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Should Daddy be waking up with Baby at night also?

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My little boy is 5 months old now and for the past 5 months I've had the luxury of being a stay-at-home-mom.

My son still wakes up about 3-4 times a night (some times more) and, since my husband works 10 hours a day at a mentally exhausting job, I have always gotten up with the baby every single time every single night.

But, I feel like, being a stay-at-home-mom is just as physically and mentally exhausting as his job except it's not just 10 hours a day, it's 24. I'm starting to wonder if maybe it's time my Husband starts waking up with the baby from time to time so that I can finally get some rest. I'm wondering if that sounds reasonable? And if so, is there a nonabrasive way to talk to him about it?

by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 12:39 PM
Replies (11-20):
by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 12:58 PM
Hubby wakes up at 4am to be to work at 5am. I let him sleep. When he gets home he usually takes baby and let's me nap for 2-3 hours.
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by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 1:03 PM

 My personal thought for us is if he's working then I'll be the one to get up. While I don't sit on my butt all day I am the one home. On the weekends he lets me sleep in a bit and he gets up with the kids in the morning. It's only like and extra hour, but I appreciate it.

by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 1:25 PM
1 mom liked this

Yeah..Besides maternity leave, we both work fulltime, so it really was only fair to split it.

Quoting lulu9209479:

So does mine, he usually does the first feeding and I do the second, I think it's only fair. And being home with a baby all day is exhausting, both physically and mentally. I work but only part time. When my dh is home, he helps out as much as he can

Quoting Megan11587:

Mine does. Before my son was sleeping through the night, we did shifts. If he woke up before 1:30, it was his turn, after 1:30, it was mine.  It worked for us because I go to bed pretty early, and he's usually up until at least 11, so I got a few hours of sleep in, then after 1:30, he got his sleep.

by Ruby Member on Dec. 11, 2012 at 1:27 PM
I've never asked DH to. As a SAHM, I can occasionally take naps, skimp on chores, or take an easy day when I don't get enough sleep. DH works 7 days a week, 5 of those days he works two jobs. There's no way I'd steal his 4-6 hours of sleep by making him take the baby at night too. But, I've also never had problems with a baby sleeping unless from a cold or shots.

That's not to say he doesn't get alone time with dd so that I can have a break. He does that daily. Just not in the middle of the night when he has to wake up at 5 AM to go to work.
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by Platinum Member on Dec. 11, 2012 at 1:58 PM

When our daughter was a baby,she was breastfed so it just didn't work for hubby to wake up with her.I was the only one that could nurse her so I did it.Plus,she very rarely ever woke up during the night.But on weekends he would get up with her in the morning while I slept and change her,get her dressed,and spend some time with her,and when she was older he'd feed her breakfast.It worked for us!

by Baroness on Dec. 11, 2012 at 2:02 PM
I bf so it would be silly I make dh get up at night with the baby.
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by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 2:03 PM

In the beginning, i was the only 1 to get up at night with my daughter because my husband was working construction 12-14 hours a day 12 days on 1 day off! He got 2 off days 1 week and took the baby without me even knowing so i could sleep. He helps me out a lot. Just tell your husband that you need some help and cannot do all of this on your own. He is your husband's child too, so he needs to help whether it be just feeding him so you can relax in the tub or take him so you can get some extra sleep

by Silver Member on Dec. 11, 2012 at 2:03 PM

Is this your first?   You can nap with her during the day... he can't.   My husband has never gotten up with our kids at night... he couldn't do anything for them and I'd have to wake up to wake HIM up anyway... so it's kinda pointless.   We just co-sleep, makes it much easier and everyone gets to sleep!

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by on Dec. 11, 2012 at 3:31 PM
I bf so i only get up in the middle of the night but on weekends i get one sleep in day and he gets one so we both get a little extra pn the weekends.... if we were bottle feeding though i would require him to wake up at least 1 night a week with him
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by Bronze Member on Dec. 11, 2012 at 3:39 PM
I don't make my husband wake up after the first few months
In the beginning I have him help with getting diapers and helping me get situated for nursing

I can(though it rarely happens) sleep during the day with my kiddos, and he can't

BUT he gets bad about expecting the house to look a certain way and some days it's just not possible
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