I guess this is a vent but im in tears and typing helps I guess. I really miss my life pre pregnancy. Don't get me wrong I love my son to death and he is my everything but I miss everything so much. Before I was in colorguard, spinning flags rifles and sabres, and I went to see a psychologist for my severe depression and severe social anxiety disorder. I really connected with her and I've been doing colorguard since I was on sixth grade. I had to stop seeing my psychologist to be able to see my ob and of course I can't do colorguard while pregnant and knew I wouldn't be able to do it my senior year because of the baby. My mom understands why this makes me upset but my bf really doesn't. It hurts even more now that my mom really tried behind my back to get my bf to one of my competitions because it meant so much to me but my bf made every excuse to not go and would not move his schedule around just to see my 5 minute show. I didn't know this until my mom accidentally told me while ranting of how he never tries. I just really miss what I had and my bf just doesn't sympathize or help and it upsets me because he hasn't had to give up anything. Gosh I really miss everything and I can't get it back!
on Jan. 9, 2013 at 8:17 PM