Everything in life comes down to math, and new motherhood is no exception. Think about it. You wonder how many hours it's been since your son last ate; what time your daughter woke up; and how many days it's been since you've had a shower. Numbers. They don't lie. And they definitely tell a story. So, here's a quick mathematical breakdown for new moms, and possibly a stroll down memory lane for moms with older kids. Here is new motherhood, broken down by the numbers.
1: Number of romantic dinners you and your partner will go out to in the first three months of your baby's life.
15: Number of times you will look at your phone at said romantic dinner for a text or missed called from the person watching your baby.
23: Number of times you will mention your baby at dinner.
2: Number of times you will watch a video of your baby on your phone at dinner.
7: Number of times you will check to see if your baby is breathing in the first week of bringing him or her home. Per day.
2: Number of times you will Google something pertaining to your baby each day during the first month.
3: Number of loads of laundry you will do each week.
45: Number of pictures you will take of your child each day.
10: Number of people who will receive at least one of these photos via text message each day.
0: Number of naps you will take each day when your baby is sleeping because there's so much stuff to be done! Stuff like look at all the pictures and videos you took.
245: Number of times you will kiss your baby each day.
3: Number of times each night you will check the volume on the monitor to make sure it's working.
125: Number of times per day that you will say things like "Who's that baby?" or "Who's a pretty girl?" in a high-pitched voice.
3: Number of times you will change your baby's outfit per day.
300: Number of times every day you will look at your baby and think to yourself, "I am so happy we did this."
Were you able to nap when your newborn napped?