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I need some advice on an issue I have been losing sleep over. Anyone with experience regarding CPS

Posted by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:12 PM
  • 16 Replies

This may get a little lengthy but a little back story is required.

My husband and I host a weekly Sunday night football party.  It's not a huge event, 6-8 adults, and two kids including my own.  The couple who belong to the visiting toddler treat us like babysitters while they're here.  They literally do not move from their chairs the entire time that they are visiting.  If their son does something wrong they yell his name once and then carry on with doing absolutely nothing.  For informational purposes my daughter is 20 months and male toddler is 29 months.  I also babysit for him up to 3 days a week.

The week before last, male toddler was being weirdly violent.  He started wrapping his hands around my daughters throat and squeezing, and alternated that with shoving her down and punching her.  I seen this happen once and I personally put the male toddler in time out.  He kept doing it, and his parents didn't do a thing; just said his name once and kept on sitting.

Last week was my breaking point.  I heard my daughter scream in a not-happy-toddler way, and I ran to see what was going on, and seen male toddler with a screw driver over his head looking very much like he was going to stab her with it.  I think it was perfectly normal of me to react the way I did.  I put the fear of God into that little boy.  I did not spank him, but there was a whole lot of yelling on my part.  I got right into the business of both of his parents, told them that if they are not going to keep an eye on their child while they're here, then they are not invited any longer.  I told them what happened, and they simultaneously yelled his name,and did not move.  Luckily male toddler didn't act up for the rest of the evening.  I felt bad for scaring the bejesus out of the kid, so being the only person there that was willing to discipline him at all I sat him on my lap, told him I was sorry for yelling at him, but what he was doing was very wrong because someone could get hurt very bad.  End of story.

A few days later Mom-of-male-toddler calls me and let's me know that they don't want me watching him anymore because they don't want cps to take him away from them.  I was totally freaking confused by this logic.  I found out via male toddlers uncle who I am very good friends with, that they intend to call cps and report ME, for I don't know what.  I know that there is NO REASON to take my child away from me, so I'm not entirely worried about that.  I guess this was less about advice and more about venting.  Does anyone out there believe I should be worred about this?  I suppose I'm losing sleep over the fact that I have been friends with Mom-of-male-toddler since KINDERGARTEN, and she's willing to do that to my family for truley no reason whatsoever., when there are plenty of reasons for someone to suspect them of neglect.  Any words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated.
  

by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:12 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MumsTheWord571
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:15 PM
I have no suggestions or advice except to offer my sympathies. They sound like they're neglecting him and blaming you for actually protecting your DD & enforcing good behavior on their DS.
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grapejelly
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:23 PM

wow!  seems like they need to grow up and take some responsibility for their son..

PEEK05
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:23 PM

Agree :( *hugs*

Quoting MumsTheWord571:

I have no suggestions or advice except to offer my sympathies. They sound like they're neglecting him and blaming you for actually protecting your DD & enforcing good behavior on their DS.



joci2203
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:27 PM


Quoting MumsTheWord571:

I have no suggestions or advice except to offer my sympathies. They sound like they're neglecting him and blaming you for actually protecting your DD & enforcing good behavior on their DS.

this.


othermom
by Silver Member on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:44 PM

You did the right thing protecting your child and it sounds like you would have absolutly nothing to worry about if they called CPS. Something needs to be done to help their child though before he gets even more out of control. I would be thankful not to be babysitting him any more, your daughters safety is more important

bec94
by Member on Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:58 PM



Quoting PEEK05:

Agree :( *hugs*

Quoting MumsTheWord571:

I have no suggestions or advice except to offer my sympathies. They sound like they're neglecting him and blaming you for actually protecting your DD & enforcing good behavior on their DS.



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angela.bouchard
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 5:02 PM

 I agree with everyone else. Sorry hun.

troysmami
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 5:02 PM

DANG!!  ok well first  wat the heck is the little boy been watching that he learned that behavior.. i would have no problem NOT watchin him any more. and u have nothing to worry about  it should be U callin on them  this sounds like something CPS wont even look into  there are so many serious cases open right now , wat is this women gonna do say u yelled at her son for tryin to stab r little girl with a screw dirver?? shed be nuts to call and say that  worst case is CPS asks u about it.  and if thre is drinking at ur football parties when ur child is there make sure u keep it to a minimum and u r not drinking so if they every showed up at ur house ur completely sober and theres nothing they can say. im sorry ur friend turned out to be a mess

tamidawn
by Baroness on Nov. 26, 2011 at 5:03 PM
Wow, they sound like they have a guilty conscious. Sounds like they are the ones who should be worried, not you. Hugs, momma. You did the right thing.
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pinkcicle709
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 5:06 PM

 Id call the mom back & ask what her logic is...
Tell her your upset with the situation and your sorry for yelling at her son- but it wasnt the first time he caused with no reprimanding on their part

(Its one thing if hes being brat and not sharing- but physical abuse isnt okay even if its between two two yr olds)

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