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grandparents charging to babysit?

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 do u think they should?

my mom charges us and i kinda think its B.S b/c i raised my brother was robbed of my childhood and didnt get paid!!! she says how much she loves her time with him so why charge me? doesnt she remember the hell she put me thru?!?!

by on Mar. 15, 2013 at 4:30 PM
Replies (21-30):
by on Mar. 16, 2013 at 11:44 AM
Just because they are grandparents doesn't mean they OWE you free babysitting :-)

Anybody who's not the parent of the child deserves to be compensated for caring for them, although many grandparents very GENEROUSLY choose to do it for no compensation.

My parents (when we lived closer) would never accept payment, but they knew I would pay them since I offered to, and they knew that I was extremely grateful and didn't think it was something they owed me.
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by on Mar. 16, 2013 at 12:15 PM

My parents never asked me to pay them when they watched our dds before we found a daycare, but my mom did tell me she would rather help me pay for daycare than watch the girls everyday because they are a handful and nothing got done while they were there.  They still watch them when they are sick and one of my parents is home.  I would not have had an issue paying if they asked and we had the money, they were taking eight or nine hours out of their day to watch my kids when they could have been doing something else.

by on Mar. 16, 2013 at 1:01 PM

my parents would never ask me to pay them for watching our daughter a couple of days a month. but if they were my 5-6 days a week babysitter/daycare, i would offer to pay them and pay their gas if they were coming onto our side of town. 

by Bronze Member on Mar. 17, 2013 at 12:53 AM

My family and my husbands family won't take money if we offered to pay them. We see it as family helping each other out.

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by on Mar. 17, 2013 at 1:10 AM

When we go out my DHs parents watch our son for us. They refuse money but we dont feel right not giving them ANYTHING so we usually give them money to take him out or order something in for themselves. They ask to take him out sometimes too, which he loves. I never ask anyone to watch my kid without compensation for their time. If they offer to take him or ask to take him, it's different. Like when I go grocery shopping, I offer them cash...MIL always says "Can you just pick me up...<insert whatever>?" because that's what she would use the money on anyway. Paying, or offering to pay, your parents or inlaws for watching your kid doesn't mean they love them any's a show of respect for them and their time and appreciation for doing you a favor. That's how I was raised anyway.


BTW if your mom was so terrible to you...why do you have her watch your kid?

by on Mar. 17, 2013 at 1:13 AM

My mom doesn't "charge" me, but I usually give her $20 a day that she watches my kid to cover gas and food

by Lorelai on Mar. 17, 2013 at 4:13 AM

My mom has always refused to take money for watching my kids. Even when Alexis was a baby and she was watching her everyday while I was at school. My grandparents watched me as a baby; they wouldn't take money either. I guess it's a tradition in our family.

Alexis Emma 10-13-1999 - 13 years old
Kirsten Leslie 03-14-2004 - 9 years old
Sarah Mackenzie 08-14-2007 - 5 years old
Charlotte Amelia & Harmon David 04-12-2012 - 11 months old
Angela Victoria 06-09-1996 - 16 years old (niece) 

by Mary on Mar. 17, 2013 at 7:03 AM

 I think it really depends on the family. My step gramma never charged my step mom when she sat with my half brother but would charge for me. My mil, won't take any kind of money from us but then I'm a sahm and only ask her to watch my youngest for a few hours if at all. I do make sure to send snacks and something to eat and will also go out and buy her lunch or dinner.

I can understand where you are coming from when it comes to watching siblings. I was the oldest too and was the live in babysitter and housekeeper. My bio dad & step mom explained it as "we clothe you, feed you and put a roof over your head. the least you can do is help around the house." (in truth I always hated that explanation, since I missed out on outings and could never really hold down a part time job. But back then what can you really do?)

by on Mar. 17, 2013 at 7:32 AM
I think every case is different. If it was a daily thing then yes I think they should get paid. If it's a 'hey can you watch my kids while I getting taxes done' sort of thing then no I don't think they should get paid.

Just an example. My dh's cousins have their grandparents watch their kids (a total of 5 kids under the age of 5 years) everyday 7 days a week. The grandparents don't get paid and the grandparents feed and bathe their great grandkids and many times they are spending the night. Is it fair to these people to care for these 5 kids all the time and not get paid? I don't think so but they're not. Yes they raised 6 kids of their own, great grandma had a daycare for years and watched her grandkids (for free) too, now that they are retired they are raising their great grandkids so their parents can go have fun or work.
Pretty much what I'm trying to get at. If it's every once in a while no they shouldn't be paid but it's something like my example above then yes they should be kwim?
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by on Mar. 17, 2013 at 8:50 AM
When DH and I leave Isabella with my parents we offer to pay. Considering Isabella is unhappy most of the time. She is a boob-addict.
But they only ask for me to cook for them as payment.
So I do. =) and while I do that, they get to spend tons of time with her.
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