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Moms that work full time...

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How long after having your lo did you go back to work?
How did you handel leaving your lo?

I start a new job monday working full time and my dd is 8 weeks old...I keep getting really nervous and really don't want to leave her. Any advice?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 8:31 PM
Replies (41-50):
Emadele
by Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 8:54 AM

I think it gave her/them more a sense that they had a say in how i raise my children than they already would have had.  I think that he is now favored over DS2, even though they promised me while i was pregnant that would never happen.  by the time DS1 was 4 mos old they were BEGGING me to be able to take him on friday evenings for special Nana&Pawpaw time.  it didnt happen until he was closer to 9 mos or so.  With DS2 they havent even brought it up... at all.  Every time i turn around something i am doing is stopping DS1 from reaching his full potential according to them.  They have faught with us from day one about wether or not he is warm enough.  I keep him too cold so im stunting his growth, or its causing him to use too much energy that his brain isnt going to develop to its full potential.  They currently are not talking to us much because they do not agree with the safe use of carseats that we INSIST on. 

Basicly it has turned into they know whats best for my son(s) and i cant possibly know how to take care of them.  And i fully believe it would have never gotten this bad had i been able to find a reliable care provider before i went back to work (i had 3 or 4 flake out on me)

 

 

Quoting Slayton723:

Do you mind if I ask why? My dd will be staying with my parents when dh isn't home...
Quoting Emadele:

I went back at 12wks pp with both. The first time, nana watched him for the first 6wks or so so that wasn't too hard (there are times I wish I hadn't done that, but that's another story). The second time the boys went to a daycare provider that had been caring for ds1 for about 8mos so I felt comfortable.

I will admit though that I'm pretty much emotionally retarded and don't feel things like others do. I pretty much realized it had to be done and there wasn't anything that I could do about it and getting all emotional was just going to stress everyone out so why bother.



 

Married to Russell (7/27/09), Momma to Haydn (5/27/10) and Donavyn (8/1/12).
MomOwl
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 9:44 AM

I think your caregiver makes all the difference. if you trust your caregiver(s) it is easier.  If nathaniel was in a traditional daycare i'm sure I would be going crazy. But my mom watches the baby two days a week, and a neighbor watches him the other days. I went back at 10 weeks, part time, but still it was hard. I would rather be home with Nathaniel than at work trying to squeeze a 40+ hour a week job into 24 hours.

things that help me is having pictures on my desktop of my family. I update it reasonably regularly. . That 20 minutes of pumping for my son really helped me not feel so bad about leaving him.

hspear
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 11:34 AM
1 mom liked this

My DS was just barely over 8 weeks when I went back to work. Honestly, I hadn't planned on being off work that long, but he was 3 months early, so that entire 8 weeks was spent in the NICU with him. I sort of got to cheat as far as leaving him. I'm sure it would've been much harder to leave him each day for work if I hadn't already had a baptism-by-fire of sorts: SD lives with her mom, so for several years I'd already been experiencing not being allowed to be near my child (she may not be biologically mine, but I consider her my child), and then between nurses and my husband making me not stay in the NICU with DS 24/7 (literally got told to leave by 2 nurses and fought many times with DH over him saying I was there too much) and having him rolled away for his neverending battery of tests, I was used to having him taken from me, too.

It got harder when he was a bit older and actually at home, starting to realize that Mom was leaving, but I knew I had to. We couldn't pay the bills if I wasn't working because I didn't get paid maternity leave, and I knew I had to go to work in order to do my part in taking care of my family. Just keep that in mind that you're working to care for your LO, and spend extra snuggle/play time with them when you get to come home.

Good luck, mama!

proudMom2634
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 12:22 PM

BUMP!

peachesforme
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 1:43 PM

I waited 6 months to go to work. I work in a daycare so my baby was there beside me in the next room all day, and I got half off childcare.  I don't know what your profession is, but I think working in a childcare center is the best thing ever for a new mom.  Also, remember that the first step is the hardest.  After the first few weeks, you get used to the new routine.  good luck!

squeakers2
by Bronze Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 1:59 PM
I'm a SAHM this time around, but with my daughter I worked full time. I made a negotiation with my General Manager and District Manager that said for the first year I would work Fri, Sat, and Sun 10 to 12 hours a day, unless prior arrangements were made 2 weeks in advance. Bc my daughter was born in September, most of the weekends I was working 14 to 16 hour shifts due to snow and me being the closest to the store. I went back to work at 6 weeks. It was rough at first, but she was with my mom, who had been around her since birth. I called at least once a shift to check on her. Sadly, the arrangement stopped being honored at about 5 months bc the GM quit and the DM got moved to a different district. The new GM was useless and couldn't do his job (I was a shift manager and ended up running the store. I was out of work for 5 days due to having my wisdom teeth taken out and the store fell apart. When I got back, I had to do a schedule for the next week that started the next day, a truck order, and set up for a new promotion that started the next day.) and the DM was new and thought the DM didn't know how to his job even though he trained him. I am mad at myself for letting them bully me out of my agreement, but it can't be changed.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
mommys2babies
by Member on Jan. 20, 2013 at 3:07 PM
My son was 8 weeks when I went back to work. He stayed with his dad. I worked overnight. I lost my job when he was 4 1/2 months. I am expecting baby #2 in about 20 days. I will look for a job when she is 3 months old. I was nervous about leaving my son but knew he would be fine since he was with his dad.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
la_bella_vita
by Bella on Jan. 20, 2013 at 3:08 PM

 I've only ever been a SAHM so here is a bump for you!

ohmandy
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 5:01 PM
1 mom liked this

im gonna be in the same boat in september... not looking forward to it.  goodluck!!

Mrs.Fus29
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 7:27 PM

I went back once my son turned 8 wks and I cried everyday I had to  leave him.  Eventually I ended up quitting my job to stay home with him.  As long as you find someone that you really trust to watch your baby then you should be fine:)


Daisypath - (5Kco)

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