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1st time mom 22 yrs husband is the biggest baby of them all a lazy one too help me!!!!

Posted by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 8:11 PM
  • 4 Replies

hi first time mom here. i am a 22 yr old who OWNS our house. my husband is a chef and works every day all day leaving me to attend to a baby amd a house make dinner n maybe do my nails. he comes home is exhausted and rarely notices what i do. my child is going thru seperation anx at 9 month and changin a diaper is now a challenge. asking him for help to change her so i can go grab his work clothes is a torture for my baby n me and he gets so fusterated. it makes it 100 more times harder on me. hes home at nights early mornign and i have to do everything include mowing n yard work. i just cant do it all. he comes home and wants to drink beer n leave cans everywhere throw clothes by the basket n put plates with food in sink. i just cant keep it up. he does nothign here and i am left to do it. i dont get paid like him so it makes my "job" so fusterating. i get absolutely no help from him. were married n together the way it shoudl be but one of these days i may just drop dead at the rate im going. i cant not do laundry or dishes because i need the clothes n plates. what can i say to get thru to him he doesnt take me seriously n thinks im being too controllling. i leave the house one time every two weeks for groceries with a baby and stop at several stores which is rough on her n me n he complains if i forgot something n he has to go. he just yells n gets angry at me if i ask for help. what can i say to him. as it is his mom thinks i should work and told me when we told her i was prego that i have ruined her sons fiancial life n we should not be sleeping together in OUR house. so he thinks i should just do EVERY damn thing on the earth n not complain bt yet he complains when he has to feed 50 ppl. i hear so much about his work and he just sits on his ass with a beer can in his hand. i cannot do this any more im seriously struggling. i live off monster energy drinks not healthy but their the only thing that gets me going. HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 8:11 PM
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Replies (1-4):
Junebaby18
by Nannerz on Jul. 24, 2013 at 10:33 PM
Leave his dirty dishes and dirty clothes where he leaves them. Cook food for both of you, but don't serve it to him. Let him get it himself. Do your laundry and your dishes.

I am very much not anti-man, but he is acting like a child leaving stuff around like that.
gingerszabo21
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 10:38 PM
1 mom liked this

Paper plate and plastic silverware saved my sanity for the first 3 months after I had a baby.  Put a small trash can next to where he leaves his beer cans and tell him to use it.

angela.bouchard
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 11:07 PM

This and I would also say specific things that you need his help with. Like mowing the lawn, taking the trash out, etc.

Quoting Junebaby18:

Leave his dirty dishes and dirty clothes where he leaves them. Cook food for both of you, but don't serve it to him. Let him get it himself. Do your laundry and your dishes.

I am very much not anti-man, but he is acting like a child leaving stuff around like that.



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abra
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 11:54 PM
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Sweetie, neither your attitude or his actions will make your marriage work. Complaining to strangers on the internet won't help, either. You both need to either commit to really love one another (and that means you'll have to help him with his clothes, food and lawn and he will have to help you, too!) or you both need to cut your losses and get a divorce. I can tell you right now, your attitude is just as bad has his actions! You both need help. Seriously. When a marriage isn't working, very rarely is the husband or the wife innocent. It takes TWO people to make a marriage work and marriage IS work. Anything worth having is worth working for. You both need to stop being so selfish!
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