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need a little advice poig

Posted by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 4:11 PM
  • 6 Replies

Me and my botfriend have been together for 8 months. We found out last week he leaves for Afghanistan in  March. He was planning on getting me a ring this month when his enlistment bonus came in....and thats great. But now he want to marry before he leaves and wants me to get pregnant (or try) before he goes. I said no, but he said if he doesnt make it back he want a child and a wife. Makes sense (a little) but i have a 19 month old from a previous relationship. Ive always told myself I wont have another one until Abe is potty trained. What do I do?? Do I fufill his wishes before he goes?? Or wait til he returns??

by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 4:11 PM
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Replies (1-6):
abesmommy522
by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 4:13 PM

bump

8firsttimemom8
by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 4:14 PM

do what you feel is right for you...cause if the worst happens and he doesn't come back then you are alone with two babies...but you two should talk about all the pro's and con's for trying for a baby before he leaves

MomToMags
by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 4:14 PM

I wouldn't do either until I was certain it was what I wanted - no need to rush - just my thought on it.

Good luck to you both and thank him for his service please :-)

Happy New Year !!!!!!


happy new year 2009

Blondee512
by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 4:17 PM

If he doesn't come back he wants a wife and child?

I would say no. You already have one.....you would be bound to his family forever, and that can cause many a hard feeling...especially if you moved on to another relationship, and considered letting someone else adopt the child.

I would consider marrying him....that's one thing. However, having a child in case he dies....nope.jmo

abesmommy522
by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 4:17 PM

I know i want to spend the rest of my life with him...he is the greatest. But I'm in the military also and could leave at any time, and if something happens to both of us...the kiddos are left without eaither of us

Quoting MomToMags:

I wouldn't do either until I was certain it was what I wanted - no need to rush - just my thought on it.

Good luck to you both and thank him for his service please :-)


MumsTheWord571
by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 4:19 PM

If you aren't ready for another baby it's not time. I wouldn't ascribe a time limit to having another like when he is potty trained, but more of when I feel emotionally ready for another. And like a PP said, if he doesn't come back it will be just you and 2 babies alone. Could you handle that?

I understand where he's coming from, but he needs to know your position too!

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