to tell in how much you appreciate what she does. That's the time when you can tell her all the things you just told us...then put your concern into a question like ...do you think he is to young....and then ...what do you think about that...
This will make her feel like she is still giving your a good advise. Then bring your concern across by adding ...maybe we should wait a bit...
I always listen to my instinct and usually that's the right thing ....you also have that motherly instinct now. Make shure your mom understands that, try to stay away from blaming her...good luck and I wish I had my mom to help me out the way your mom does.
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)



Featured