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NO IDEA what I'm doing! Help!

Posted by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 2:40 AM
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I have one month-old twin boys. I'm sure this is old news to all established moms, but literally all they've done for the last four weeks is eat, sleep, poop, cry, sleep, and cry.

I expected this, obviously. But I have no idea if I'm doing this right. When they cry and chew on their hands or otherwise signal hunger, DH and I feed them. They almost always fall asleep during feedings, so we wake them up with a diaper change so they'll finish their bottle. Then they're out cold again, so we put them to bed most of the time, because my mom said that they need to learn that their cribs are for sleeping. During the day, sometimes I'll put them out in the living room instead, in their swing/bouncy seat/etc to give them some "social time", even though they almost always just sleep there too.

Am I supposed to be doing something different? I feel awful that all we do is feed them and put them back to bed. During feedings we interact with them if they're alert, and any other time they're alert, we'll sit and hold them and talk to them and make faces. I sing to them at night before "bedtime" (I use the term loosely lol). But it feels wrong that there's nothing else to our sad excuse for a routine. Should we be playing with them? Doing something other than what we're doing at their age?

What did you do with your one month-old baby? What about two months?

by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 2:40 AM
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by Bronze Member on Feb. 25, 2013 at 2:47 AM
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1st let me say it sounds like you are doing a great job! 2nd there is no right or wrong way t this age just what feels right for you and your family. My ds1 I did exactly how you are now an he was a very easy baby. Ds2 was a Nicu baby on a heart monitor that I bf so I basically held him all the time now at 13 months he still wants to be held all the time and will only sleep in my arms. That worked for us with him (although now it's getting a little old lol) I'm sure the next one will be different too. :-) I do agree with grandma about them learning cribs are for sleeping because its harder to teach that when they get older. Trust me!! Lol
Good luck sounds like your doing great and congrats on twins!
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by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 10:10 AM
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That all sounds pretty normal to me for their age. I don't think you are doing anything wrong, as they get older they'll be awake more and want to play more. But at this age sleeping and eating is the norm.

by Silver Member on Feb. 25, 2013 at 11:44 AM
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They'll be awake more soon and you'll be wondering what the heck to do with them.   Sounds like you've got yourself some easy babies (thankfully, with twins!), so just enjoy the quiet while it lasts.   :)

by Gold Member on Feb. 25, 2013 at 1:10 PM
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That's pretty normal:-) Wait a couple months you'll be wishing they slept as much as they do now!
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by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 1:27 PM
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were they early?

My first was 6 weeks early and she literally slept constantly until 2 weeks past her due date, the pediatrician said it was normal because a normal newborn would sleep the first 2 weeks around the clock anyway and when early they need to sleep to give their bodies time and rest to grow.

Do what works for your family.  I don't do CIO, I do put them in their own bed early on, I cannot co-sleep.  I did have a betime "routine" but not schedule from early on...nurse, read, rock, sleep, they are now 23 months and 3.5 years and we still get a drink/snack, brush teeth, use the bathroom, read/rock, and go to sleep.  I wore both of my younger ones in slings/wraps/meitais from the moment we came home and many naps were taken that way (still are really because I go on the weekends to the mall when I know they are tired and will fall asleep in my meitai and Boba carriers, so DH and I wear them and they fall asleep)...they need to do tummy time a couple times a day, building up to doing it for longer and longer over time.  I like baby wearing (take turns with them if you like) because they are upright and not laying on their head so it helps them not get flat spots and because they are upright it helps with head/neck control as well.

by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 2:15 PM
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Sounds like you are doing great. They sleep a lot right now. But do remember that if you want to hold them sometimes while they sleep, it won't hurt in my opinion. Don't second quess yourself to much. Its nice to have advice but in the end, you are mommy and what's best for someone else may not be for you. Trust yourself and your instincts. And congrats. Enjoy your babies. Its okay to spoil them a little.
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by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 6:34 PM

Thanks everyone!

by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 6:37 PM
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We were ALL new once! Trust your instincts - you are doing fine.

by on Feb. 25, 2013 at 7:36 PM
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That's pretty much all I did with my baby when she was 1 month old. I breastfeed & I felt like all I did was breastfeed & change diapers for a good 2 months. Theres not much else to do with them at that age. There is a big growth spurt around 3 or 4 weeks so that might be all the crying & sleeping. You don't have to get them used to sleeping in their cribs if you don't want to. You can't sleep train a 4 week old baby & you also can't teach independance at that age. It's kind of an old school way of thinking. If you want them with you in the living room than let them sleep in their swings or bouncy seats if you want. Do whatever works for you & makes your life easier. If you want them in their crib then that's ok too.

by Bella on Feb. 25, 2013 at 9:24 PM


Quoting KylersMom8-16-7:

That's pretty normal:-) Wait a couple months you'll be wishing they slept as much as they do now!

 I agree

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