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how would you handle this...

Posted by on Apr. 8, 2009 at 3:28 PM
  • 23 Replies

So we moved to this new base almost a year ago, and just a few months ago I finally made ONE friend. Now, I've always been a little cautious when I make friends with Marine Wives, just incase I have to move or they do, I don't like to get to close. But anyway, I asked her one night to watch my kids, I was late picking them up, I tried really hard to appologize to her and I guess she's just never forgiven me. But I asked her today to watch my kids, and I ended up changing my mind, and forgot to call her. I got super busy running around with my husband and my kids, and apparently she has tried to call me and now I just checked my facebook and it says shes mad, and she hasn't said anything to me. So I don't fully know if shes made because I didn't call her, or something else.

But how do I talk to her now, I have to work with her on an event Saturday and I don't want her to ignore me, but honestly I feel like I didn't do anything wrong, other then forgetting to call her about her not having to watch my kids. But I don't think that is someting to be really mad about.

I don't know what to do. I don't want her to yell at me for not calling her because she made me feel horrible about picking up my kids late.

by on Apr. 8, 2009 at 3:28 PM
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Replies (1-10):
canthaveboys1
by on Apr. 8, 2009 at 3:30 PM

If she is that mad do you think she would answer the phone? Get on her facebook, and send her a message. Not on her wall of course but to let her know your sorry.  

YObando
by on Apr. 8, 2009 at 3:31 PM

honestly dont sweat it... if shes mad for something that small, then dont really waste your time on it. try to apologize and see how she acts... if anything try to do more stuff around the base to help you get to know more wives :) good luck

crazybreezy
by on Apr. 8, 2009 at 3:34 PM

i would try to call her. i mean she could have put her whole day on hold to wait for you to bring them over, so i can see how she might be upset.  if she doesn't want to talk, and if she just WANTS to be mad at you, even after yall talk it out dont sweat it. JMO

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Elkamelka
by on Apr. 8, 2009 at 3:36 PM

When someone is angry with me, I prefer they confront me personally; not on Facebook.  That being said, I can understand her frustration...I'm sure she set aside her day to watch your kids and you not calling her to cancel was rude (even if it was an honest mistake).  I would call her or stop by and apologize face-to-face.  If she doesn't want to forgive you, move on and make the best of you two working together at the event.  Also, I would not ask her to watch your kids again...sounds like you burned that bridge twice now, and I would not put yourself in that situation again.

gogogadgetgal
by on Apr. 8, 2009 at 3:39 PM

IMO, you were wrong. From her pov, it looks like you have no consideration for her. The first time she keeps your kids, you're late, then you forget to call & cancel when she agrees to keep them again.

It's inconsiderate on your part. Other people have lives too that are important. I'd call & try to smooth things over. Don't act like nothing happened though. That would probably backfire at a later point in time.  

MoodyMamma
by on Apr. 8, 2009 at 3:41 PM

I have to agree with this.

Quoting gogogadgetgal:

IMO, you were wrong. From her pov, it looks like you have no consideration for her. The first time she keeps your kids, you're late, then you forget to call & cancel when she agrees to keep them again.

It's inconsiderate on your part. Other people have lives too that are important. I'd call & try to smooth things over. Don't act like nothing happened though. That would probably backfire at a later point in time.  


ChristiMom2
by on Apr. 8, 2009 at 3:42 PM

Buy her a gift card at her favorite coffee shop. Put it into a card that apologizes for what happened and personally show up at her door and give it to her.

If someone did this to me, I'd be irked too. But, if they bought me coffee and sincerely apologized, I'd forgive and move on.

moms rock

YoungMarineWife
by on Apr. 8, 2009 at 3:43 PM


Quoting gogogadgetgal:

IMO, you were wrong. From her pov, it looks like you have no consideration for her. The first time she keeps your kids, you're late, then you forget to call & cancel when she agrees to keep them again.

It's inconsiderate on your part. Other people have lives too that are important. I'd call & try to smooth things over. Don't act like nothing happened though. That would probably backfire at a later point in time.  

honestly I don't feel like I was being inconsiderate. I understand, but honestly things change with the marine corps, and things change a lot with families. I know i should have called her, but I honestly forgot. I can't change the fact that I forgot. I will try to confront her but honestly, I agree with the responder who said that if she gets mad at me for something that small its not worth my time.

enmaynard
by on Apr. 8, 2009 at 3:44 PM

I have been in her shoes , and honestly I think she has a right to be a bit miffed at you. True friends don't keep themselves guarded just because they might move to another base. ( yes I am a marine wife) they are either your friend or not and they give a 100%. Maybe she feels like you have taken advantage of her friendship and only want her around to watch your children, other than that you don't really want to be her friend. Put yourself in her shoes.

If you really want to keep this friendship then I would send her an apologie via a card, or go over there personally and talk to her. It's not her job to save the friendship when she did nothing wrong.


I am a fun-loving, outdoorsey, dressage riding, anti-CIO, pro-spanking, pro-life, but deep down granola, homemade baby food making, sometimes co-sleeping, breast feeding and formula feeding only when there is no other option, Christian ( don't believe in religion but the relationship with my Heavenly father) Military life loving, try not to cuss and swear, mother of a 4 1/2 month old baby girl and a Marine Corp Wife. 
  ~Lovin my life as a Marine Wife~

charmgirl
by Bronze Member on Apr. 8, 2009 at 3:44 PM

I agree with this post...Like if you were going to babysit for someone, and they didnt show up or call and then didnt answer the phone...wouldnt you be mad?

Quoting gogogadgetgal:

IMO, you were wrong. From her pov, it looks like you have no consideration for her. The first time she keeps your kids, you're late, then you forget to call & cancel when she agrees to keep them again.

It's inconsiderate on your part. Other people have lives too that are important. I'd call & try to smooth things over. Don't act like nothing happened though. That would probably backfire at a later point in time.  


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