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Offended by family comments

Posted by on Aug. 1, 2012 at 7:12 PM
  • 19 Replies

So, I was with my dad's family today (aunt, grandma, great-grandma, etc.) and we somehow managed to start talking about having more children. My aunt (38) and her husband (42) have two daughters a 4-year-old and a 16-month-old... I am 21 with a 10-month-old boy. I had asked if they were thinking about having another one, because they had mentioned it before... then joked "Ah, maybe it will be twins!" My great-grandma said that it could happen to me so I shouldn't be so rude, of course I responded, "As long as everyone is healthy, I wouldn't care. Twins would be a blessing."

Aunt responds, "You don't have a husband that works 75-80 hours, so you keep thinking that. When your husband starts working that much, you'll understand. I spend 95% of their waking hours with them."

I lost it at that. I am a stay-at-home mom as well. Okay, my husband works 40-50 hours per week, but he also works during the middle of the day and sometimes late at night. His weekends are 9am-9pm, which means he sees our son for approximately 30min in the morning. Also, she knew, before she had kids that her husband works that many hours. I guess, I just don't agree with the fact that everyone in my family always says that I don't do anything all day and yet she does. We both stay at home. However, I believe it is a blessing to be able to stay home with our son. I wouldn't trade it for the world. Sure, it is difficult at times, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't want to spend every minute I can with them.

Then again, I have always been the one everyone looks down on.

by on Aug. 1, 2012 at 7:12 PM
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Replies (1-10):
JaymeJ4
by on Aug. 1, 2012 at 7:20 PM
4 moms liked this

 i totally can relate to how how feel on this one. im a SAHM to 4 daughters, 10, 7, 2, and 4 months. So I have my hands full. He works and we are barely making it but we wouldnt be making it at all if we had to pay for day care. i LOVE being here with them. i used to work full time and i hated that i was missing so much. OH dont get me started on the "you dont do anything all day" ahhh that one kills me! Moms have the hardest and most important job in the world! dont let anyone tell you otherwise. your dads family sounds like mine! Keep your head up sweetie and enjoy your little one!

 

ddemarco
by on Aug. 1, 2012 at 7:33 PM

My family thinks I do nothing but sit on the computer all day.  Every thing I do is wrong in their eyes.  It's so frustrating.  I know how you feel!

lauratupper
by on Aug. 1, 2012 at 7:55 PM

(((hugs)))

RighteousLove
by on Aug. 1, 2012 at 8:04 PM

is an issue for me too. i relate. comes from both my side of the family and my husband's too. so the ignorance never runs short unfortunately. but for my husband's sake and also our childrens' sake i try to remain as calm as i can. and that's a hard enough task already. but i have to be positive. i do have a sweet family of my own to worry about. my husband loves me to much.

la_bella_vita
by Bella on Aug. 1, 2012 at 8:27 PM

 I'm frustrated because if I note any displeasure at my husband being on a business trip my family tells me how I should be thankful he has a job making enough to support me and the 4 children giving us a good life. of course, I'm thankful but that doesn't mean I don't miss him!!!

mommy2xp
by on Aug. 1, 2012 at 9:05 PM
1 mom liked this

My family knows I do a lot at home, dh's family some do some think I just sit around all day because my house is not spotless at all times. It's frustrating but I'm not trying to impress them, I do the best I can with housework I'd rather spend time with my kids than cleaning nonstop while they fend for themselves

MommyO2-6631
by on Aug. 1, 2012 at 9:49 PM
1 mom liked this
I'm sorry! Hugs!! I think being a stay at home mom is the hardest, most frustrating yet most rewarding and important job a woman can have! I think stay at home moms are like super woman... and they make it look easy lol
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kirstina
by on Aug. 1, 2012 at 9:52 PM

 I total know what your talking about.

lindsay122001
by on Aug. 1, 2012 at 10:30 PM
I think a lot of us Sahm know what that feels like. My parents are very supportive of me staying home. My mom even says she hated that she wasn't able to stay home with us 3 and to stay home as long as I can with dd. Don't let them bring you down. I think a lot time times people are jealous, or just want to be mean.
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Jmommy823
by on Aug. 1, 2012 at 11:17 PM
I'm not a SAHM but I know that it's difficult. Family can suck sometimes. They think because they're your family they can just say whatever they want
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