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Need advice for my 20mo (PIOG)

Posted by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 12:44 PM
  • 11 Replies

 My youngest dd is 20 months old and I have a couple of concerns that I am looking to get some advice on.

First is her eating habits. She is incredibly picky and won't even try new things. The rare occasion I get her to try something new she either immediately spits it out or, if she does manage to swallow it, will begin gagging. She does it with food and drinks. The only thing she will drink is water and breast milk (straight from the breast, refuses it in a cup). For food, she refuses to eat any fruits or veggies in any form. She will eat some meat (usually only chicken or hamburger), she loves cheese, cereal (I try to limit this to cheerios but she has occasionally been allowed some of the other sweeter cereals like lucky charms), nutrigrain bars, toast, pb&j, mac&cheese...I think that's pretty much it. I offer her whatever we are eating at every meal. I'm usually lucky if she'll take a couple of bites unless it's one of the foods I listed above. Only drinking water, you would think that would be a good thing, but when I need her to drink something to help her out with another issue (i.e. apple juice to help if she becomes constipated) I'm out of luck and trying to find other ways to help.

The other concern is sleep. At 20 months old she should pretty much be sleeping through the night. She does not though. She will still wake at least once or twice and usually nurses from that point until we get up in the morning (this can be HOURS). To make matters worse, her sleep schedule will not stay reasonable. She fights taking a nap all day long, usually not going to sleep until 7:30pm-8:00pm. She'll treat that as a nap, wake up 2-3 hours later, then wants to play again for another 4-5 hours before she's finally ready to go to sleep for the night. I. Am. EXHAUSTED! I have a 4yo as well, work full time from home while taking care of both of my girls, take care of the house, run errands, etc. I'm not getting to sleep until anywhere between 2am and 5am pretty much every night. Lately my dh gives in and ends up taking her for a drive because that seems to be the only thing that will get her to sleep at night anymore (once she gets sleepy enough). Any other efforts we make just don't work. I have run out of ideas! A friend and my sister both recommended the kids sleepytime tea. I tried it last night but couldn't get her to drink it (I tried to allow her to drink it herself and when that didn't work I tried using a syringe to give it to her and she ended up gagging. I got about 2 small swallows into her which was pretty much useless).

I would love to finish weaning her but between the sleep issue and the food issue, I worry about taking the breastmilk away completely. I am seriously at a loss at this point. My oldest dd fought her naps at this age but slept great at night and never had the food issue so this is all new. HELP!

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by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 12:44 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Junebaby18
by Nannerz on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:04 PM
The food choices she eats are very typical of a toddler. My first and third ate/eat very similar to her. My dd is still bf at 25. Just keep offering her new food. They say it can take up to 10 times trying a new food for them for them to accept it. Don't force her to eat, just offer different stuff. Don't make "special" meals just for her though as that will only encourage her behavior.
IrishIz
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:07 PM
Um...sounds like a normal 20 month old. They are frequently picky eaters. They will survive. They also don't have to be sleeping through. The night at 20 months. Move her bed time back a little and see how they goes.

I don't see the issue with toddler...just a mom who prefers untoddlerlike behaviors.
Baby_Avas_Momma
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:32 PM
Agreed :)

Quoting IrishIz:

Um...sounds like a normal 20 month old. They are frequently picky eaters. They will survive. They also don't have to be sleeping through. The night at 20 months. Move her bed time back a little and see how they goes.



I don't see the issue with toddler...just a mom who prefers untoddlerlike behaviors.
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expectantmom81
by Erin on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:55 PM
The food part is totally normal. As far as the sleep goes, we did the CIO method and both boys did great.
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rebeccasmommy09
by Christina on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:58 PM

 I could live with her waking up IF we could get her sleeping at normal times, not napping at 8pm then up and playing from 11pm-4am every night. I've tried getting her on a better schedule before. It'll last a day or two then we're right back here. We used to have her on a normal schedule where she would usually nap from around 2-4 then bed between 10 and 11. I had no problems with that (including her waking up once or twice at night to nurse). I just can't seem to get her to stay on that schedule anymore for some reason. Hence the reason I'm asking for advice from anyone who may have experienced a similar situation. My oldest was not like this so I have no experience to draw from myself in this situation.

The food, again my oldest was not so picky and was happy to eat most things and drink most things. My concern was she wouldn't get all the nutrients she needs without me nursing her which I would like to wean her from. I understand phases but this is something that has been an issue from the start. I do offer her a variety of foods (I make her a plate for every meal with whatever the rest of the family is eating) but she rarely eats more than maybe (and that's a big maybe, usually the food is untouched) a bite or two of anything other than what I listed in my OP.

Quoting IrishIz:

Um...sounds like a normal 20 month old. They are frequently picky eaters. They will survive. They also don't have to be sleeping through. The night at 20 months. Move her bed time back a little and see how they goes.

I don't see the issue with toddler...just a mom who prefers untoddlerlike behaviors.

 

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cabrandy03
by Brandy on Jul. 24, 2013 at 2:17 PM

In all honestly she sounds like a totally normal 20 month old.  My 2.5 year old has always been super picky and only eats a handful of different foods and hates trying new things.  All you can really do is keep offering other foods, eventuallly she will begin trying them.  It's also normal for some kids that age to still wake a few times a night. My daughter didn't start sleeping through the night until about a month ago (and like I said she's 2 and half).  Maybe stop letting her nap at 7:30 and force her to stay awake until 8:30ish and just put her to bed for the night or really limit that nap, only let her sleep 45 minutes.  Maybe without that late in the day nap she'll go to sleep and stay asleep for most of the night.  Hopefully once she gets in the habit of going to sleep for the night at a reasonable hour she'll move her nap up a little earlier in the day and then you can let her nap a little longer.

rebeccasmommy09
by Christina on Jul. 24, 2013 at 2:21 PM

 I've tried keeping her up later without a nap once we get past a certain point. It doesn't seem to matter what time she goes down. Once she goes down the first time, she'll sleep 2-3 hours then is up and ready to play again for 4-5 hours, keeping us up until between 3am and 5am. :( Maybe I'll have to try waking her up after 45min-1hr and see what that does. I've considered that before but always think "what if she's actually going to sleep for the night this time." Of course, she rarely does and then I kick myself for not waking her up.

Quoting cabrandy03:

In all honestly she sounds like a totally normal 20 month old.  My 2.5 year old has always been super picky and only eats a handful of different foods and hates trying new things.  All you can really do is keep offering other foods, eventuallly she will begin trying them.  It's also normal for some kids that age to still wake a few times a night. My daughter didn't start sleeping through the night until about a month ago (and like I said she's 2 and half).  Maybe stop letting her nap at 7:30 and force her to stay awake until 8:30ish and just put her to bed for the night or really limit that nap, only let her sleep 45 minutes.  Maybe without that late in the day nap she'll go to sleep and stay asleep for most of the night.  Hopefully once she gets in the habit of going to sleep for the night at a reasonable hour she'll move her nap up a little earlier in the day and then you can let her nap a little longer.

 

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cabrandy03
by Brandy on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:03 PM

Has the wierd sleep schedule been going on for a long time or is it a recent development?  My daughter went through this really horrible phase around her 2nd birthday where she pushed her nap way back in the day and then wanted to stay up half the night before she would go to bed but luckily it didn't last long.  After about 6 weeks she put herself back on a more normal schedule.  So maybe it's just a weird phase she's going through???

Quoting rebeccasmommy09:

 I've tried keeping her up later without a nap once we get past a certain point. It doesn't seem to matter what time she goes down. Once she goes down the first time, she'll sleep 2-3 hours then is up and ready to play again for 4-5 hours, keeping us up until between 3am and 5am. :( Maybe I'll have to try waking her up after 45min-1hr and see what that does. I've considered that before but always think "what if she's actually going to sleep for the night this time." Of course, she rarely does and then I kick myself for not waking her up.

Quoting cabrandy03:

In all honestly she sounds like a totally normal 20 month old.  My 2.5 year old has always been super picky and only eats a handful of different foods and hates trying new things.  All you can really do is keep offering other foods, eventuallly she will begin trying them.  It's also normal for some kids that age to still wake a few times a night. My daughter didn't start sleeping through the night until about a month ago (and like I said she's 2 and half).  Maybe stop letting her nap at 7:30 and force her to stay awake until 8:30ish and just put her to bed for the night or really limit that nap, only let her sleep 45 minutes.  Maybe without that late in the day nap she'll go to sleep and stay asleep for most of the night.  Hopefully once she gets in the habit of going to sleep for the night at a reasonable hour she'll move her nap up a little earlier in the day and then you can let her nap a little longer.

 


rebeccasmommy09
by Christina on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:12 PM

 It's been going on for a few weeks now. She has gone through different phases with sleep. There were a few months where every single night she was nursing from one side to the other constantly all night long. I got almost no sleep during that time (it lasted several months). She still does that some but not all night long, more like an hour or so. Most of the time, when she wakes up again, she'll stick to the same side for a while but she keeps my nipple in her mouth and comfort nurses for a couple of hours before switching sides. She'll start the back and forth deal about 30min-1hr before she wakes up for the morning.

Has the wierd sleep schedule been going on for a long time or is it a recent development?  My daughter went through this really horrible phase around her 2nd birthday where she pushed her nap way back in the day and then wanted to stay up half the night before she would go to bed but luckily it didn't last long.  After about 6 weeks she put herself back on a more normal schedule.  So maybe it's just a weird phase she's going through???

Quoting rebeccasmommy09:

 I've tried keeping her up later without a nap once we get past a certain point. It doesn't seem to matter what time she goes down. Once she goes down the first time, she'll sleep 2-3 hours then is up and ready to play again for 4-5 hours, keeping us up until between 3am and 5am. :( Maybe I'll have to try waking her up after 45min-1hr and see what that does. I've considered that before but always think "what if she's actually going to sleep for the night this time." Of course, she rarely does and then I kick myself for not waking her up.

Quoting cabrandy03:

In all honestly she sounds like a totally normal 20 month old.  My 2.5 year old has always been super picky and only eats a handful of different foods and hates trying new things.  All you can really do is keep offering other foods, eventuallly she will begin trying them.  It's also normal for some kids that age to still wake a few times a night. My daughter didn't start sleeping through the night until about a month ago (and like I said she's 2 and half).  Maybe stop letting her nap at 7:30 and force her to stay awake until 8:30ish and just put her to bed for the night or really limit that nap, only let her sleep 45 minutes.  Maybe without that late in the day nap she'll go to sleep and stay asleep for most of the night.  Hopefully once she gets in the habit of going to sleep for the night at a reasonable hour she'll move her nap up a little earlier in the day and then you can let her nap a little longer.

 


 

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angela.bouchard
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:19 PM

I've always only offered my son what we are eating for dinner and healthy snacks. Occasionally we do mac n cheese or something but we do not make separate meals for him. I wouldn't say that he's a perfect eater but at least what he does eat is healthy. :)

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