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What should i do!

Posted by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 9:24 AM
  • 4 Replies

 Okay my daughter is almost 2 (May 13) and we are having a hard time getting her to listen to us! I mean about everything. We ask her to stop doing something (like throwing something at our faces) and she doesnt. We can be at a store and she will climb out of the cart and RUN away from us. Ive tried time outs, ive tried talking to her nicely, we even tried spankings. She doesnt want to listen to us at all no matter what it is. It can be her eating her dinner, stop messing with the dog. We were at the park the other day with a play group and she took off to run across the parking lot to my car! I was soo scared when she did that but shes sooo fast and im not a fast runner, the only people at the park was our play group but that isnt the point. i kept telling her to stop she was going to get hurt or someone would take her and she told me "okay," then went up to one of the new moms in the play group and asked to go home with that lady!  I mean i am sooo scared something is going to happen to her because she is soooo independent and does everythign on her own and doesnt care if i am by her side. Does anyone else have this problem or had this problem and what did you do to change it so your child listen to you?

by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 9:24 AM
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Replies (1-4):
jessicaaris
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 9:30 AM

I think every kids tries to test the limits. You just need to put your foot down. When my son was younger he didn't really respond to spankings but if you made him go to his room and sit on his bed he would HATE it, so when he started acting up that was his punishment. You just need to find something that works with her and stick to it.


edelweiss23
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 9:34 AM
Your child is 2. Expect 2 year olds to start pushing bounderies. My 2 year old does. I started putting him in a "timeout chair" and he hates it. It gets the job done. Only give your child 1 min per year of age for a time out punishment.
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chrsben
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 9:41 AM

 we have tried time out and it use to work but it doesnt any more. we made her put her nose in the corner and she hated it to begin with. but she thinks its funny now, we tell her no talking in time out and she listens to that but as soon as she gets out she back to bad stuff so she goes right back. I know shes goign to do what 2 year olds do but running away from me in public is just not cool and she doesnt care if a stranger picks her up

obx_Mom
by on Apr. 25, 2012 at 11:52 AM


Quoting chrsben:

 Okay my daughter is almost 2 (May 13) and we are having a hard time getting her to listen to us! I mean about everything. We ask her to stop doing something (like throwing something at our faces) and she doesnt.

IMO Here's problem #1 - she's 2 years old, so you can't really ask her to do something because that gives her a choice to do one thing or another. You are the parents, so you have to be the authority and tell her what she is going to do. She can choose which toy to play with, or if she wants orange or grape juice, or a pink or purple ribbon in her hair, but she needs to know that there are certain times when she does not have a choice. 

We can be at a store and she will climb out of the cart and RUN away from us. Ive tried time outs, ive tried talking to her nicely, we even tried spankings. She doesnt want to listen to us at all no matter what it is. It can be her eating her dinner, stop messing with the dog. We were at the park the other day with a play group and she took off to run across the parking lot to my car! I was soo scared when she did that but shes sooo fast and im not a fast runner, the only people at the park was our play group but that isnt the point. i kept telling her to stop she was going to get hurt or someone would take her and she told me "okay," then went up to one of the new moms in the play group and asked to go home with that lady!  I mean i am sooo scared something is going to happen to her because she is soooo independent and does everythign on her own and doesnt care if i am by her side. Does anyone else have this problem or had this problem and what did you do to change it so your child listen to you?

Its nothing personal. I'm not bashing you or saying you are a bad parent. It sounds like you are the type of person who likes to listen to both sides and reason with people. Over all that's a great quality, but you can't reason with a 2 year old. They haven't developed that skill set yet. The mind set of a 2 year old is - "I want what I want, and I'm going to do it until I have a good enough reason stop"

As much as they don't  think they want walls and boundaries, they need to know where their boundaries are, and she's pushing and feeling around trying to find them. Some kids (like my oldest one) has to run head long, full force and bang her head into the wall a few times before she stops, while my middle girl will stop just because you tell her to stop. My boy on the other hand has to have his hand or butt smacked a few times before he would stop, but eventually he would stop. 

My point being, you have to be consistant and firm. No has to mean no every time, and when she doesn't stop there has to be some sort of consequence. 

I think spanking should be used as a last resort and only if they are putting themselves in danger. I don't see (gently) popping the back of a child's hand as a spanking. 


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