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Advice Needed: When is it appropriate to have another child?

Posted by on Jun. 11, 2013 at 3:24 PM
  • 36 Replies

So I want two kids and i have a 9 month old. I dont want my children to be too far apart in age. I think 2 years apart is appropriate. But that means id have to get pregnant this december. My husband is not on the same page.

by on Jun. 11, 2013 at 3:24 PM
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Replies (1-10):
DACIA79
by Bronze Member on Jun. 11, 2013 at 3:31 PM
Everybody is different my kids are a year apart and that was hard. I think first off for me the first child should be potty trained and able to keep themselves busy without you always playing with them otherwise its going to be a battle for attention Its also important that the first kid is sleeping through the night before adding another.

I would wait until the oldest is preschool age before adding another if I could do it over again.
tyrelsmom
by Silver Member on Jun. 11, 2013 at 3:50 PM
1 mom liked this
I like about 2.5 years. I prefer to wait until baby is about 18 months before TTC. If your baby is an early potty learner, it'll be done before the new baby comes, otherwise they're not to old to wait and do it once life has settled in with the new baby, either way you won't have 2 in diapers for long. You have a chance of having the older child still napping when baby comes... But plenty old enough to stay at Grandma's while you're having the baby. And believe me, plenty close enough to have fun playing together once the younger one is about 1.5. My 18 month old and almost 4 year old are having a blast together right now, lol. Oh, also only one really in the toddler stage at a time. By the time the younger one is done being a baby, the older one is pretty much 4, which is when I find they tend to "smarten up".
To_the_moon
by on Jun. 11, 2013 at 3:58 PM
My dd is 6 months old and I'm pregnant with baby #2 right now. I think when ever you and your dh are both ready to have another child then that's the appropriate time to try to have another child.
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abra
by Abra on Jun. 11, 2013 at 3:59 PM
I didn't plan ours, but they are 3 years apart, 2 years apart, and 17 months apart (4 kids in total). I think how well they get along/how close they are emotionally depends more on how they are raised then the actual number of years or months between them. So honestly, the best thing to go would be to reach an agreement with your hubby and go with that. Best if luck to you!
Jenn8604
by Gold Member on Jun. 11, 2013 at 4:00 PM
I would ask my obgyn when I went for my yearly visit when (s)he thought was a healthy time for my body to go thru pregnancy again, but that's just me. I would want the healthiest pregnancy possible.
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charlieykay
by on Jun. 11, 2013 at 4:05 PM

I dont think 2.5 is bad . Maybe ill talk to my fiance about that.

charlieykay
by on Jun. 11, 2013 at 4:08 PM

The only reason i want them 2 years apart at most is so they can be in the same school . I have 5 siblings and i loved having them at school with me. Also because im the youngest. 

twogirl91
by on Jun. 11, 2013 at 4:09 PM

You have a baby when you feel you and your spouse feel it's time to have another one. We decided to try for our second baby when my oldest was 8months old. They are 17months apart and I love it! But we are giving 3-4 years before we have another one because it's what we want, and what we feel is right for our family. You and your husband need to work this out, if he's not ready, then it's not time to have another baby.

k8smimi
by on Jun. 11, 2013 at 4:15 PM

Mine are almost four years apart.  I had a miscarriage in between.  I ended up liking that age difference as we really had time to enjoy all the firsts with our dd before ds came along.  DD was potty trained, enjoyed being a "helper", could feed and dress herself and slept through the night.  It made it easier when it came time to furnish them cars and pay for college expenses with the age difference.  One was almost finished when the second was about to begin with college. 

la_bella_vita
by Bella on Jun. 11, 2013 at 5:19 PM

 Whatever you feel is best. I read someone that an expert says to wait 2 years, not sure how accurate that is

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