a bit of background...
my mom has lived in the same house for over 20 years, my sister and I basically grew up there and my mom and sis still live there; I moved on with my own family. Anyways, we have always been friends of this other family who has been our neighbors for over 15 years too. coincidentally, one of the daughters of this family and I share the same age, and the second daughter and my sister share the same age too, its funny. this daughter who is my age, we have been best friends forever, and she is still living in the same building with her mom, and she has an almost 1 year old boy. Well, she is a single mom, baby's daddy is out of the picture. She works very hard to support her son, including saturdays. Since my mother saw this girl grow up and loves her so much, my mom volunteered to babysit her son on Saturdays while she goes to work because her mom is working also.
well, this is the problem
one day my mom received the kid early morning and my friend's mom did not come to pick him up till night time, the bad thing is that she said she was in chucky cheese, having fun with her other grandchildren, while in the meantime, my mother is stuck at home taking care of the child, (she is not getting paid for it either). my mom thought it was not fair, she only does it so that my friend can work, not to have fun.
another day just to mention another example, my friend went to her house from work and apparently went to sleep, she had her mom watching the kid, well, her mom needed to go pick up her other daughter and instead of waking her daughter (baby's mom) up or takign the kid with her, she decided to call my mom up at 11pm and asked to watch the baby. I never got it, why can't the baby's mom watch her son? or if the baby is awake, why can't she take him with her.
its happen a few more times well she rather ask my mom than putting the kid in the car seat, and my mom is feeling upset, she doesn't find a way to tell her because like i said before, we have been best friends forever, and they have helped each other a lot for years and my mom is afraid of losing that friendship.
but I honestly think they are takign advantage of her, I don't know if my friend, the baby's mom is aware of this, because it only happens between her mom and my mom, and my friend is working,
I don't know what to do
any advice?
this sounds like a very difficult situation. i think your friend is definitely taking advantage of your mom's kindness and it is unfair. your mom has to set some ground rules and make it clear to your friend that she can't just drop him off anytime she feels like it. i know it's tough and it might put a strain on the relationship, but if your mom doesn't stand up for herself your friend is going to continue taking advantage of her. maybe your mom could say something like..."i really love watching your son on saturdays...he's a great kid...but we've got to keep it to saturdays because i'm so busy and tired from work. i wouldn't want to be watching your son unless i'm completely ready and alert." something along those lines? hope that helps...
i think so somw what. Your mom needs to learn to put her foot down. She needs to tell thenm that she will watch her ONLY if mom is going to work! Otherwise i would charge for babysitting if she needs to be watched any other time
yes she is being taken advantage of.Sadly your mom is allowing it. Your mom needs to set some hours that she is available and stick to them.She might also say something like I can only do this for a coulke more weeks then bow out.I think its awful that the other grandma uses your mom !!
Quoting lucky2Beeme:yes she is being taken advantage of.Sadly your mom is allowing it. Your mom needs to set some hours that she is available and stick to them.She might also say something like I can only do this for a coulke more weeks then bow out.I think its awful that the other grandma uses your mom !!
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on Jun. 3, 2009 at 6:07 PM