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Sleep *HELP*

Posted by on Jul. 25, 2013 at 2:46 AM
  • 43 Replies
Let me start by saying, I bf my LO (8 wks old). And she almost always falls asleep while nursing. So in the middle of the night when I'm asleep and she wakes up, I nurse and we fall asleep together. I know some parents are very against that because of SIDS and stuff. But I personally feel like my instincts are good enough to not get into a real deep sleep if I'm laying with my dd -so no cause for alarm of suffocating her or anything else. With that said, my SO worries that baby is getting too dependant on laying with me and his mother is a little upset because "she spent good money on a bassinet for her" and we haven't used it even once. I'd honestly like to get some use out of it and also allow my dd to transition into sleeping on her own. I do not want her to "cry it out." A little fussing and a little crying, ok. But when she gets to the point of screaming, I can't handle it. I read that they stop crying and fall asleep because they feel abandoned and have given up all hope of reassurance and comfort. I'd like to focus on how she feels rather than forcing a behavior (of sleeping alone). So if they are any POSITIVE suggestions from moms who've been in my position, rather than moms who want to tell me how much I'm spoiling my infant, I'd love some (positive) feedback! [Sorry if I sound like a bitch. I just hate when ladies get on here and give p.o's telling other ladies how to parent. I'm asking for help. Not opinions or judgement.] Thank you! :)

*UPDATE: So my mom and my SO's mom tell me to put dd down and just let her cry. I CANNOT bring myself to do that! And I know they're trying to help but I never told them what they should do as parents. Do I pretend to listen and let it all go out the other end or do I stand up for myself and say "thank you for your advice but no thank you. It's something I have to figure out on my own." ?! :'(
by on Jul. 25, 2013 at 2:46 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Ptitchou
by on Jul. 25, 2013 at 3:01 AM
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You're not spoiling your infant. Cosleeping is a natural way to sleep. It's far from a new concept and it is safer than crib sleeping.

Wish I could help you with the transition. But I bed share happily. My 8 m old to be wouldn't want it any other way. And her lonely crib is getting dusty.

Good luck! I've heard about a book called the No Cry Sleep Solution that may help you out but I've never employed the methods.
mkhc-531
by on Jul. 25, 2013 at 3:08 AM
Thank you :) .. I know A LOT of moms co sleep but there will be those one or 2 that want to make a nasty comment or give an opinion on how unsafe it is and how I'm my daughter will be spoiled and all that.. I don't want shitty opinions. Just helpful advice. Lol. Thank you for the book suggestion. I'll see if I can find it at the library :)


Quoting Ptitchou:

You're not spoiling your infant. Cosleeping is a natural way to sleep. It's far from a new concept and it is safer than crib sleeping.



Wish I could help you with the transition. But I bed share happily. My 8 m old to be wouldn't want it any other way. And her lonely crib is getting dusty.



Good luck! I've heard about a book called the No Cry Sleep Solution that may help you out but I've never employed the methods.

polkaspots
by Silver Member on Jul. 25, 2013 at 3:55 AM
3 moms liked this
Try putting her it in for naps and any other time you can. Just place her down after she's asleep. You're more likely to get her down without waking if she's been up for a while. It's what I did, and although I'm still cosleeping part time now, he has always slept by himself well. I think it makes it easier to put them in their sleeping space at least once a day to help them get used to it.
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mkhc-531
by on Jul. 25, 2013 at 4:09 AM
Thank you I'll try that. I just feel like she doesn't like the bassinet because its more confined and she can't see out of it. But thats probably just me. She probably doesn't care where it is. She just knows mommy isn't in there with her lol


Quoting polkaspots:

Try putting her it in for naps and any other time you can. Just place her down after she's asleep. You're more likely to get her down without waking if she's been up for a while. It's what I did, and although I'm still cosleeping part time now, he has always slept by himself well. I think it makes it easier to put them in their sleeping space at least once a day to help them get used to it.

polkaspots
by Silver Member on Jul. 25, 2013 at 4:13 AM
Aren't her eyes closed when she's asleep? I suck at teaching babies to go to sleep by themselves, but I've never had a problem with putting them in their own spaces. I do cosleep for quite a while, but I like to get things done when theyre alseep. Dishes, shower, cleaning... So I almost always put them down somewhere safe once a day.


Quoting mkhc-531:

Thank you I'll try that. I just feel like she doesn't like the bassinet because its more confined and she can't see out of it. But thats probably just me. She probably doesn't care where it is. She just knows mommy isn't in there with her lol




Quoting polkaspots:

Try putting her it in for naps and any other time you can. Just place her down after she's asleep. You're more likely to get her down without waking if she's been up for a while. It's what I did, and although I'm still cosleeping part time now, he has always slept by himself well. I think it makes it easier to put them in their sleeping space at least once a day to help them get used to it.


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JerrysMom2011
by Member on Jul. 25, 2013 at 4:22 AM

We are a co-sleeping house as well, We have shared a bed with our toddler since he was 8 months old because his leg got caught up in the crib slates all the way up past his knee and we couldnt get him loose so we had to call the ambulance, i feel its safer. The nap idea is a good idea, but you could always keep the bassinet and use with next baby. I feel the same way you do, I like knowing my son knows I am there at night, and yes it can get irritating when he wakes up to mommy not in the bed and he throws a fit, but the love and hugs I get when i do come back to bed are all worth it, he isnt spoiled very much but I could never let him cry it out when he was a baby either

Katt709
by Silver Member on Jul. 25, 2013 at 4:29 AM
3 moms liked this
Truthfully I'd just keep doing what you're doing. You and baby will get much more sleep and be happier. If mil is worried about the money she spent, sell the bassinet and give her the money. And dh needs to get on board sign co sleeping. It's easier and more natural than baby sleeping in a crib. Good luck.
expectantmom81
by Erin on Jul. 25, 2013 at 9:37 AM
Here's a bump cause I did CIO
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Mom2Just1
by Gold Member on Jul. 25, 2013 at 9:54 AM

She will eventually sleep in her own crib.  If it works keep doing it.

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brittany208
by on Jul. 25, 2013 at 10:01 AM
1 mom liked this

for me, i need baby to be ABLE to sleep on his own (in his pack n play right next to my bed), but Im fine with him in bed with me sometimes too.

nurse baby almost to sleep, but still a smidgen awake, then lay her in her bassinet. she should be so milk drunk, tired, and cozy that she will drift off to sleep. if she makes little noises in her sleep, let her be so she can fall back to sleep on her own. if she wakes up crying, pick her up and settle her back to almost asleep then put her down again. you may do this several times over several days. you dont have to force her to sleep there, just get her used to being in there in the middle of the night.

also, do you have a bedtime routine so she knows its sleep time? every night i give DS a bath, then put him in his sleeper, nurse him with lights out, and put him in his pack n play. babies dont need baths everyday, it was just so hot, i started doing them to cool him off before bed and he loves them so it became our routine. anyways, when we do our routine, baby knows its sleeptime and goes right to sleep no problem.

my DS is also 8wk by the way

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