• In the Spotlight:
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

why do or dont you CIO? NO BASHING!

Posted by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 2:31 AM
  • 23 Replies
I hear just let her cry a lot I don't want a bash fest. I'm honestly wanting to know why someone would do that.
My reasons for not are one-it strains their lungs.2- theyre too young to manipulate they need something.3- it breaks my heart hearing her cry.5- I feel it will make them feel abandoned... my Dd (7 months) has co slept since birth because I wanted too I wanted that closeness. she's a very smart and active baby but I doubt she can manipulate me yet!

So I wanna know why you would let an infant 18 months or younger cry it out? Or why you don't.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 2:31 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
MajorsMommy
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 2:32 AM
Sorry meant 4. And sorry for any errors I'm mobile.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
AlliJadesmama
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 2:33 AM
I can't stand to hear her scream. It makes me anxious. And it makes me feel so bad like I'm neglecting her.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
stormystar15
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 2:34 AM
I dont. personally i feel that if he is crying he needs something whether it means wanting attention or cause hes teething. i cant stand to hear him cry its heart breaking.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MajorsMommy
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 2:34 AM
I agree! I just feel so bad, all she wants is you:(


Quoting AlliJadesmama:

I can't stand to hear her scream. It makes me anxious. And it makes me feel so bad like I'm neglecting her.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
alandou
by April on Jun. 4, 2011 at 4:14 AM

we did and it worked for us. to each their own.

Mom71307
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 8:34 AM

I will answer that I will NEVER let a child of ANY age CIO!  If they are crying, they need something!  Would you ignore an older child's yells for MOMMMY or DADDY?!  I don't think so.  Why would you ignore a younger, non-verbal child?!  If my children are having a temper tantrum because they don't get what they want, I tell them, "I understand you are very upset or angry but this is not a kind way to deal with those feelings.  When you can speak to me kindly, I will talk with you about your feelings." and I sned them to their room to finish the fit.  It takes about 2 seconds generally then we talk about it.  When it comes to bedtime (when most practice CIO), we respond to the crying or calls for us in a loving but sometimes stern manner so our children know we haven't abandoned them.  My husband has vivid memories of when he was quite young and he was crying in his bed and could see the cars in the driveway out the window but no one was coming... wonder what his tiny mind was thinking during that traumatic time!  I don't want my children to question whether I will come for them ever so I will respond lovingly to them.  My daughter is almost 4 and VERY smart... perfectly capable of manipulating us, however, she doesn't... we have a great relationsip and she is secure... no need to manipulate us in any way.  NO, I am not one of those blind moms who won't admit when something is up... I am a focused mom who pays attention to her children and deals with them promptly no matter what is going on!

ashleywagoner
by Platinum Member on Jun. 4, 2011 at 8:38 AM
I couldnt do it... I would rather be exhausted than make my baby cry and be afraid. He usually ends up in our bed... Lol
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Vix920
by on Jun. 4, 2011 at 8:42 AM

DS is 14 months old and we do not CIO. In the first few months, I believe it's extremely important not to in order to build his trust. Crying is the only way babies have to communicate, so you have to pay attention to them when they do. When DS starts talking more (he says some words now), I will encourage him to tell us what he's feeling if it seems like a tantrum or something. But especially at bedtime, I do not think CIO is a good method. I don't like going to sleep feeling sad or mad. Why should I make my son do that? I comfort him and sacrifice my own sleep for him. It's what my mom did for me, and I just think it's the correct thing to do as a parent.

la_bella_vita
by Bella on Jun. 4, 2011 at 11:12 AM
I have 3 kids and they have always been good sleepers. They have only cried when they needed something.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
la_bella_vita
by Bella on Jun. 4, 2011 at 11:12 AM
So basically it was something I never even needed to consider
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)